I Found a Brother
Son finds he has a brother he never knew.8 total reviews
Comment from BermyBye50
Richard,
Congrats on your win in Found It Contest. Wow! What a compelling story. Is it completely fictional? It reads like it is based on a real story of a seemingly fruitless search for an unknown brother. The ending is brilliant. The unexpected reunion completes the search with a powerful emotional ending.
All the best,
Eugene
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2024
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Richard,
Congrats on your win in Found It Contest. Wow! What a compelling story. Is it completely fictional? It reads like it is based on a real story of a seemingly fruitless search for an unknown brother. The ending is brilliant. The unexpected reunion completes the search with a powerful emotional ending.
All the best,
Eugene
Comment Written 14-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 14-Sep-2024
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Thank you for the extra kind words.
I enjoy writing and when I receive a review like yours I am humbled.
This story is all fictional. I strive to make my stories as real as possible.
Thank you again.
Richard
Comment from tempeste
Ciao mystery writer, you now have 6 votes.
I fell hook,line, and sinker. The characters are so realistic.
I was emotionally engaged from the get-go. When you mentioned the father's cane, chair, and footstool.
Great storytelling. my eyes got all watery when the two brothers hugs each other.
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2024
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Ciao mystery writer, you now have 6 votes.
I fell hook,line, and sinker. The characters are so realistic.
I was emotionally engaged from the get-go. When you mentioned the father's cane, chair, and footstool.
Great storytelling. my eyes got all watery when the two brothers hugs each other.
Comment Written 09-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 09-Sep-2024
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Thank you so much for the very kind words and the vote. I appreciate both.
Writing brings a joy to my life. People like you give me reason to keep writing. For that I thank you,
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Congratulations on your well deserved win!
🍾 🏆🥂
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Thank you soooo much!!!!!
I do have another story you may want to read. "My Brother, Me, and Vietnam"
I had several reviewers think it was non-fiction. So, I added a line at the end that the story was fiction.
Thank you again
Comment from Brenda Strauser
I enjoyed reading your story. It was so interesting and well written. The story described everything so vividly. It was very easy to follow along. Good luck with the contest. Great story
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I enjoyed reading your story. It was so interesting and well written. The story described everything so vividly. It was very easy to follow along. Good luck with the contest. Great story
Comment Written 01-Sep-2024
Comment from Nebuli
This is a wonderful story filled with delicate and impactful details! I love your mention of the father's "Irish smile" and the tenderness with which you describe the main character's relationship to his parents. There are a few typos here and there and places where I wish you could draw out the story more. Obviously you had a word count but maybe you can continue it in your personal writing! I know I seem nitpicky but I only bring up these points because this such a good story that I can tell you are passionate about. Friction improves the work (which I think might be a quote from Spider-Man lol but it's true). Wonderful job and happy writing!! I hope to read more from you in the future.
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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This is a wonderful story filled with delicate and impactful details! I love your mention of the father's "Irish smile" and the tenderness with which you describe the main character's relationship to his parents. There are a few typos here and there and places where I wish you could draw out the story more. Obviously you had a word count but maybe you can continue it in your personal writing! I know I seem nitpicky but I only bring up these points because this such a good story that I can tell you are passionate about. Friction improves the work (which I think might be a quote from Spider-Man lol but it's true). Wonderful job and happy writing!! I hope to read more from you in the future.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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First, I appreciate your reading my story and the gracious comments.
Your advice helps me become a better writer.
Thank you
Comment from Begin Again
You had a very good story. My husband was in his thirties before he found out he was adopted. After investigating, he discovered he had four brothers and a sister. Some things went well and others did not, but then I guess you can't always rock the boat.
It was difficult to read the story because of the small print and that it was all written as one paragraph. If you want more reviewers, I suggest you set your story up a little differently.
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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You had a very good story. My husband was in his thirties before he found out he was adopted. After investigating, he discovered he had four brothers and a sister. Some things went well and others did not, but then I guess you can't always rock the boat.
It was difficult to read the story because of the small print and that it was all written as one paragraph. If you want more reviewers, I suggest you set your story up a little differently.
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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I have been away from FanStory for a while. Need to get back into things.
I just submitted a new story could let me know if this one is better.
When I get reviews I always a reviewers suggestions.
If no one says anything you keep making the same mistakes.
Thank you again for reading my story. Your suggestions are appreciated. I have been away from FanStory for a while, need to get back in swing.
All to often I have found reviewers well comment on the story while saying nothing about errors they found.
Thank you.
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
You have a very good story, Mystery Writer. I see it's in a competition. Before it goes to vote, you might want to look at some of the other stories on this site. We tend to break passages up into multiple paragraphs and skip line between them. This helps many on here with sight issues.
Good luck in the contest,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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You have a very good story, Mystery Writer. I see it's in a competition. Before it goes to vote, you might want to look at some of the other stories on this site. We tend to break passages up into multiple paragraphs and skip line between them. This helps many on here with sight issues.
Good luck in the contest,
Rhonda
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2024
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Rhonda,
Thank you for not only reading this story, but letting me know problems you find.
If no one ever brings a problem to the writers attention. They will keep making the same mistakes.
Thank you !!!
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Someone did it for me, too, and with the same respect I passed it on to you!
Comment from zanya
Yes a story told complete with a happy ending which are rare enough these days - finding a sibling must be truly filled with a sense of joy -and homecoming.
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2024
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Yes a story told complete with a happy ending which are rare enough these days - finding a sibling must be truly filled with a sense of joy -and homecoming.
Comment Written 28-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 28-Aug-2024
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Thank you so much for the kind words. Your review is appreciated.
Comment from Patty Mazzurco
I really like your story; it reminds me of when I found out I had a brother. I remember being most surprised by how many things we had in common. Your story is heartfelt and compelling, beautifully weaving together themes of love, loss, and the unexpected discoveries that come with exploring a loved one's past. The emotional weight of your father's death and the memories tied to his home are vividly conveyed, setting the stage for the profound journey that follows.
The discovery of the letter and photograph is a powerful turning point, sparking a deep curiosity to uncover this hidden chapter of your father's life. Your decision-making process, supported by your wife, feels personal and real, reflecting your honest uncertainty about what to do next.
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2024
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I really like your story; it reminds me of when I found out I had a brother. I remember being most surprised by how many things we had in common. Your story is heartfelt and compelling, beautifully weaving together themes of love, loss, and the unexpected discoveries that come with exploring a loved one's past. The emotional weight of your father's death and the memories tied to his home are vividly conveyed, setting the stage for the profound journey that follows.
The discovery of the letter and photograph is a powerful turning point, sparking a deep curiosity to uncover this hidden chapter of your father's life. Your decision-making process, supported by your wife, feels personal and real, reflecting your honest uncertainty about what to do next.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2024
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Patty,
Thank you for the very kind words. When I retired several years ago. I needed something to keep me busy. Writing was something I enjoyed, but never had the time. Honestly, I still cannot believe people such as you enjoy my writing. Reviews like yours mean the world to me. Thank you.