The Unseen Battle
A short poem about battling depression.5 total reviews
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Being bed bound is not a pleasant experience and we yearn to well again. I always look forward to my rest in bed, but would not like to be lying down all the time. I enjoyed your inventive poem and welcome to Fanstory, love Dolly x
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Being bed bound is not a pleasant experience and we yearn to well again. I always look forward to my rest in bed, but would not like to be lying down all the time. I enjoyed your inventive poem and welcome to Fanstory, love Dolly x
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
Comment from royowen
Well done with your first poet, welcome to fanstory, you'll enjoy it here. I'm not very good at the loop format, you've done very well at it, congratulations, well done, good luck, blessings Roy
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Well done with your first poet, welcome to fanstory, you'll enjoy it here. I'm not very good at the loop format, you've done very well at it, congratulations, well done, good luck, blessings Roy
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
Comment from Bill Schott
This loop poem, The Unseen Battle, has the proper formatting and seems to find the now invalid person realizing that the simplicities of yesterday are now the challenges every day.
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This loop poem, The Unseen Battle, has the proper formatting and seems to find the now invalid person realizing that the simplicities of yesterday are now the challenges every day.
Comment Written 29-Aug-2024
Comment from Patty Mazzurco
Your loop poem powerfully conveys a sense of struggle and emotional confinement. The repetition of words like "bed" and "fine" emphasizes the tension between the appearance of normalcy and the internal reality of pain and stagnation. The imagery of the bed as a "gilded cage" is particularly striking, illustrating how comfort can sometimes become a trap.
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Your loop poem powerfully conveys a sense of struggle and emotional confinement. The repetition of words like "bed" and "fine" emphasizes the tension between the appearance of normalcy and the internal reality of pain and stagnation. The imagery of the bed as a "gilded cage" is particularly striking, illustrating how comfort can sometimes become a trap.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2024
Comment from Jacob1395
Sometimes we all have those days when we simply don't want to get out of bed, particularly, I find, if it's a week day. I thought this was really well written and your writing flowed really well. Good luck in the contest.
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Sometimes we all have those days when we simply don't want to get out of bed, particularly, I find, if it's a week day. I thought this was really well written and your writing flowed really well. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 27-Aug-2024
