The Wonder of a Child
Through the eyes of a child contest entry4 total reviews
Comment from Esther Brown
Really thought you did well with the thoughts of a child until the ending. I somehow thought you were describing when you run and play at recess. Reread it, and realized you were sharing a lot of different experiences. I would have liked it to stop after playground since you did not mention recess previously. Just a thought...good luck.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2024
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Really thought you did well with the thoughts of a child until the ending. I somehow thought you were describing when you run and play at recess. Reread it, and realized you were sharing a lot of different experiences. I would have liked it to stop after playground since you did not mention recess previously. Just a thought...good luck.
Comment Written 17-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2024
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Dear Esther, thank you for your comments and review. Dove
Comment from samantha0930
This is very nice, and certainly is in a child's perspective, but the prompt says to write a story, and this is more like several ideas listed after one another, and doesn't really have a story structure. It feels much more like a poem. I think if you formatted it into a poem instead of it being written like a paragraph, then it would be a really good poem :) But if idk if you could change it since it is for a contest. The rules don't say that poetry isn't allowed like some other contests do, but idk if it would be disqualified for not following the rules if you did turn it into a poem. I do like this, and it's written very well, but it doesn't really feel like a story to me.
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2024
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This is very nice, and certainly is in a child's perspective, but the prompt says to write a story, and this is more like several ideas listed after one another, and doesn't really have a story structure. It feels much more like a poem. I think if you formatted it into a poem instead of it being written like a paragraph, then it would be a really good poem :) But if idk if you could change it since it is for a contest. The rules don't say that poetry isn't allowed like some other contests do, but idk if it would be disqualified for not following the rules if you did turn it into a poem. I do like this, and it's written very well, but it doesn't really feel like a story to me.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2024
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Hi samantha, thank you for your comments and review. Dove
Comment from jessizero
This was a great description of a scene seen through the eyes of a child. I liked all of your similes. Thank you so much for sharing, and best wishes to you.
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2024
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This was a great description of a scene seen through the eyes of a child. I liked all of your similes. Thank you so much for sharing, and best wishes to you.
Comment Written 16-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2024
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Dear jessizero, Thank you for your comments and review.
Comment from iDri.Luv.Jesus
I like your Prompt Writing in "The Wonder of a Child," it got the message across to the reader(s) like me. It's simple, easy to understand writing, but yet it got a meaningful simile too which I love. Your artwork choice is great, it matches with your story telling too. Best of luck to your awesome piece, and I hope it win!
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2024
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I like your Prompt Writing in "The Wonder of a Child," it got the message across to the reader(s) like me. It's simple, easy to understand writing, but yet it got a meaningful simile too which I love. Your artwork choice is great, it matches with your story telling too. Best of luck to your awesome piece, and I hope it win!
Comment Written 16-Jul-2024
reply by the author on 16-Jul-2024
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hi iDri.Luv.Jesus, thank you for your comments and review.
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You're welcome, and I am glad to read your fun enjoyable writing!