Detour
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "Runaway Horse and Venomous Snake"Two very real women in not so real situation.
27 total reviews
Comment from Jim Wile
It's a good thing for all your knowledge about farm animals and farm life, otherwise, you may also have been knocked down and trampled by those rampaging horses. Never a dull moment around there. Makes me wonder if you'll ever escape the place and make it to the convention. I'll be there, and I'd miss you if you don't make it.
I enjoyed the excitement and the humor in this chapter.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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It's a good thing for all your knowledge about farm animals and farm life, otherwise, you may also have been knocked down and trampled by those rampaging horses. Never a dull moment around there. Makes me wonder if you'll ever escape the place and make it to the convention. I'll be there, and I'd miss you if you don't make it.
I enjoyed the excitement and the humor in this chapter.
Comment Written 08-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Thank you!! I so appreciate your feedback and support, as well as having you along every step of this adventure!! xoxox
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Great. See you at the convention--if you make it!
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Hahahaha.
Comment from LJbutterfly
I never knew horses ran in a straight line. I say that as though I knew other things about horses. Not! The thing that makes these stories interesting to me, is that you're allowing me to imagine things, based on your descriptions, that I would never see or experience. I liked the humorous line about the horses already arriving at the FanStory Convention. Great episode.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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I never knew horses ran in a straight line. I say that as though I knew other things about horses. Not! The thing that makes these stories interesting to me, is that you're allowing me to imagine things, based on your descriptions, that I would never see or experience. I liked the humorous line about the horses already arriving at the FanStory Convention. Great episode.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Well, think of plowing, racing, etc. It's just how they're designed. A cougar, though, if you're running, chases you. You could run a figure eight, he'll still chase you. horses are linear.
I love having you along on this adventure and always look forward to your review. xoxox Thank you for this one.
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
You've done it, another exciting and humorous chapter. I love it. I'm happy nobody got hurt severely.
I find the Amish culture fascinating and you do an excellent job taking us on a tour through Amish living.
Well done!
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2024
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You've done it, another exciting and humorous chapter. I love it. I'm happy nobody got hurt severely.
I find the Amish culture fascinating and you do an excellent job taking us on a tour through Amish living.
Well done!
Comment Written 07-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2024
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Thank you very much, Gypsy. I always love your feedback. xoxo
Comment from Michele Harber
While this was perfectly interesting and well-written, I have to say, honestly, that I found this the least engaging of the chapters so far. I suspect that's because, due to the seriousness of the rampaging horses and the venomous snake, this chapter had much less interspersed humor. The problem is that you have an excellent sense of humor that I've come to expect in these stories.
You did hit the mark on things like suggesting the runaway horses "are already at the FanStory Convention," and saying that Amish country was proving "more action-packed than anything I've ever experienced in humble little East Rochester, New York!"
There were also a couple of places, though, where you missed the mark, not including a joke where you'd clearly left room for one. For instance, instead of just saying, "sends her streaking faster and more nimbly into the meadows to our right than I could ever have fathomed," you could have said, i.e., "than Secretariat," or "than my boyfriend when my husband came home unexpectedly." And "though I can't imagine anyone having an appetite at this point" could easily have been followed up by something like, "though, for some good Amish flapjacks and homemade maple syrup, I might be persuaded."
As I said, I know this chapter dealt with some more serious (and dangerous) issues, but you did set up a certain expectation of humor in your previous chapters, and I would have appreciated more of that in this one.
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2024
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While this was perfectly interesting and well-written, I have to say, honestly, that I found this the least engaging of the chapters so far. I suspect that's because, due to the seriousness of the rampaging horses and the venomous snake, this chapter had much less interspersed humor. The problem is that you have an excellent sense of humor that I've come to expect in these stories.
You did hit the mark on things like suggesting the runaway horses "are already at the FanStory Convention," and saying that Amish country was proving "more action-packed than anything I've ever experienced in humble little East Rochester, New York!"
There were also a couple of places, though, where you missed the mark, not including a joke where you'd clearly left room for one. For instance, instead of just saying, "sends her streaking faster and more nimbly into the meadows to our right than I could ever have fathomed," you could have said, i.e., "than Secretariat," or "than my boyfriend when my husband came home unexpectedly." And "though I can't imagine anyone having an appetite at this point" could easily have been followed up by something like, "though, for some good Amish flapjacks and homemade maple syrup, I might be persuaded."
As I said, I know this chapter dealt with some more serious (and dangerous) issues, but you did set up a certain expectation of humor in your previous chapters, and I would have appreciated more of that in this one.
Comment Written 07-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2024
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Gretchen picked up a lot of the one-liners this time; I don't like to feel like we're trying to one-up the other (for example, she referred to her fast running as her being Usain Bolt going for the gold medal.) But I do see your point and will keep that in mind as I move forward! Thank you.
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You're welcome. I know it wasn't quite the review you were hoping for, but I can't be helpful if I'm not honest.
Comment from Daylily
I wanted to weep I am so far behind in reviewing again. However, reading this is energizing and encouraging because it expresses such believable emotion. -- I do feel the need to apologize for all these E words that just came out of nowhere like a frenzied bat. But I digress...From runaway horses to Timber rattlers, you know how to pack it all in with just the right sprinkling of humor. Your writings are a top notch read and I love it when you post. Smiles and hugs, Lily
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2024
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I wanted to weep I am so far behind in reviewing again. However, reading this is energizing and encouraging because it expresses such believable emotion. -- I do feel the need to apologize for all these E words that just came out of nowhere like a frenzied bat. But I digress...From runaway horses to Timber rattlers, you know how to pack it all in with just the right sprinkling of humor. Your writings are a top notch read and I love it when you post. Smiles and hugs, Lily
Comment Written 07-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 07-Aug-2024
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Lily, you're hilarious E - E - E "like a frenzied bat." That's very, very funny!! Thank you for the wonderful review and the extra star, as well. Always so appreciated. xoxox
Comment from lyenochka
Oh, I wouldn't think that anyone could eat breakfast after a morning of calamity after calamity! I laughed at the idea of the horses getting to the convention before either of you. Fun story!
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2024
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Oh, I wouldn't think that anyone could eat breakfast after a morning of calamity after calamity! I laughed at the idea of the horses getting to the convention before either of you. Fun story!
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2024
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Thanks, Helen. And I liked the idea of Steve Foreman taming them into submission and charging the members to take rides on them. Gretchen and I are having way too much fun writing this together. I appreciate your feedback. xoxo
Comment from patcelaw
This is another very well Written chapter in the story and I enjoyed very much listening to it. I wish you the very best with all of your writing. I also wish you a very good week and may God bless you. Patricia.
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2024
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This is another very well Written chapter in the story and I enjoyed very much listening to it. I wish you the very best with all of your writing. I also wish you a very good week and may God bless you. Patricia.
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2024
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Thanks, Patricia!!
Comment from T B Botts
Hello Rachelle,
horses are nothing to mess with. I had a few run-ins with them when I was on the farm down in Hoonah. I tried doing the Lone Ranger mount from behind once on an old nag named Marge and she kicked me in the groin and ran off. It took awhile before I could move, but all the parts still worked. In fact, after that incident, Jan got pregnant with twin boys. Prior to that, we had five girls. Maybe it shook things up a bit. Anyway, another great story gal. Is it true that horses run in a strait line? I never noticed.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2024
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Hello Rachelle,
horses are nothing to mess with. I had a few run-ins with them when I was on the farm down in Hoonah. I tried doing the Lone Ranger mount from behind once on an old nag named Marge and she kicked me in the groin and ran off. It took awhile before I could move, but all the parts still worked. In fact, after that incident, Jan got pregnant with twin boys. Prior to that, we had five girls. Maybe it shook things up a bit. Anyway, another great story gal. Is it true that horses run in a strait line? I never noticed.
Have a blessed evening.
Tom
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2024
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Wow, Tom!! What a STORY!! Sheesh!! (though the Jewish Mommie in me wants to remind you that you were more than old enough to know not do to a Lone Ranger mount on your horse.) [It did give me a hearty laugh, though, imagining you in action!] And all's well that ends well - twin boys after five girls? I hope you gave that horse some sugar cubes!!
xoxo
Comment from Esther Brown
Such a fun story! My brother is a retired farmer in upstate NY near Cooperstown. It used to have lots of milk cow farms. Rather than urban sprawl, they invited the Amish farmers to settle there. Now you see them go by on the gravel road outside his farm. He just joined fanstory. Name of Paul Brown. Down home farmer stories and missionary stories from his time in Africa. He would love your story. Esther
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2024
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Such a fun story! My brother is a retired farmer in upstate NY near Cooperstown. It used to have lots of milk cow farms. Rather than urban sprawl, they invited the Amish farmers to settle there. Now you see them go by on the gravel road outside his farm. He just joined fanstory. Name of Paul Brown. Down home farmer stories and missionary stories from his time in Africa. He would love your story. Esther
Comment Written 05-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2024
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Oh, how wonderful to know! I'll look him up; thanks for the tip. Thanks, too, for the warm and wonderful review. xoxox
Comment from Marilyn Hamilton
Timber rattlers and giant horses. Man, this story has everything! Everything but the Amish baked goods I asked for! Is it too much to ask for a whoppie pie or some coffee cake? I will be patient. I'm glad the snake didn't bite anyone. please wear boots from this point forward when going outside. Keep the adventures coming. Nicely done!
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2024
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Timber rattlers and giant horses. Man, this story has everything! Everything but the Amish baked goods I asked for! Is it too much to ask for a whoppie pie or some coffee cake? I will be patient. I'm glad the snake didn't bite anyone. please wear boots from this point forward when going outside. Keep the adventures coming. Nicely done!
Comment Written 05-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 05-Aug-2024
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I was wearing on-loan clod-hopper work boots, which is EXACTLY why Gretchen beat me in that damn foot race. In my stilettos, I'd have trounced that girl. (As you can see, a vivid fantasy life is perpetually in force in my head...)
Thank you for this nice review...and not to worry, something berried and crusty is in the very near future for this novel! Thank you for your patience. xoxo
