Reviews from

No More Than We Can Bear

Something lost contest entry

7 total reviews 
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh my goodness, is this a true story, if it is, I am so sorry for your loss. I have heard of that drug and how dangerous it is. Your poem is well rhymed and metered and the sentiments are heart breaking, you won my vote, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 10-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 10-Nov-2023
    Thank you for the great review, Dolly. Yes, it's true. She was 36. Her husband couldn't keep his act together in raising a family and he went to prison for a stretch and she lost the grandkids. After that, depression led her down a path of drugs that I didn't have any clue about. Aug 24th of 2022, I got the call that she had overdosed. It makes it hard to keep the faith sometimes. I dearly appreciate the gracious stars and support, Dolly. Thank you again.
reply by Dolly'sPoems on 10-Nov-2023
    I am so sorry to hear this very sad story, how tragic this is. Prescriptions drugs can be very dangerous. A touching poem and I hope you win the contest, love Dolly x
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I hate that I did not have a sixth star left for this excruciatingly beautiful poem you have penned, replete with the most painful of questions. You have done an incredible job pouring out your heart while still maintaining your wits and common sense. That is a fine, fine line to forge, indeed. There is no melodrama here. Sorrow, yes. But also an honest question that begs a prolonged bout of rumination before it can even begin to be answered. Absolutely stunning job. This is the one that will receive my vote.

I am sending you so much love today. xoxox

 Comment Written 10-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 10-Nov-2023
    Thank you for the great review and big six offer, Rachelle. Yeah, she died at 36 the August before last. She lost her kids because her husband couldn't get his shit together and depression turned her to drugs and I didn't have a clue until I found out too late to save my little girl. Yes, faith is a hard thing to keep sometimes. I dearly appreciate the stars and support, R. Thank you again.
Comment from Dawn of Tomorrow
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I think we can temporarily lose faith but I also believe we find our way back. I like your structure here, I forget the name of this form but you have done it well. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 08-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 08-Nov-2023
    I do too. Thank you for the great review, Dawn. I actually forgot what this form is too. Lol. Someone else asked me but I didn't have an answer. I even looked it up one time and couldn't find what it's called. What can you do? I appreciate the generous stars and good luck wishes. Thank you again.
Comment from Aiona
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Such an interesting poem. Is there a name for this structure, where the first line repeats in each stanza, in a different place, such that the poem then ends with the beginning line? It follows the prompt of a poem that rhymes. The prompt was "something lose" but not a person. And in this case, the poem is about the loss of faith. A sad but well-written poem.

 Comment Written 08-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 08-Nov-2023
    Thank you so much for the kind review and big sixer, Aiona. I know this form has a name, where you drop the line by one each time, but I don't know what it is. I've looked it up before but can't find any results. Sorry about that. I dearly appreciate the gracious rating. Have yourself a wonderful night and thank you again.
Comment from Navada
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a powerful poem about the loss of faith and explores some of the earthly challenges that can tug us away from it. You employed a really good metre here and it lends a pace and rhythm to the piece. One suggestion - I think the final word of the second stanza should read "pursues". Thanks for the share and good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 08-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 08-Nov-2023
    Thank you so much for the great review and catching the goof, Navada. I fixed it. I really appreciate the kind comments and good luck wishes. Have yourself a wonderful night
Comment from jim vecchio
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

The rules say not to write about someone, but I say FORGET the rules! This is a truly heartbreaking entry. I hope it's not autobiographical, but, if so, there's nothing in the Bible that says drugs or suicide will keep you out of Heaven. Christ told a dying sinner on the Cross that He would see him that day in Paradise.

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 07-Nov-2023
    Thank you for the great review, Jim. It's about losing faith because of who I lost so it wasn't really about losing someone. Yes, it's biographical. I sure hope you're right. We'll all find out in the end. I really appreciate the generous stars, friend.
reply by jim vecchio on 07-Nov-2023
    I believe, as The Bible says, that, in Heaven, God will wipe away all tears from our eyes.
Comment from Wendyanne
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh yes we can definitely lose faith especially if we lose a 'child' whatever their age is. I enjoyed this style of poetry and the repetition of "Is faith a thing that one can lose?" Very well done.

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2023


reply by the author on 07-Nov-2023
    Thank you for the great review and gracious stars, Wendy.