Death, Crimes and Misdemeanors A-Z
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Hildegard Hanover "Nefarious Deeds
15 total reviews
Comment from karenina
This is so well written, Karen. The tone rocks back and forth from sentimental/well-intentioned but overbearing parents to --- hmmm,
that trademark Karen vibe makes me sit up and expect something is not quite right... And it isn't right! She had fantasy boyfriends, I'm thinking? I may be wrong, but perhaps the last one was "real" and she was NOT going to let him get away! (Poor man, head over heels or head and heels in the ground?)
What a great read!
Karenina
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2024
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This is so well written, Karen. The tone rocks back and forth from sentimental/well-intentioned but overbearing parents to --- hmmm,
that trademark Karen vibe makes me sit up and expect something is not quite right... And it isn't right! She had fantasy boyfriends, I'm thinking? I may be wrong, but perhaps the last one was "real" and she was NOT going to let him get away! (Poor man, head over heels or head and heels in the ground?)
What a great read!
Karenina
Comment Written 27-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2024
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Yes indeed, The others were figments of her delusions. But, this last one was real. so everyone could see him, and he will never vanish. :-)
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Yay. Sometimes I guess and fall flat on my face...
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You nailed it dear.
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Very clever ending.
He told her, "That he was a professor of languages at Oxford. His limp made him ineligible for service. He felt badly that he could not serve. "
- You don't need the quotation marks or the comma after 'her', or the capitalized 'That'.
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2024
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Very clever ending.
He told her, "That he was a professor of languages at Oxford. His limp made him ineligible for service. He felt badly that he could not serve. "
- You don't need the quotation marks or the comma after 'her', or the capitalized 'That'.
Comment Written 25-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 25-Aug-2024
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I edited thank you. It seemed very Twilight Zone to me.
Thanks for the read. KarenThe title just burst out of my head.
Comment from Bill Schott
This was a fine build to this totally unexpected finish. On second read we can see why her parents were so uninterested in her boyfriends, as she was likely already suspected of killing the other two.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
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This was a fine build to this totally unexpected finish. On second read we can see why her parents were so uninterested in her boyfriends, as she was likely already suspected of killing the other two.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
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No silly, they were imaginary. But he was real and she wanted to keep him from leaving her. How did the operation go? Karen
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She went through it like a champ and is now at her dialysis appointment for three hours. When the incision mends, they will tap that for a while, making sure it is okay, then remove her chest portal.
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Well, I will keep you guys in my thoughts.Karen
Comment from Jim Wile
A sad tale of a beautiful but possibly schizophrenic girl who sees imaginary boyfriends. Her parents probably think she's harmless because they keep going off without her, but now it looks like it will be the loony bin for her because this time, she kills someone to prove to her doubting parents that her boyfriends are real.
Moral of the story: Don't eat gingersnaps. They really aren't a good substitute for something sweet.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
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A sad tale of a beautiful but possibly schizophrenic girl who sees imaginary boyfriends. Her parents probably think she's harmless because they keep going off without her, but now it looks like it will be the loony bin for her because this time, she kills someone to prove to her doubting parents that her boyfriends are real.
Moral of the story: Don't eat gingersnaps. They really aren't a good substitute for something sweet.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
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Thank you for the read and kind words. Karen
Comment from Tom Horonzy
I followed along from beginning to near end but got lost in the last paragraph. Imaginary friend? Or imaginary parents? It flowed quite well everywhere else.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
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I followed along from beginning to near end but got lost in the last paragraph. Imaginary friend? Or imaginary parents? It flowed quite well everywhere else.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
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All her other boyfriends were imaginary. But, the one she poisoned was real . Now her parents can see a real boyfriend. But not for long as she and him will be removed from the premises. Karen
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
She has a serious boyfriend problem. If her parents can't see them, then they must not exist. The only way her parents can see them, she thinks, is if the boyfriend remains there as a corpse.
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
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She has a serious boyfriend problem. If her parents can't see them, then they must not exist. The only way her parents can see them, she thinks, is if the boyfriend remains there as a corpse.
Comment Written 23-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2024
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her other boyfriends were imaginary. This one was real, so, she made sure her parents couls see him. Thanks for the read. Karen
Comment from prettybluebirds
This is a cute and creative story. I love the artwork you chose to portray your main character. The ending took me by surprise, but that is what makes for an exciting read. Nice work.
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
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This is a cute and creative story. I love the artwork you chose to portray your main character. The ending took me by surprise, but that is what makes for an exciting read. Nice work.
Comment Written 22-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
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Thank you so much for the read. Hildegard is a bit quirky isn't she? Karen
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
A charming period story to accompany your image of that beautiful young woman. You clearly had great fun here, Karen. I like your attention to detail with the sugar and the ginger snaps. The mind just has to wander off at times. Then we see that Jonathan will not be escaping the scrutiny of her parents nor offending with his personality.... Well done! Debbie
With your inverted commas speech: He told her and She said - you should either leave out the inverted commas and e.g. say that he was a professor of languages...or use 'I' as the subject within the inverted commas.
The same with She said...at the ripe old age of twenty five I told my parents...
Different spellings for Jonathan. I'd stick to this one rather than Johnathan.
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
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A charming period story to accompany your image of that beautiful young woman. You clearly had great fun here, Karen. I like your attention to detail with the sugar and the ginger snaps. The mind just has to wander off at times. Then we see that Jonathan will not be escaping the scrutiny of her parents nor offending with his personality.... Well done! Debbie
With your inverted commas speech: He told her and She said - you should either leave out the inverted commas and e.g. say that he was a professor of languages...or use 'I' as the subject within the inverted commas.
The same with She said...at the ripe old age of twenty five I told my parents...
Different spellings for Jonathan. I'd stick to this one rather than Johnathan.
Comment Written 22-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
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I edited, thank you. I really thought I got everything. But when I went in I found a couple more! Thanks for the read. Karen
Comment from GoWiSt
"It's a bad day for someone" {Skulking with my obnoxious review--gulp!}
"Hildegard Hanover" ...Henrietta Hudson--full name.
"he wasn't perfect, no man is," Uh, have you met me yet? I truly break the mold.
"She never saw him again." Good for him.
"His body was here but he really wasn't. His lemon water had really packed a punch." Ah yes, another good man bites the dust--at the hands of a fringe female. Women rule!
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
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"It's a bad day for someone" {Skulking with my obnoxious review--gulp!}
"Hildegard Hanover" ...Henrietta Hudson--full name.
"he wasn't perfect, no man is," Uh, have you met me yet? I truly break the mold.
"She never saw him again." Good for him.
"His body was here but he really wasn't. His lemon water had really packed a punch." Ah yes, another good man bites the dust--at the hands of a fringe female. Women rule!
Comment Written 22-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
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I let Harold kill someone off in his little story. And, you did not break the mold, as much as you are covered with it. No good men bite the dust in my stories. Only bad ones. Bad ladies get it too. It's just that there are so many more bad men than bad women :-) Karen
Comment from Brenda Strauser
Karen, ii enjoyed your story
The names of the guys was clever. The story was interesting and very descriptive
Like the ending
Well written. Love, Brenda
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
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Karen, ii enjoyed your story
The names of the guys was clever. The story was interesting and very descriptive
Like the ending
Well written. Love, Brenda
Comment Written 22-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2024
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Thank you so much. I had written it a couple months ago, but I kinda lost it in the move. Found it again, and dusted it off.
I appreciate the read. Karen