Beautiful Downward Spiral
Life and happiness can change within minutes.47 total reviews
Comment from Sally Law
Beautifully written and presented haiku stack spanning a gamut of emotions. Winter tends to have that effect on me too. Your depth here is beautiful.
Sending you my best today as always and a virtual six for this fine offering.
Sal :))
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2024
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Beautifully written and presented haiku stack spanning a gamut of emotions. Winter tends to have that effect on me too. Your depth here is beautiful.
Sending you my best today as always and a virtual six for this fine offering.
Sal :))
Comment Written 17-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing, Sally. I appreciate your feedback. (Sorry for the late reply. I've just now recovered from two back-to-back sicknesses: occupational hazard of being a teacher--and not one I would trade for the world.) Thank you again for reading.
Comment from Jumbo J
Hi A. Myers,
certainly was a mixed bag of emotions. It was a unique approach to telling a story within the sections of thought capturing our attention at any given time. An inspiration causing inner dialogue. All in form, all with their own outlook and yet woven together beautifully.
I love the progressive manner in which you composed each haiku.
I see the beauty of awe, the innocence allowing the wonder of nature. I see and feel the reality of what life brings. The thoughts that circle your mind like carrion in the surreal corners of one's mind... and yes, the time that we can never regain, yet plays over and over as if we somehow could change the outcome.
My thoughts and prayers to you and your family, it's not a very nice thing to watch the once strong and capable dwindle and fade. I lost my father last month, so I did feel your words and their intentions with a certain connection.
Beautiful composition and progression... I enjoyed reading your work very much.
With our thoughts we create...
the subtleties of change.
Kindest regards,
James.
******Star Exceptional!!!!!!
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2024
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Hi A. Myers,
certainly was a mixed bag of emotions. It was a unique approach to telling a story within the sections of thought capturing our attention at any given time. An inspiration causing inner dialogue. All in form, all with their own outlook and yet woven together beautifully.
I love the progressive manner in which you composed each haiku.
I see the beauty of awe, the innocence allowing the wonder of nature. I see and feel the reality of what life brings. The thoughts that circle your mind like carrion in the surreal corners of one's mind... and yes, the time that we can never regain, yet plays over and over as if we somehow could change the outcome.
My thoughts and prayers to you and your family, it's not a very nice thing to watch the once strong and capable dwindle and fade. I lost my father last month, so I did feel your words and their intentions with a certain connection.
Beautiful composition and progression... I enjoyed reading your work very much.
With our thoughts we create...
the subtleties of change.
Kindest regards,
James.
******Star Exceptional!!!!!!
Comment Written 17-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing, James. I appreciate your feedback, and I feel honored by your words. Thank you! (Sorry for the late reply. I've just now recovered from two back-to-back sicknesses: occupational hazard of being a teacher--and not one I would trade for the world.) Thank you again for reading.
Comment from rjuselius
This is a beautifully written piece of poetry dear friend! The beginning is so positive yet the ending so sad. Bravo! Brilliantly done.
Thank you for sharing!
Blessings with hugs and kisses!
Rebekka x
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2024
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This is a beautifully written piece of poetry dear friend! The beginning is so positive yet the ending so sad. Bravo! Brilliantly done.
Thank you for sharing!
Blessings with hugs and kisses!
Rebekka x
Comment Written 17-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing, Rebekka. I'm honored by your words. Thank you! I'm thrilled you enjoyed it. Take care. :D :D
Comment from Aussie
Very interesting poem, with much sadness too. When we liken the seasons of the weather to the seasons of our lives, winter is where Dad is now. Thanks for sharing a well-set-out poem.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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Very interesting poem, with much sadness too. When we liken the seasons of the weather to the seasons of our lives, winter is where Dad is now. Thanks for sharing a well-set-out poem.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing, Aussie. I appreciate your feedback, and I'm glad you enjoyed it. Best wishes and take care. :D :D
Comment from Treischel
A whole suite of Haikus. Spilling out indeed. They expertly reflect several life challenges and joys as they fall like drops of rain upon a waiting flower pot. Very good read.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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A whole suite of Haikus. Spilling out indeed. They expertly reflect several life challenges and joys as they fall like drops of rain upon a waiting flower pot. Very good read.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing, Treischel. I appreciate your feedback, and I'm glad you enjoyed it. Best wishes and take care. :D :D
Comment from QC Poet
Welcome back, I too was away but for health reasons. So I relate to the feeling of fighting demons in your note. A Great little mix of emotions in this poem I think show through from Happiness to Sad. Thoroughly enjoyed reading and rating this Good Luck on your Future endeavors.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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Welcome back, I too was away but for health reasons. So I relate to the feeling of fighting demons in your note. A Great little mix of emotions in this poem I think show through from Happiness to Sad. Thoroughly enjoyed reading and rating this Good Luck on your Future endeavors.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing, QC Poet. I appreciate your feedback, and I'm thrilled you enjoyed it. I'm sorry to hear about your health issues. I hope you're feeling better. Thank you again for your kind words. Best wishes and take care. :D :D
Comment from Ulla
I am so sorry you're going through this with your Dad. I know how difficult it is to see the decline happening right there in front of your eyes. Please brace yourself for what is to come.
I loved your poem, which showed the contrast in joy and sorrow. A hug, Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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I am so sorry you're going through this with your Dad. I know how difficult it is to see the decline happening right there in front of your eyes. Please brace yourself for what is to come.
I loved your poem, which showed the contrast in joy and sorrow. A hug, Ulla:)))
Comment Written 16-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing Ulla. I appreciate your feedback, and I'm thrilled you enjoyed it. Yes, it'll be a difficult journey, but I'm grateful I still have time with him. Thank you again. Best wishes and take care. :D :D
Comment from Stef Lau
I can feel your dampening within the brightness love. You portray it beautifully! It's almost like a slap- and -stick, that's lives reality. I feel if you went a little further with a little passage to give more depth to the regrets or feelings within, it would've given it a little more depth.
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reply by the author on 16-Jan-2024
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I can feel your dampening within the brightness love. You portray it beautifully! It's almost like a slap- and -stick, that's lives reality. I feel if you went a little further with a little passage to give more depth to the regrets or feelings within, it would've given it a little more depth.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 16-Jan-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing, Stef Lau. I appreciate your feedback. I like your suggestion, but when I wrote these haikus, they depicted one day of events and emotions. My regrets aren't as far as you might think. Regardless, it's a great suggestion and I'll see about incorporating it in this piece or later works. Thank you again. Best wishes and take care. :D :D
Comment from Yusita
This was a unique piece that evoked many different emotions from beginning to end. It effectively conveyed the reality that things can go from amazing and magical to heart-wrenching and dark in a matter of minutes. This was very well-written. However, I'm so very sorry about the condition of your Dad. I will definitely be keeping him as well as you and your family in my prayers. Sending thoughts and hugs your way.
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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This was a unique piece that evoked many different emotions from beginning to end. It effectively conveyed the reality that things can go from amazing and magical to heart-wrenching and dark in a matter of minutes. This was very well-written. However, I'm so very sorry about the condition of your Dad. I will definitely be keeping him as well as you and your family in my prayers. Sending thoughts and hugs your way.
Comment Written 16-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing, Yusita. I appreciate your feedback and your prayers--really appreciate them. Best wishes and take care. :D :D
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
I totally understand how you feel, and I can sympathise with you. This is the one part of our lives that we have no control of. Having lost my youngest brother last November, when it truly wasn't his time in my eyes, but was in his and God's eyes, does suffocate you with intense sadness. I do hope your father pulls through for a while longer and that you can use that time to say and do all the things you you meant to before it's too late. My prayers are with you, my friend. Warmest hugs. Sandra xx
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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I totally understand how you feel, and I can sympathise with you. This is the one part of our lives that we have no control of. Having lost my youngest brother last November, when it truly wasn't his time in my eyes, but was in his and God's eyes, does suffocate you with intense sadness. I do hope your father pulls through for a while longer and that you can use that time to say and do all the things you you meant to before it's too late. My prayers are with you, my friend. Warmest hugs. Sandra xx
Comment Written 16-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 17-Jan-2024
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Thank you for reading and reviewing, Sandra. I appreciate your feedback and prayers--really appreciate those. I'm so sorry to hear about your brother. *sending you love and prayers as well* Thank you again for your kind words. I hope he does, too. Best wishes and take care. :D :D
