Spit, Gum and Shoe Laces
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Shades of Fusion"A Progression Of Expression From Fiction To Faith
9 total reviews
Comment from VICTIMEYES
very good rhyme scheme, it al flowed very well in my reading, this also has a very unique content and idea in it, mixed marrige, works out nicely.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2007
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very good rhyme scheme, it al flowed very well in my reading, this also has a very unique content and idea in it, mixed marrige, works out nicely.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2007
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2007
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thank you for the review and your time
Comment from GINTARAS KAVARSKAS
Hello!
Sincerely thank you for your writing!
I read it once again!
The poem was very well written. It was just fine.
The rhythm and rhyme is good I think.
Each stanza was well written. The structure is good.
The stress in the final lines is common to this poem.
I liked that you had your idea and developed it throughout the poem.
The subject was clear.
I also liked the symobolic meanings very much indeed.
I wish all the very best when you get next comment!
I am sorry I cannot give you more stars because I have the highest 5
and I do not know why all reviewers have 6 stars at the beginning only, on this web site.
I really appreciate your writing.
Yours sincerely,
GINTARAS KAVARSKAS, professional English writer
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
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Hello!
Sincerely thank you for your writing!
I read it once again!
The poem was very well written. It was just fine.
The rhythm and rhyme is good I think.
Each stanza was well written. The structure is good.
The stress in the final lines is common to this poem.
I liked that you had your idea and developed it throughout the poem.
The subject was clear.
I also liked the symobolic meanings very much indeed.
I wish all the very best when you get next comment!
I am sorry I cannot give you more stars because I have the highest 5
and I do not know why all reviewers have 6 stars at the beginning only, on this web site.
I really appreciate your writing.
Yours sincerely,
GINTARAS KAVARSKAS, professional English writer
Comment Written 19-Apr-2007
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
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thank you for you time to review my work.
Comment from Electraglida
I liked your poem very much. Technically, it flowed well, the rhymes seem natural and not at all forced. There's great imagery, too..."My color born from the pigment of two A smooth, rich blend of dark coffee brew".
You have captured the race struggle beautifully. Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
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I liked your poem very much. Technically, it flowed well, the rhymes seem natural and not at all forced. There's great imagery, too..."My color born from the pigment of two A smooth, rich blend of dark coffee brew".
You have captured the race struggle beautifully. Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 19-Apr-2007
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
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thank you for you time to review my work.
Comment from KalleeMerra
very well written and bravo for the subject matter as well. i particularly liked,
"In their honor, racial tolerance our prayer
Amidst the camouflage world we all share"
blessings,
kallee merra
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
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very well written and bravo for the subject matter as well. i particularly liked,
"In their honor, racial tolerance our prayer
Amidst the camouflage world we all share"
blessings,
kallee merra
Comment Written 19-Apr-2007
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
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thank you for you time to review my work.
Comment from Siva
You are right. Love and commitment can fend off the illogical protectionist hegemony of the puritan(?). At heart the shades of races bear no traces at all. It is all imaginary, a ploy to retain the monopoly. This poem is extra-ordinary in that it throws open the doors of matrimonial high handedness of yesteryears. Thank God that human race has got over such immaturities now.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
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You are right. Love and commitment can fend off the illogical protectionist hegemony of the puritan(?). At heart the shades of races bear no traces at all. It is all imaginary, a ploy to retain the monopoly. This poem is extra-ordinary in that it throws open the doors of matrimonial high handedness of yesteryears. Thank God that human race has got over such immaturities now.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2007
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
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thank you for you time to review my work.
Comment from Red Heart
Very nice expression of this picture.
One of the more orginal interpretations.
It has good flow and images.
Well done Blue.
Red Heart
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
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Very nice expression of this picture.
One of the more orginal interpretations.
It has good flow and images.
Well done Blue.
Red Heart
Comment Written 19-Apr-2007
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2007
-
thank you for you time to review my work.
Comment from D. Longo
This is the second of two reviews, in two days. The world view in the first might have prepared me for another world view; each displaying maturity and an understanding uncommon. Most esteemed of this poem ( message a caveat ), is a focus on family and individuals within that family. The author's take on the artwork is valued as well. The two people portrayed appear to be siblings. D.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2007
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This is the second of two reviews, in two days. The world view in the first might have prepared me for another world view; each displaying maturity and an understanding uncommon. Most esteemed of this poem ( message a caveat ), is a focus on family and individuals within that family. The author's take on the artwork is valued as well. The two people portrayed appear to be siblings. D.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2007
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2007
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This piece was a blessing to me but I am just a portal for the words to flow through. It is my craft but I really can not take more than a speck of credit. I hope I can share more with you in the future. Thank you?
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Blue, I'd be honored to read anything you post. D.
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Danka...
Comment from mgeller
Excellent. I know its true that people are prejudice and you would think that after all that has gone on through the years that we could finally put it behind us as a human race but it sill lives on in cold hearts and closed minds. Those who can rise above are strong in character and integrity and in a better place than those who cast the stones. Thank you. Marilyn
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2007
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Excellent. I know its true that people are prejudice and you would think that after all that has gone on through the years that we could finally put it behind us as a human race but it sill lives on in cold hearts and closed minds. Those who can rise above are strong in character and integrity and in a better place than those who cast the stones. Thank you. Marilyn
Comment Written 14-Apr-2007
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2007
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I am humbled by your connection to the piece and can only offer my thanks for your time and incredible words of support. Sometimes a piece hits a specific nerve, reminding us of a river that we have seen in our dreams or the Popsicles we shared at Grandma?s house during the fourth of July. This piece was a blessing to me but I am just a portal for the words to flow through. It is my craft but I really can not take more than a speck of credit. I hope I can share more with you in the future. Thank you?
Comment from WATERLILY
I just love the sentiments in this Blue... Some poetry just hits the spot and this one did for me. I live in a multicultural society where we are still learning to live together. The words you use are beautiful.(so are the words in your profile) I am struggling to pick bits out, since I like it all, but; "My color born from the pigment of two A smooth rich blend of dark coffee brew." and "We strive to achieve our individual dreams Ignoring barriers and xenophobic schemes."....and the rest.....
6's are rare, so when I see one, I get excited. Beautiful, and good look in the contest.
Marilyn.
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2007
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I just love the sentiments in this Blue... Some poetry just hits the spot and this one did for me. I live in a multicultural society where we are still learning to live together. The words you use are beautiful.(so are the words in your profile) I am struggling to pick bits out, since I like it all, but; "My color born from the pigment of two A smooth rich blend of dark coffee brew." and "We strive to achieve our individual dreams Ignoring barriers and xenophobic schemes."....and the rest.....
6's are rare, so when I see one, I get excited. Beautiful, and good look in the contest.
Marilyn.
Comment Written 14-Apr-2007
reply by the author on 14-Apr-2007
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I am humbled by your connection to the piece and can only offer my thanks for your time and incredible words of support. Sometimes a piece hits a specific nerve, reminding us of a river that we have seen in our dreams or the Popsicles we shared at Grandma?s house during the fourth of July. This piece was a blessing to me but I am just a portal for the words to flow through. It is my craft but I really can not take more than a speck of credit. I hope I can share more with you in the future. Thank you?
