Death, Crimes and Misdemeanors A-Z
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "Nobody's Home"Nefarious Deeds
23 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Karen,
This is an ironically funny story. It seems Calvin in so interested in practical jokes he doesn't take all their effects into account. He should have thought how much pain answering the door so many times would cost her. Maybe if she sat near enough to the door she could have screamed to each of the knockers the this was one of Calvin's practical jokes and the people would have gotten mad and took it out on him.
It seems she really ended up killing him when she was just pretending to. Now they can really have the funeral which is already set up.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Congrats on the honorable mention in the contest.
Have a good day.
Joan
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2024
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Hi Karen,
This is an ironically funny story. It seems Calvin in so interested in practical jokes he doesn't take all their effects into account. He should have thought how much pain answering the door so many times would cost her. Maybe if she sat near enough to the door she could have screamed to each of the knockers the this was one of Calvin's practical jokes and the people would have gotten mad and took it out on him.
It seems she really ended up killing him when she was just pretending to. Now they can really have the funeral which is already set up.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Congrats on the honorable mention in the contest.
Have a good day.
Joan
Comment Written 29-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2024
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I never knew they gave honorable mentions. Thanks for the read and kind remarks. I am thinking about writing a contest called" Let's kill Karen" you can kill me with kindness, roll me over with a steam roller, have me fighting with my support hose and tumbling down the stairs, but it must make me laugh.
I have mentioned it to others and they said they would be happy to kill me. Is that a bad thing? Karen
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You're welcome, Karen. I think they do it for very close contests. Those they had a hard time picking out who placed third. That's a weird kind of contest but it may be fun to read the entries.
Joan
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Oh well, it was kind of a difficult contest for me. Someone telling me what my first line is. In my opinion it can make or break the story.
I stopped sn started several times. Thank you for reading me. Karen
Comment from Barry Penfold
Ha Ha. A very clever piece. Calvin was certainly a prankster of some note, and I love your lines that he must have his erogenous zone on his head. Much shorter than mine which I believe is a big plus. More appealing to readers. All the best in the competition but I will still take your claim that I had a better twist. Just.
Take care and have a wonderful day.
Cheers
Barry Penfold
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2024
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Ha Ha. A very clever piece. Calvin was certainly a prankster of some note, and I love your lines that he must have his erogenous zone on his head. Much shorter than mine which I believe is a big plus. More appealing to readers. All the best in the competition but I will still take your claim that I had a better twist. Just.
Take care and have a wonderful day.
Cheers
Barry Penfold
Comment Written 23-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jan-2024
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We will see who they prefer.:-) Karen
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Yes. Let the twist battle begin.
Cheers : Barry
Comment from tempeste
Ciao!
Some pranksters have to learn the hard way..they never understand when: enough is enough.
You do have a very vivid imagination .. halfway through the story the reader knew you were setting up Calvin's fake death ...but the twist that followed was the cherry on the cake....sorry icing ( in Italian we say tiny cherry).
The unexpected outcome is what earned you my 6-star review.
PS. Faking someone's death most probably would be considered a misdemeanour and you most probably would have got off with a big fine,
but when you pressed the button and made the head turn giving Calvin a heart attack, at that point you committed a felony.
You would have ended up doing jail time...so Calvin alas still got the last laugh.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2024
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Ciao!
Some pranksters have to learn the hard way..they never understand when: enough is enough.
You do have a very vivid imagination .. halfway through the story the reader knew you were setting up Calvin's fake death ...but the twist that followed was the cherry on the cake....sorry icing ( in Italian we say tiny cherry).
The unexpected outcome is what earned you my 6-star review.
PS. Faking someone's death most probably would be considered a misdemeanour and you most probably would have got off with a big fine,
but when you pressed the button and made the head turn giving Calvin a heart attack, at that point you committed a felony.
You would have ended up doing jail time...so Calvin alas still got the last laugh.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2024
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I am not sure where this idea came from. but. once I got started, it just grew on it's own. I appreciate the six stars, they are so pretty and shiny. Am I vain? Thanks for your read, your comments, and your stars. Karen
Comment from BethShelby
You have a diabolically creative mind that often takes one of your character out. Your story as much fun to read as a horror story can be. You luck in the contest. This one will be unique.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
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You have a diabolically creative mind that often takes one of your character out. Your story as much fun to read as a horror story can be. You luck in the contest. This one will be unique.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
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I can't seem to write a truly gory one. My humor will not let me. When I want to have a bad man chasing someone with an axe, the axe starts wobbling and knocks himself out. Thanks for the read and kindness. Karen
Comment from scongrove
Oh my gosh! :) This was a good story. It really got me at the end. I wasn't expecting that to happen. Your stories are really interesting with a twist in the end. I like that!
Great writing as always, my friend :)
Thanks for sharing. And I'm going to a funeral today. How ironic.
Sincerely,
Shana :)
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
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Oh my gosh! :) This was a good story. It really got me at the end. I wasn't expecting that to happen. Your stories are really interesting with a twist in the end. I like that!
Great writing as always, my friend :)
Thanks for sharing. And I'm going to a funeral today. How ironic.
Sincerely,
Shana :)
Comment Written 20-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
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I am not really psychic you know. I am sorry for your loss. At these times I remember they have no more pain of any kind. Love to you and your friends and family.Karen
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Thank you, my friend :)
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keep writing your good stuff. I hope someone comes on this site from a publishing house and sees your stuff, and has to have it. Your stuff is plenty good. :-) Karen
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Thank you!!! :)
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And while they are gobbling up your stuff, can you direct them my way? After you have your signed contract first of course. We are friends, but you do not need to be silly about it. Karen
:-)
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If I make it someday, I'll take you with me. :)
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Thanks, you are a pal! If someone shows up to offer me obscene amounts of money for my work, after I get my contract, I'll tell them to snap you up too. Friends to the bitter end! hahaha :-) Karen
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That's right! :) We have to look out for each other's backs.
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OOOOOOh, that icon picture is even better. Both menacing and strong. Karen
Comment from Nicki Nance
This was so much fun to read from beginning to end. Your imagery puts the reader close to the action. The story itself is cautionary tale. Thanks for the morning chuckle.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
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This was so much fun to read from beginning to end. Your imagery puts the reader close to the action. The story itself is cautionary tale. Thanks for the morning chuckle.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
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I haven't seen you before. Thanks for the read and nice comments. Most of my writing tends to have humor with a twist. :-) Karen
Comment from Gunner Lil
This is a cute, flash short, story with a bit of humor at the end. An easy read with good sensory descriptions. A good flow and pace.
Thank you and good luck.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
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This is a cute, flash short, story with a bit of humor at the end. An easy read with good sensory descriptions. A good flow and pace.
Thank you and good luck.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2024
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I appreciate the read and pleasant comments. We all like to win stuff, ribbons are SHINY! But, I write because I have to, or I will lose my mind.
:-) Karen
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
Oh my gosh, Karen, this was hilarious, in a morbid sort of way, lol!! I would say that would certainly get the stinker back for his constant pranks, but I guess it did go a bit far.
Thanks for the smile. You have a very engaging style of writing!!
Hugs,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2024
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Oh my gosh, Karen, this was hilarious, in a morbid sort of way, lol!! I would say that would certainly get the stinker back for his constant pranks, but I guess it did go a bit far.
Thanks for the smile. You have a very engaging style of writing!!
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment Written 19-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2024
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Thank you so much, I appreciate the read and kind words. Karen
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You are most entirely welcome, my friend!
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Have a good week. Karen
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Thank you so much, Karen, you too! I also thank you for all the work you've put into reading my back chapters. That is so very helpful.
Hugs,
Rhonda
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I will get back to reading after I have enough points for promote Miss Him.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Thank you for sharing this contest entry with me. I enjoyed reading. It sort of reminded me of the scene from the musical, "Oklahoma" where Jed walks in on his funeral where they're singing, "Poor Jed is Dead." My only suggestion would be to use some contractions to make it sound more natural as if it's being told. People usually speak in contractions. Good luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2024
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Thank you for sharing this contest entry with me. I enjoyed reading. It sort of reminded me of the scene from the musical, "Oklahoma" where Jed walks in on his funeral where they're singing, "Poor Jed is Dead." My only suggestion would be to use some contractions to make it sound more natural as if it's being told. People usually speak in contractions. Good luck with the contest.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2024
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I have been watching a lot of English Tv of late. They do not use contractions much. Thanks for the read and nice comments. Karen
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That's probably true. Us Americans have butchered their English. LOL
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I have days when I write like the English, days I write very southern, and days I write a mix. Does that make me multi-lingual? :-) Karen
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Of course it makes you bilingual. LOL
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Have a good weekend. Karen
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You too. HUGS!!!
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:-)
Comment from prettybluebirds
Excellent story. I loved the twist at the end, and I never expected it. The story is nothing less than brilliant and very creative. I wish you tons of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2024
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Excellent story. I loved the twist at the end, and I never expected it. The story is nothing less than brilliant and very creative. I wish you tons of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2024
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Thanks a whole bunch again. Seeing this twice is good for my Ego. Karen :-)