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Contest Entry and Winners

Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Lonely Little Lilly"
Short Stories

41 total reviews 
Comment from dmjones
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I have no idea either but I loved the descriptions. I could picture them in my mind. So peaceful. I used to have little spots where I went as kid also. I didn't spot any changes. Good luck with this.

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    Donna,

    Me too! Near the creek in a wild violet patch...Thanks so much for the comments. Smiles, Carol
Comment from ladybird
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Very cute little story. I don't know what alliteration meand either, but it seems to work in this. The picture is very cute. Well done with this.

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    ladybird,

    Thank you for stopping by and for enjoying the story. As always, I appreciate it very much. Smiles, Carol
reply by ladybird on 08-Mar-2010
    You're welcome.
Comment from Trybuck
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Your lovely little simple story was filled full of ample alliteration. Each submitted sentence was easily endowed with determined dedication.
Maybe I should have tried this one or not. Well done with your enticing entry, Buck

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    Buck,

    Yes, you should have...I had no idea what I was doing and I am sure you could even do better...Thank you for the kind comments. Smiles, CArol
Comment from jadapenn
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Pretty nifty story which you could develop for children. It has great visuals and appeal and will captivate a child. Your aliterations were terrific. Oh, you do work until all hours but I do so love all your short stories.
Well done and best wishes for the contest. luv jada

 Comment Written 07-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    jada,

    Don't sleep much and my head is giving me fits..Hard to see the computer screen, but impossible to sit and do nothing...Catch 22... Glad you enjoyed....Smiles, Carol
Comment from Jnetgame
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Excellent story, Carol. I think this is exactly what you are supposed to do in this contest. I thought about entering, but I really don't have the time (or patience) right now. Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    Jnetgame,

    Me either! Can't believe that once I got started I discovered how difficult it would be..Glad you enjoyed. Smiles, Crol
Comment from fionageorge
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Carol, how do you come up with these great stories, and still meet the very challenging rules of this alliteration contest. I admire you. I am not even going to try this one.
Well written, lovely story, great use of alliteration, loved the poem in the middle. Any parent or grandparent would enjoy reading this to their little ones.
Good luck in the contest
Warmest regards
Marijke

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    Marijke,

    I am sure you as a poet would have that alliteration thing down and could write it in a flash...It was a struggle for me...especially with this headache that won't seem to go away...You should give it a try...Smiles, CArol
reply by fionageorge on 08-Mar-2010
    Now, that is a challenge I will think about! Take care, my friend, and if you ever want to talk to someone removed from your problems, I am a good listener. I know you talk to Mel, and I imagine she is a wonderful support and a loving soul, helping you through your troubles. But, if you think I could help, I am here. Warmest regards and hugs, Marijke
Comment from barbara.wilkey
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Cute and very silly. I liked it. I guess I liek cute and silly, maybe's that's why I teach first graders. Could be. Good job and good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    Barbara,

    Thank you for the kind and generous thoughts. Cute and silly is good! Smiles, Carol
Comment from nora arjuna
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hi carol, thanks so much for entering the contest. the response's rather slow so i thought no one was interested.

yes, in my opinion you've done really well here. loads of alliteratio in it with a sweet story as well. only thing is, storywise, you focused more on the imagery than little lilly. it'll be cuter to see or hear how she responds to her surroundings.

in all you achieved the contest requirement. best wishes from me. isn't it not to worry about adverbs and such once in a while? :)

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    arjuna,

    I've been suffering from blurred vision and pounding headaches for days so for a first attempt I was happy...Next time I'll give it more dialogue since that's usually how I like to write anyhow. Smiles, CArol
reply by nora arjuna on 08-Mar-2010
    sorry to hear that, carol. i've just recovered from sore throat, and still having minor cough. hope you're getting better.
Comment from melyuki
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hey sis, seems like alliteration to me baby., and heaps of it . what a lovely little story with a really nice message to share. the beauty of nature, and the joys it can bring to one who thinks for some reason they stand all alone.. God gifts to us never leave us lonely, and all we need to do is open our eyes, listen well and feel with our heart to receive abundant amounts of love from all around us.. great story sis. well done., and with all your alliteration.,., hugs to you my big sis, luv Melxxx the nature lover from way back.. xxxx

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    Sis,

    I thought I better answer these 50 plus reviews (headache or not) or I would have way too much later...Thanks as always for enjoying the story..Smiles, Carol
Comment from Realist101
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Hi Carol! According to the prompt, it looks like you did it just right! A cute and fun read, I really like this!!When I saw the title, and the name Lilly, I thought of a cat I had, she was snow white, and we had to take her to a rescue place, where we could not find out what happened to her. I still feel bad. But GOOD work my friend!! ps...I hope you have a nice day tomorrow, it is supposed to be a bit warmer?? Hugs, Susan

 Comment Written 06-Mar-2010


reply by the author on 08-Mar-2010
    Susan,

    Hope you are doing well...Thanks for the wonderful comments and sharing your story...sorry about your Lilly though. Smiles, Carol
reply by Realist101 on 08-Mar-2010
    I am with you in my thoughts and prayers dear Carol, email anytime if you want to talk...Love, Susan