A Particular Friendship
Viewing comments for Chapter 40 "A Big Change"We meet Lizzy who has just come out of the convent
10 total reviews
Comment from Pamusart
Hi, Liz. I really enjoyed both pieces of writing. I am on hiatus from writing my own Autobiography. I like the tell tale style you have. I only got through sixth
Grade. Have no memories before age three. Very entertaining. I guess I did not know who was accompanying you on these laughscapades but maybe previous chapters told us
Keep writing and take care
reply by the author on 06-May-2024
  |
Hi, Liz. I really enjoyed both pieces of writing. I am on hiatus from writing my own Autobiography. I like the tell tale style you have. I only got through sixth
Grade. Have no memories before age three. Very entertaining. I guess I did not know who was accompanying you on these laughscapades but maybe previous chapters told us
Keep writing and take care
Comment Written 06-May-2024
reply by the author on 06-May-2024
-
Welcome, nice to meet you.Thank you for your delightful review. If you want to peek at any of my previous chapters you're welcome to and you do not need to write a review. 1st of all I wrote this 20+ years ago. I'm reading stuff I don't remember happening. I just want you to be able to enjoy it. It starts when I came out of the convent and somehow segways into different themes and the more recent were Sweaters, & Candy & now it it school & it will move to teaching. .
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
I love your stories that share a glimpse into the your journey through grade six. It is written with humor and a little bit of mischief. Your stories offer snapshots of childhood experiences. I love how you blend humor and a hint of the uncanny to create interesting stories that I could relate to. Your storytelling is excellent! We are transported back to the enchanting world of adolescence, where each day brings new adventures and mysteries to unravel. Great job!
reply by the author on 05-May-2024
|
I love your stories that share a glimpse into the your journey through grade six. It is written with humor and a little bit of mischief. Your stories offer snapshots of childhood experiences. I love how you blend humor and a hint of the uncanny to create interesting stories that I could relate to. Your storytelling is excellent! We are transported back to the enchanting world of adolescence, where each day brings new adventures and mysteries to unravel. Great job!
Comment Written 05-May-2024
reply by the author on 05-May-2024
-
Wow what an exclusive review you gave me. Thank you so much.
Comment from LateBloomer
Hi Liz, the 6th grade can be tough on teachers. God bless them. This was a fun story, and you did a goo job narrating it. Of special note:
-- When I was teaching 6-8th grade, I learned how difficult it was to restrain myself from laughing at the class comedian, and yet probably not the best idea.
(I have witnessed teachers who have done the same thing--laugh, or try to hide their laughter. Let's admit it, some of these kids were really funny. I still laugh and smile when I think of some of my past class clowns.)
-- We certainly wouldn't want to let all those backhand writing people out into society. What would become of this world?
(Equal opportunity for everyone!)
--We became her constant companions night after night.
(Be careful what you ask for because a person just might get it!)
--We were either laughing, chatting, or turning around in our seats when we were supposed to be attentive to our assignment and quietly doing our work.
(I witness the above in my younger son's classroom--all the talking, jittering around, and one boy sitting on top of the desk. I couldn't believe my eyes. I found the room distracting, and I was only there to observe. The Sisters that I had when I was in school would have either pulled the desk-sitter by his ear (or tie) and put the fear of God into him while shoving him into his seat, then crack the yardstick or pointer across some desk, or do something that had some type of violence associated with it. Those were the day, my dear Liz.)
--Once onto the pavement, we were bent over laughing hysterically.
(I could see the whole scene. Good descriptive writing.)
Regarding "Two." Your writing was very good, lots of good descriptive writing, and it was high in sensory appeal. Saving that writing was a good save!
Well done; well told. A pleasure to read. This story made me smile, and it brought back a lot of my own memories. Margaret
reply by the author on 02-May-2024
 |
Hi Liz, the 6th grade can be tough on teachers. God bless them. This was a fun story, and you did a goo job narrating it. Of special note:
-- When I was teaching 6-8th grade, I learned how difficult it was to restrain myself from laughing at the class comedian, and yet probably not the best idea.
(I have witnessed teachers who have done the same thing--laugh, or try to hide their laughter. Let's admit it, some of these kids were really funny. I still laugh and smile when I think of some of my past class clowns.)
-- We certainly wouldn't want to let all those backhand writing people out into society. What would become of this world?
(Equal opportunity for everyone!)
--We became her constant companions night after night.
(Be careful what you ask for because a person just might get it!)
--We were either laughing, chatting, or turning around in our seats when we were supposed to be attentive to our assignment and quietly doing our work.
(I witness the above in my younger son's classroom--all the talking, jittering around, and one boy sitting on top of the desk. I couldn't believe my eyes. I found the room distracting, and I was only there to observe. The Sisters that I had when I was in school would have either pulled the desk-sitter by his ear (or tie) and put the fear of God into him while shoving him into his seat, then crack the yardstick or pointer across some desk, or do something that had some type of violence associated with it. Those were the day, my dear Liz.)
--Once onto the pavement, we were bent over laughing hysterically.
(I could see the whole scene. Good descriptive writing.)
Regarding "Two." Your writing was very good, lots of good descriptive writing, and it was high in sensory appeal. Saving that writing was a good save!
Well done; well told. A pleasure to read. This story made me smile, and it brought back a lot of my own memories. Margaret
Comment Written 01-May-2024
reply by the author on 02-May-2024
-
Thank you for your glowing review and I just noticed there's a shiny six thank you. I'm glad you enjoyed it so much.
Comment from lyenochka
Thanks for sharing and I think I would not have made it with a class of acting out middle schoolers! I think hormones also make the kids tend to guffaw even for no reason.
I especially liked your final paragraph - shows talent indeed!
"We were the proverbial lemmings as we mindlessly tramped over our already plenty-tattered piece of cardboard which served as third base on our softball field, taking no mind of the dog deposits as we reached our soccer field. Flowing forward in a mesmerized mass, we wondered what was beyond us...waiting. "
reply by the author on 02-May-2024
|
Thanks for sharing and I think I would not have made it with a class of acting out middle schoolers! I think hormones also make the kids tend to guffaw even for no reason.
I especially liked your final paragraph - shows talent indeed!
"We were the proverbial lemmings as we mindlessly tramped over our already plenty-tattered piece of cardboard which served as third base on our softball field, taking no mind of the dog deposits as we reached our soccer field. Flowing forward in a mesmerized mass, we wondered what was beyond us...waiting. "
Comment Written 01-May-2024
reply by the author on 02-May-2024
-
Thank you for your positive review. I'm glad you didn't you enjoyed it as much as you did.
Comment from patcelaw
This is a very well written chapter and I enjoyed very much listening to it. It flows very well when it is read aloud your sentence structure your paragraphing and your presentation are very good. Have a good day and may God bless you. Patricia .
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
|
This is a very well written chapter and I enjoyed very much listening to it. It flows very well when it is read aloud your sentence structure your paragraphing and your presentation are very good. Have a good day and may God bless you. Patricia .
Comment Written 30-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
-
Thank you for your complimentary review. I'm glad you are enjoying my chapters. I pretty well have no idea what is in the future as I have mentioned, I wrote this well over 20 years ago.
Comment from jim vecchio
I sure wish I had a six now. Sorry, but this was great. I was always an unwelcome guest in the Principal's office, and I don't have any samples of my earlier writing. I do remember one teacher said I was "an up and coming Eugene O' Neill" which shows how wrong someone can be.
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
|
I sure wish I had a six now. Sorry, but this was great. I was always an unwelcome guest in the Principal's office, and I don't have any samples of my earlier writing. I do remember one teacher said I was "an up and coming Eugene O' Neill" which shows how wrong someone can be.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
-
She must have seen some strain of your writing that sounded like Eugene O'Neill. I have told some people they sounded like Steinbeck or Jack London. I don't know enough about Eugene O'Neill to know what his style would be. I do think as I was reading my 8th grade writing it has Steinbeck style to it that I absolutely love in his beginning chapter of Cannery Row. I was sure someone was going to say I had run on sentences because that's what Steinbeck does in this first paragraph of this.
****
here is his first paragraph Whoa wouldn't then ones who like to criticize run on sentences have a ball with this one:
******
Cannery Row in Monterey in California is a poem, a stink,
a grating noise, a quality of light, a tone, a habit, a nostalgia,
a dream. Cannery Row is the gathered and scattered, tin
and iron and rust and splintered wood, chipped pavement
and weedy lots and junk-heaps, sardine canneries of corru-
gated iron, honky-tonks, restaurants and whore-houses, and
little crowded groceries, and laboratories and flop-houses. Its
inhabitants are, as the man once said, "whores, pimps,
gamblers, and sons of bitches," by which he meant Every-
body. Had the man looked through another peep-hole he
might have said : "Saints and angels and martyrs and holy
men," and he would have meant the same thing. *****
I do love this
-
Every writer has his own style and the example you gave is perfect for Steinbeck. I don't know if I have a definite style but lately it seems to be simple words in small paragraphs, though I love Steinbeck's example.
-
What does Eugene O'Neill write like? Ever explored that.?
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Great cliff hanger ending, and very good writing as an eighth grader. No teacher wants a class that misbehaves in a silly manner. It's exhausting, but it makes for a memorable year for the class.
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
|
Great cliff hanger ending, and very good writing as an eighth grader. No teacher wants a class that misbehaves in a silly manner. It's exhausting, but it makes for a memorable year for the class.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
-
Thank you for your confirming review. I look back and wonder what I would have done if I had that class of kids. I did have one group that was very. I did have a hard time not laughing with them. And I guess I've had a class that we might call out of control. bwaaa
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Just a reminder that dialogue needs to be separated by a space. Thank you for sharing this addition with us. I enjoyed reading.
, I learned how difficult it was to restrain myself from laughing at the class comedian, and yet probably not the best idea. (Often while teaching first grade, especially, my little boys would do absolutely hilarious things and I would have to restrain from laughing while talking with them.)
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
|
Just a reminder that dialogue needs to be separated by a space. Thank you for sharing this addition with us. I enjoyed reading.
, I learned how difficult it was to restrain myself from laughing at the class comedian, and yet probably not the best idea. (Often while teaching first grade, especially, my little boys would do absolutely hilarious things and I would have to restrain from laughing while talking with them.)
Comment Written 30-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
-
Thank you for your delightful review Oh yes I had one year my first year thinking of first graders Hey were hilarious, without even working at it. Thanks for sharing that.
Comment from BethShelby
I enjoyed reading this. You sounded like a pretty happy kid with all the friends you had to laugh and act out with. I had friends in school but I always envied the more lively ones the were laughting and misbehaving and seemingly having more fun that we were. Your eight greade writing is very good. Actually our whole class acted out in eighth grade. We had a teacher that couldn't handle us. When I did practice teaching with 7th, 8th and 9th graders, it was the 8th grade class that was hardest to handle.
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
|
I enjoyed reading this. You sounded like a pretty happy kid with all the friends you had to laugh and act out with. I had friends in school but I always envied the more lively ones the were laughting and misbehaving and seemingly having more fun that we were. Your eight greade writing is very good. Actually our whole class acted out in eighth grade. We had a teacher that couldn't handle us. When I did practice teaching with 7th, 8th and 9th graders, it was the 8th grade class that was hardest to handle.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
-
Thank you for your delightful review. I always taught sixth grade and then I found myself having to teach 7th and 8th but it was at a Catholic school so I think I was lucky there. They were well behaved. And then I actually was teaching freshman & sophomores in the Catholic High School. I was kind of terrified but it turned out a lot of them were kids I'd had in the 6th grade and they were mature and doing fine.
Comment from isabelteeth
I love this. You explore what I assume to be yourself incredibly artistically. If it's not autobiographical (I confess to not having read the previous chapters) I am even more impressed. It's hard enough getting into one's own head.
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
|
I love this. You explore what I assume to be yourself incredibly artistically. If it's not autobiographical (I confess to not having read the previous chapters) I am even more impressed. It's hard enough getting into one's own head.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2024
-
Thank you for your delightful review. Hello, nice to meet you. I wrote these chapters over 20 years ago so now I'm finding things I don't even really remember but it's fun cuz I wrote it, it must have happened. Please feel free to look at any of my other previous chapters. There's no need to write any review just enjoy them. Some are quite funny and some are little dark. This whole thing begins with me leaving the convent but then at goes into themes. So I kind of write in themes not any chronological pattern.
