You Would Know
A poem about betrayal28 total reviews
Comment from Jim Wile
This was a beautifully written, very emotional poem about a feeling you've apparently held onto for years, Jess. You seem to have a good understanding of it now, but it's still there in the background, and it still hurts.
It was an interesting observation you made in your notes about how the deepest pain may be in knowing how much pain you've caused others. And sometimes it's easier to forgive others than to forgive yourself.
I loved the meter of this poem: a 3-3-5 pattern with a feminine ending on each second line. Unusual but very effective.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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This was a beautifully written, very emotional poem about a feeling you've apparently held onto for years, Jess. You seem to have a good understanding of it now, but it's still there in the background, and it still hurts.
It was an interesting observation you made in your notes about how the deepest pain may be in knowing how much pain you've caused others. And sometimes it's easier to forgive others than to forgive yourself.
I loved the meter of this poem: a 3-3-5 pattern with a feminine ending on each second line. Unusual but very effective.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Thank you, Jim, for your encouraging review. I went a little "outside the box" on this one, so I'm thrilled to know you enjoyed the meter! Xoxo
Comment from EeanBlack
We've all hurt or have been hurt. There won't be any judgment from me there. This is a solid piece. I usually pick a line that stands out, but the whole thing just jumps at me. I am usually the one being betrayed, so it lands painfully accurate there. Very impressive.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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We've all hurt or have been hurt. There won't be any judgment from me there. This is a solid piece. I usually pick a line that stands out, but the whole thing just jumps at me. I am usually the one being betrayed, so it lands painfully accurate there. Very impressive.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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I appreciate this so much. Thank you! Xo
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No problem.
Comment from talented150
I felt your poem about betrayal was well-written and well-rhymed. I have never seen a poem so well-organized with the stanzas rhyming. You have real talent, and I can't wait to read more of your poems.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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I felt your poem about betrayal was well-written and well-rhymed. I have never seen a poem so well-organized with the stanzas rhyming. You have real talent, and I can't wait to read more of your poems.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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That means the world to me. Thank you!! Xo
Comment from AP Apgar
What an amazing poem with a beautiful picture presentation supporting- your poem is so well written I reread it a couple of times - so relatable for so many in life - your poem seemingly making amends for deed's and taking responsibility for your part - very commendable approach to life -Outstanding- Bless
Alan
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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What an amazing poem with a beautiful picture presentation supporting- your poem is so well written I reread it a couple of times - so relatable for so many in life - your poem seemingly making amends for deed's and taking responsibility for your part - very commendable approach to life -Outstanding- Bless
Alan
Comment Written 26-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Thank you so very much, Alan! Xoxo
Comment from Elena Zhuravel
Hello,
I really like how the metaphors are used, and the way the grayness, tension, and depth are beautifully conveyed. The emotions after reading this are very mixed and heavy, which is why I give it a high rating, it truly leaves an impact.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Hello,
I really like how the metaphors are used, and the way the grayness, tension, and depth are beautifully conveyed. The emotions after reading this are very mixed and heavy, which is why I give it a high rating, it truly leaves an impact.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Thank you so much, that means the world! Xo
Comment from GWHARGIS
Wow, this was such a different angle of broken love. The confession without the expectation of forgiveness shows a maturity gotten too late. It was beautifully written. Gretchen
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Wow, this was such a different angle of broken love. The confession without the expectation of forgiveness shows a maturity gotten too late. It was beautifully written. Gretchen
Comment Written 26-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Thank you so much, Gretchen. Xo
Comment from Dawn Munro
Oh, my -- first your notes -- these should be an essay! They're far too vital a warning to simply be notes!
As to the poem itself, wow! This touches this reader deeply, so very familiar...
"I only wish to take
the weight of what you shoulder,
and wear it as my own so you could go."
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Oh, my -- first your notes -- these should be an essay! They're far too vital a warning to simply be notes!
As to the poem itself, wow! This touches this reader deeply, so very familiar...
"I only wish to take
the weight of what you shoulder,
and wear it as my own so you could go."
Comment Written 26-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Thank you so much; that means the world to me, Dawn! Xo
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You're very welcome!
Comment from Sanku
The poem of love and betrayal tells you the story from the point of the betrayer .. Something i have never thought of . The last lines shows that he is asking for a second chance ..This is touchingly written
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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The poem of love and betrayal tells you the story from the point of the betrayer .. Something i have never thought of . The last lines shows that he is asking for a second chance ..This is touchingly written
Comment Written 26-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Thank you so much! Xo
Comment from Pam Lonsdale
This one stanza says it all for me: Yet still, I let us fray; I pulled till we unraveled, when not a thread was false, or wrongly sewn.
I was that person in my youth, and I caused a good man to walk away because of my actions.
"I'll be just a stop along your way." What a heart wrenching line.
Normally when we speak of betrayal, we are speaking of what others have done to us. You've turned that on its head and given us something unique and honest.
I think this is amazing, Jess. Good luck in the betrayal contest.
xo
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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This one stanza says it all for me: Yet still, I let us fray; I pulled till we unraveled, when not a thread was false, or wrongly sewn.
I was that person in my youth, and I caused a good man to walk away because of my actions.
"I'll be just a stop along your way." What a heart wrenching line.
Normally when we speak of betrayal, we are speaking of what others have done to us. You've turned that on its head and given us something unique and honest.
I think this is amazing, Jess. Good luck in the betrayal contest.
xo
Comment Written 26-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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That truly means a lot to me, Pam. It appears that you and I have gained insights from similar experiences! Thank you for your honesty and wonderful review. XOXO
Comment from Wendy G
A very thoughtful and insightful poem reflecting on the pain to another of one's own betrayal, and the burden of grief that brings. Your powerful poem with its strong, original, and imaginative imagery should do very well in the contest, and I send you my very best wishes.
Wendy
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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A very thoughtful and insightful poem reflecting on the pain to another of one's own betrayal, and the burden of grief that brings. Your powerful poem with its strong, original, and imaginative imagery should do very well in the contest, and I send you my very best wishes.
Wendy
Comment Written 26-Mar-2025
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2025
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Wendy, that means so much. Thank you! Xoxo
