Desire
The heat of desire17 total reviews
Comment from Treischel
Hmm, the metaphor of the fire of desire a was very subtle, that I almost hesitate to classify it so. However the theme was sultry. I found the juxtaposition of an instant when eyes met, to the postulation of eternity, compelling. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2024
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Hmm, the metaphor of the fire of desire a was very subtle, that I almost hesitate to classify it so. However the theme was sultry. I found the juxtaposition of an instant when eyes met, to the postulation of eternity, compelling. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 17-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2024
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Oh that contest came and went and of course I did not win...what else is new..ha ha... This was an easy write.. as was The last Kiss.
Lisa
Comment from Sarita Méndez
This is an excellent one line poem, with a great metaphor. You are a very good author in poetry!
Thank you for sharing and good luck for the contest.
Merry Christmas (even if the day is almost finished!) :)
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2023
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This is an excellent one line poem, with a great metaphor. You are a very good author in poetry!
Thank you for sharing and good luck for the contest.
Merry Christmas (even if the day is almost finished!) :)
Comment Written 25-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 25-Dec-2023
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Oh yes, and Merry Christmas to you as well Sarita..
Such a kind thing to say...
I did place second in that one...
Lisa
Comment from Bob Schatz
Very nice Lisa! You put a lot of fire and beauty into one line. It really is impressive my friend! I haven't been on the site for awhile and it is a pleasure to read your post.
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2023
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Very nice Lisa! You put a lot of fire and beauty into one line. It really is impressive my friend! I haven't been on the site for awhile and it is a pleasure to read your post.
Comment Written 21-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2023
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You are such a doll to read my work... These last 3 are very different from my others. I came in 2nd here...
But what is really important are the many fabulous reviews I got.
Thank you again for taking the time to read and review...
Always appreciated,
Lisa
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You are something special Lisa. I am honored to know you and grateful for your friendship. (I posted the improved version of Limbus Infantum that won me poem of the week. Tighter and, I think, more impactful.)
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Wow, what a lovely thing to say Bob and I so appreciate it... I feel the same way and look forward to reading your new version.
Lisa
Comment from Daylily
I like the passion expressed in this one line metaphor. It is well-written and relatable. Deep emotions, equally shared, is a powerful thing. Best wishes in the contest, Lisa!
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2023
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I like the passion expressed in this one line metaphor. It is well-written and relatable. Deep emotions, equally shared, is a powerful thing. Best wishes in the contest, Lisa!
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 21-Dec-2023
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Thank you so much for reading and reviewing my poem dear Lily.
And, you best wishes... Always appreciated,
Lisa
Comment from Sugarray77
You did a wonderful job with this prompt for a one liner with fire used as a metaphor. Great job and I know you will do well int he contest. I wish you luck in the contest, Lisa.
Melissa
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
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You did a wonderful job with this prompt for a one liner with fire used as a metaphor. Great job and I know you will do well int he contest. I wish you luck in the contest, Lisa.
Melissa
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
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Thank you so much for your wonderful review... I have gotten so many positive reviews...booths opened but no I am not doing well...
But that is okay...the reviews are what count.
Lisa
Comment from CrystieCookie999
This is a good entry that definitely meets the contest prompt. I like the proper use of the semi-colon here. Fire is often a metaphor for love/desire. This also uses great long 'i' assonance in desire/eyes/mine/fire/dies. I hope this does well in the contest!
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
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This is a good entry that definitely meets the contest prompt. I like the proper use of the semi-colon here. Fire is often a metaphor for love/desire. This also uses great long 'i' assonance in desire/eyes/mine/fire/dies. I hope this does well in the contest!
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
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Good morning Cyrstie,
How very nice to hear from you! I love your review of my poem. I am delighted that you caught my i..... you are the only one so far...
Also, although I see your name on my Fan list I never get your posts. I am going to check on that now.
I hope so too..but we will see...
Lisa
Comment from lyenochka
I like how you show that immediately impact of two people who know that they love each other at first sight when their eyes met. But that ignited fire is still felt even when apart. Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
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I like how you show that immediately impact of two people who know that they love each other at first sight when their eyes met. But that ignited fire is still felt even when apart. Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 20-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
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I am delighted that you liked my little poem...
I enjoyed writing it...The rules of the contest "sparked" (no pun intended) my interest....
Lisa
Comment from Jim Wile
Nice job, Lisa. Fire is indeed a good metaphor for desire, as that telling look can set your feelings on fire. Even the memory of it when alone can rekindle the flame.
One suggestion: I would either make this two separate sentences or put a semicolon between "mine" and "even," since both statements are complete sentences. The second follows the first closely enough that a semicolon would also be appropriate. - Jim
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2023
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Nice job, Lisa. Fire is indeed a good metaphor for desire, as that telling look can set your feelings on fire. Even the memory of it when alone can rekindle the flame.
One suggestion: I would either make this two separate sentences or put a semicolon between "mine" and "even," since both statements are complete sentences. The second follows the first closely enough that a semicolon would also be appropriate. - Jim
Comment Written 19-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2023
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Interesting Jim
You are the second person to mention a Semi colon.
I had at first made Teo complete sentences but the contest is asking for only one sentence.
I could not decided between a comma or semi colon.
Just changed it?
Thank you,
Lisa
Comment from Kaiku
Nice job with this prompt. I honestly believe there isn't enough writing that requires something more than a literal translation to understand what the writer is looking to accomplish.
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2023
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Nice job with this prompt. I honestly believe there isn't enough writing that requires something more than a literal translation to understand what the writer is looking to accomplish.
Comment Written 19-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 19-Dec-2023
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Thank you so much
I appreciate your review?
Lisa
Comment from karenina
What an interesting contest! "Skill building" ought to be a central purpose of this site and thus I enjoy contests that are not blind...
Fire and passion seem a well-matched metaphor... There is that sense of a spark, a small flame ignited. a growing display, and finally a bed of red-hot embers below and a wildly dancing display of heat and untamed conflagration!
And all in eighteen syllables?
Quite impressive!
Karenina
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
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What an interesting contest! "Skill building" ought to be a central purpose of this site and thus I enjoy contests that are not blind...
Fire and passion seem a well-matched metaphor... There is that sense of a spark, a small flame ignited. a growing display, and finally a bed of red-hot embers below and a wildly dancing display of heat and untamed conflagration!
And all in eighteen syllables?
Quite impressive!
Karenina
Comment Written 19-Dec-2023
reply by the author on 20-Dec-2023
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Good morning Karenina, Your review is like a poem in itself...really marvelous!
Thank you so much for always being supportive.
Lisa
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You are very welcome!
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Hugging you from afar...
Lisa
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I'll take it and return it in kind!
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So sweet... as always..
Lisa
