Comment from Debbie D'Arcy

Excellent

Such a cutie and a sweet follow-on from Lisa's fine Renga verse. He's a round enough little bundle to roll down that mountain at speed towards his favourite dairy delight. This instantly puts a smile on my face. Thank you, Gypsy. Take care Debbie

 Comment Written 13-Jan-2025

Comment from shelley kaye

Excellent

CHHEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-D

(i'm german - must have cheese lol)

anyway, a cute little renga haiku
nice imagery and smooth flow
no spag or typos

thank you for sharing
shelley :)

 Comment Written 13-Jan-2025

Comment from royowen

Excellent

It almost sounds like the great piece of cheese has been conceived and rolled down the hill, and the mouse has sealed his desire to make that cheese captive well done Gypsy, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 13-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025

Thank you very much 😊

Gypsy

reply by royowen on 13-Jan-2025

Blessings Roy

Comment from Jasmine Girl

Excellent

Haha. I like the idea of getting away from the darkness, the frozen lake and the scary animals like wolfs. Now we are writing the cute little mice. I also like the way you avoided mentioning the word "mouse' by using "a small bundle of joy."

I also like the internal rhyming "cheese bliss."

Well done.

 Comment Written 12-Jan-2025

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reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025

Thank you very much, jasmine, I'm happy you like it 😊