Calcareous Fen
Poem about fentanyl overdose10 total reviews
Comment from forestport12
Wow. Your layered sensory descriptions come alive here. I like how you used nature here as vehicle to get under the skin with an overdose, that's if I got this. I thought I should reciprocate your kindness to find and review my story. I can sense the lyrical writer in you too from your background. Welcome to fanstory
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2025
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Wow. Your layered sensory descriptions come alive here. I like how you used nature here as vehicle to get under the skin with an overdose, that's if I got this. I thought I should reciprocate your kindness to find and review my story. I can sense the lyrical writer in you too from your background. Welcome to fanstory
Comment Written 22-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2025
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Thank you so much for the kind and thorough review! -AVM
Comment from Lana Marie
That is definitely a sad day when families have to bury their loved ones who experienced an overdose, or I should say, didn't survive an overdose. I have a couple friends that their kids have struggled with addiction and lost them both to overdoses. one of my friends just had a year anniversary from her son overdosing.
Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2025
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That is definitely a sad day when families have to bury their loved ones who experienced an overdose, or I should say, didn't survive an overdose. I have a couple friends that their kids have struggled with addiction and lost them both to overdoses. one of my friends just had a year anniversary from her son overdosing.
Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 21-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2025
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I'm sorry you've felt that same pain of losing loved one to overdoses. The way opiate addiction hijacks the brain is truly an evil thing, whether you watch it happen to someone you love or (especially when) you experience it first hand. Wishing you all the best, kindness and love ~AVM
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Thank you Abigail, I'm noticing your picture that you must be in a band. My husband is a drummer in a band here in Minnesota.
Happy Wednesday!
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Of course! I was, yeah! ( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ynlR9uKwHtw ). We unfortunately broke up during the pandemic and I relocated from Minneapolis to Connecticut a few months ago. That's awesome that you're husband drums! Good drummers are a rare breed and always super special to come by.
Comment from Mrs Anna Howard
Great impactful poem. It oozes pain and sadness. There is nothing beautiful about fentanyl overdose, isn't it? Wonderful job! Thank you for sharing. Six stars!
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2025
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Great impactful poem. It oozes pain and sadness. There is nothing beautiful about fentanyl overdose, isn't it? Wonderful job! Thank you for sharing. Six stars!
Comment Written 21-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2025
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Thank you so so much for the amazing review! I'm truly touched that it moved you as it did. Thanks for the wonderful rating! <3 AVM
Comment from Jessica Wheeler
This is stunning, Abigail. The metaphor is evocative and heartbreaking. Your brilliant imagery evokes a sense of surrender, making the words tangible and deeply resonant. I was extremely moved by this piece, having lost someone I loved very much to an overdose. I'm vert happy to have come across this. I look forward to reading more of you!
Xo
Jess
reply by the author on 16-Jan-2025
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This is stunning, Abigail. The metaphor is evocative and heartbreaking. Your brilliant imagery evokes a sense of surrender, making the words tangible and deeply resonant. I was extremely moved by this piece, having lost someone I loved very much to an overdose. I'm vert happy to have come across this. I look forward to reading more of you!
Xo
Jess
Comment Written 16-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 16-Jan-2025
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Thank you so much, Jessica! This seriously means a ton. I put a lot of time into that one, struggling to find a place where it felt "finished". I'm sorry to hear you have lost someone that way, my condolences. It's unfortunate how sudden (and unfortunately common) it can be.
Thank you again for the support and feedback. I look forward to more readings shared between us! All the best, AVM
Comment from gangreen
This is an excellent poem.On first reading my main impression was of claustrophobia and suffocation,which is fair enough in itself but the Fentanyl angle adds more depth to this work,gives it purpose.I would have got this aspect eventually,the clues are there,needles-line four,and veins,line eighteen.The title itself Calcareous Fen,is also a clue,as if to say Fentanyl-the drug that turns you into stone.Here's some thoughts on what makes this poem work-the tone is set immediately by word one,-Decay-the reader knows that what follows is not going to be Daffodils.The poem reads easily due to effective use of alliteration, -to veins too listless to surf saline currents,sways water to slush,slick ad sodden.You show an interesting choice and deft employment of words, lave and abscondence for instance.and vivid imagery in this poem.
I hope to have been some encouragement to you
Gangreen.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2025
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This is an excellent poem.On first reading my main impression was of claustrophobia and suffocation,which is fair enough in itself but the Fentanyl angle adds more depth to this work,gives it purpose.I would have got this aspect eventually,the clues are there,needles-line four,and veins,line eighteen.The title itself Calcareous Fen,is also a clue,as if to say Fentanyl-the drug that turns you into stone.Here's some thoughts on what makes this poem work-the tone is set immediately by word one,-Decay-the reader knows that what follows is not going to be Daffodils.The poem reads easily due to effective use of alliteration, -to veins too listless to surf saline currents,sways water to slush,slick ad sodden.You show an interesting choice and deft employment of words, lave and abscondence for instance.and vivid imagery in this poem.
I hope to have been some encouragement to you
Gangreen.
Comment Written 14-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2025
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Thank you so much for the very in depth review! Your critique is extremely encouraging and appreciated to the max! Thanks again! I'm glad this piece resonated with you
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Thank you,I' m glad to been of some encouragement.it really is an excellent and original poem.
Comment from ESOSTINE
A very warm welcome to this wonderful Fanstory family, dear Abigail. Your poem is penned with deep emotion, with the theme of the harms of fentanyl overdose. You have written this with good flow. And I pray the subject finds needed healing. Well done, dear, and please keep the poems coming.
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2025
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A very warm welcome to this wonderful Fanstory family, dear Abigail. Your poem is penned with deep emotion, with the theme of the harms of fentanyl overdose. You have written this with good flow. And I pray the subject finds needed healing. Well done, dear, and please keep the poems coming.
Comment Written 14-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 14-Jan-2025
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Thanks for the warm welcome! I really appreciate the feedback. Your kind words mean a lot well -- I'm recently clean and trying to take one day at a time and keep steady. Thanks for your encouragement!
Comment from Rick Gardner
Hard to read and yet encompasses the depths of any overdose. hopefully you will never go down that path again. Live and give every day to yourself, grow with it, move on.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025
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Hard to read and yet encompasses the depths of any overdose. hopefully you will never go down that path again. Live and give every day to yourself, grow with it, move on.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025
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I really appreciate your feedback and kind wishes! Thank you :)
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This sounds like a stupor where the line between life and earth is thin and the sufferer cares nothing about which side of the line he is on. The is a case of extreme euphoria that could end life. A poignant write and welcome to Fanstory, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025
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This sounds like a stupor where the line between life and earth is thin and the sufferer cares nothing about which side of the line he is on. The is a case of extreme euphoria that could end life. A poignant write and welcome to Fanstory, love Dolly x
Comment Written 13-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025
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Thanks so much for the encouraging feedback!
Comment from Tim Margetts
Without the description given, I would never have known this was about an overdose.
It certainly reads as a journey, into what or who knows where is not clear.
It is abstract and almost ethereal in its imagery. almost as if a hallucinatory trip.
A good poem
Tim
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025
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Without the description given, I would never have known this was about an overdose.
It certainly reads as a journey, into what or who knows where is not clear.
It is abstract and almost ethereal in its imagery. almost as if a hallucinatory trip.
A good poem
Tim
Comment Written 13-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025
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Thank you so much! Thanks for taking the time to read and give feedback
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
Congrats on your first post! Your poem is powerful. I can really feel the intensity of emotion and the horror of a fentanyl overdose. Wonderful writing including "decay hung like fog" and "needles slick with tears." The way you show the quietness of the water lilies with the chaotic tension of the body's struggle is striking. Your choice of words really pulls me into the depth of your thoughts. Especially with "lungs buckle" and "the body ceases to wonder." Keep going - there's so much power in your words.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025
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Congrats on your first post! Your poem is powerful. I can really feel the intensity of emotion and the horror of a fentanyl overdose. Wonderful writing including "decay hung like fog" and "needles slick with tears." The way you show the quietness of the water lilies with the chaotic tension of the body's struggle is striking. Your choice of words really pulls me into the depth of your thoughts. Especially with "lungs buckle" and "the body ceases to wonder." Keep going - there's so much power in your words.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2025
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2025
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I really appreciate your feedback. I've been extremely self conscious about my writing as I start sending things out for (hopeful) publication, so I massively appreciate your encouraging words! Thank you for taking the time to read and for writing such a detailed response!
