Dust Bunnies
a woman cleaning/subtle horror/no gore28 total reviews
Comment from Sally Carter
Hahahaaaa... I love it, Susan. After reading this, I shan't dare peek under the bed.
I love the idea of the dust motes and the "other world" that might be living on them. My kids used to love Horton the Elephant.
This is such an original horror story - fantasy and fun in one package. No wonder it got at least one 6.
Thanks for pointing me in the direction of your lovely story.
Best wishes
Sally
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2011
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Hahahaaaa... I love it, Susan. After reading this, I shan't dare peek under the bed.
I love the idea of the dust motes and the "other world" that might be living on them. My kids used to love Horton the Elephant.
This is such an original horror story - fantasy and fun in one package. No wonder it got at least one 6.
Thanks for pointing me in the direction of your lovely story.
Best wishes
Sally
Comment Written 19-Feb-2011
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2011
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Oh Sally! You and I are alike in disliking dust and dirt! I thank you for this review, but just wanted you to read this! ") Hugs and lots of smiles! Happy cleaning! ") Susan
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I couldn't possible read something that amused me so much and not take the time to let you know!
S
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Well, thank you again Sally! I have to clean the big duster thing I use under the bed and stuff? It's Black!! I spray wood cleaner on it when I do the floor...but now there are things under the bed that I have to dig out and put elsewhere! I hope I don't get dustbunnies up my nose! ") We will have to wear those white mask thingies? LOL! ") Thank you again Sally!! xoxo, susan
Comment from The Stranger
good line spacing produces a nice even flow to this, the storyline is of great humor which would see the reader to look forward read more from the author
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
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good line spacing produces a nice even flow to this, the storyline is of great humor which would see the reader to look forward read more from the author
Comment Written 02-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
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Hi there! Why thank you so much! I hope you will stay with me some! It's fun having people read for me who are this encouraging! Thank you so much! Susan
Comment from Judy Swanson
Oh my Susan. What a funny, yet unsettling, story of how what goes on in our minds in the light of day can have such a huge impact on our dreams at night! I love the dialog with the mop, the personalizing it with eyes and a voice, and the blowing cigarette smoke in its direction! You told the story of denial and of procrastination, as well as distraction as a tactic, to avoid dealing with something you do not want to deal with. And then, it comes back in the dead of night to haunt your dream. As I said, fun and yet very unsettling. Well done.
Judy
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
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Oh my Susan. What a funny, yet unsettling, story of how what goes on in our minds in the light of day can have such a huge impact on our dreams at night! I love the dialog with the mop, the personalizing it with eyes and a voice, and the blowing cigarette smoke in its direction! You told the story of denial and of procrastination, as well as distraction as a tactic, to avoid dealing with something you do not want to deal with. And then, it comes back in the dead of night to haunt your dream. As I said, fun and yet very unsettling. Well done.
Judy
Comment Written 01-Jan-2011
reply by the author on 02-Jan-2011
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Hi Judy! I am SO sorry for being late here. Thank you so very much! I love that you got a kick out of the mop. Neat!! Your reviews are nicely detailed and so helpful! I will send you a vote when I can! ") Luv, susan
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You are so welcome! You deserve the good reviews. Judy
Comment from Mastery
Happy New Year, Suze. This is a rather sad story, you know? I sense a very lonely person coping as best as she can with the shadows of the past that will not be in the future. You are a wonderful woman with a heart of gold. Bless you and thank you for being my friend. By the way, I have been thorough Bedford many times on my way south. LOL...Bob
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2010
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Happy New Year, Suze. This is a rather sad story, you know? I sense a very lonely person coping as best as she can with the shadows of the past that will not be in the future. You are a wonderful woman with a heart of gold. Bless you and thank you for being my friend. By the way, I have been thorough Bedford many times on my way south. LOL...Bob
Comment Written 31-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 31-Dec-2010
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Why thank you my friend!! What a wonderful review and kind thoughts too. If we are still here the next time you get down this way, please stop by? It would be a joy to meet you! Happy New Year Bob!! HUG! Susan
Comment from Isaiah Ramesses
Grim...and eerie, my friend. I never thought dust could be so horrible...I'm lying. The bible and other religious articles teach cleanliness because spirits not only live in water but compacted dirt (earth). If this builds up in your home then they'll be there. Fine read.
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2011
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Grim...and eerie, my friend. I never thought dust could be so horrible...I'm lying. The bible and other religious articles teach cleanliness because spirits not only live in water but compacted dirt (earth). If this builds up in your home then they'll be there. Fine read.
Comment Written 31-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 01-Jan-2011
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Oh no! I try so hard to keep this house clean...but with animals we have to run in and out so much! I sweep EVERY day! I do. Maybe I need to hire a maid! I wish...Oh well...but I am glad that you like this. ") Susan
Comment from Trybuck
It's all too easy to put off those jobs that don't seem so important in the whole scheme of things. Well done with this one, Buck
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2011
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It's all too easy to put off those jobs that don't seem so important in the whole scheme of things. Well done with this one, Buck
Comment Written 31-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2011
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HI Buck! Thank you SO much...it's great to know you liked this too! Thanks again! Susan
Comment from Kathryn Varuzza
Oh Susan,
This is chilling.
And funny at the same time.
Great image.
This made me laugh.
Love the first paragraph, and the way you ended it.
Oh my! because I have a long haired cat, I have tons of dust bunnies. The spiders love it. They are in heaven. Oh well, if you don't hear from me in a while Susan, you know the dust bunnies got me. lol!
xoxo,
katie
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2011
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Oh Susan,
This is chilling.
And funny at the same time.
Great image.
This made me laugh.
Love the first paragraph, and the way you ended it.
Oh my! because I have a long haired cat, I have tons of dust bunnies. The spiders love it. They are in heaven. Oh well, if you don't hear from me in a while Susan, you know the dust bunnies got me. lol!
xoxo,
katie
Comment Written 30-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2011
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HI Katie! Thank you for another great review! I love that you like my work! xoxo. Susan
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Susan, I do love your work. And you're welcome.
xoxo,
katie
Comment from Glynnis W
Su,
This is a cute and fun little vignette. Living alone can certainly a person over the edge. Having a dust mop as a minor character is a hard one to pull off, so I'm wondering if changing this to a third person narrator might help it along. It would certainly help with defining a mop as a character. It's also difficult to tell a story when the first person narrator appears to die, because who is left to tell the tale?
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2011
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Su,
This is a cute and fun little vignette. Living alone can certainly a person over the edge. Having a dust mop as a minor character is a hard one to pull off, so I'm wondering if changing this to a third person narrator might help it along. It would certainly help with defining a mop as a character. It's also difficult to tell a story when the first person narrator appears to die, because who is left to tell the tale?
Comment Written 30-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2011
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Hi D.H.! Thank you very much!! I am happy you liked this! I will try to work on the pov with this sometime? I can't tell where I changed it. But, at least you liked it...that's what matters...") Thanks again!! Susan
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Good story with some good potential for further darkness. I enjoyed it.
Comment from AnnaLinda
LOL Susan,
Are you that woman is not you?? This thing is a riot and
an abosolute BLAST! Dust bunnies are likely to take over
the entire universe!!!
"The mop speaks more truth"
(that was the mop speaking:)
Linda
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2010
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LOL Susan,
Are you that woman is not you?? This thing is a riot and
an abosolute BLAST! Dust bunnies are likely to take over
the entire universe!!!
"The mop speaks more truth"
(that was the mop speaking:)
Linda
Comment Written 30-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 30-Dec-2010
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Hi there! I'm glad you got a laugh from this Linda!! I really do "chase" these things...it's really infuriating when you're tired to start with. And I love/hate the mop on t.v, it doesn't talk? But "stalks" the lady who just got a Swiffer? HA! Thank you Sweet Linda for another wonderful review! DON'T leave?? "( Susan
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You are hysterical!!
I see you have indigo blue in your story. Have you ever looked into the indigo children thing?
Go to youtube and type in Indigo children > I THINK YOU ARE ONE!!!
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What?? What on earth? I will have to check this out...how strange? Hope it's something not too weird!?? HA...lol! ") S
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lol Let me know what you think -
Do take time to take a peek...
I'll send you a link if you want.
I put it on the other poem I posted too:)
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Oh my...I've been reading about this...and I have to say, I really think my son is an Indigo. He has ALL the characteristics...I do too, except I don't feel wise...???This is so odd. I sure don't feel special, but Sam is, he knows things, it's scary. ??? I had heard of a singing duo called the Indigo Girls, so I thought that's all this was. ?? I am going to read more too...thank you Linda, who knows...this may be a good thing...Sam has many problems that now may seem clear? Because they aren't really problems...just differences maybe. ?? Wow. Thank you again...xoxo. Susan
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is great, at my house i think the dust bunnies are attaching themselves to the hair that comes out when i brush my hair to form unmovable dust balls that refuse to be vacuumed up. i enjoyed reading it.
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2011
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this is great, at my house i think the dust bunnies are attaching themselves to the hair that comes out when i brush my hair to form unmovable dust balls that refuse to be vacuumed up. i enjoyed reading it.
Comment Written 30-Dec-2010
reply by the author on 04-Jan-2011
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HA! I wonder if I have them in my hair too?? Probably not. Not enough hair. OH....thanks again my friend...another wonderful review...with a very tardy reply... SO sorry....luv, Susan