Storytime
Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "Vanished Into Thick Air"A book full of story poems
5 total reviews
Comment from trishasmith
Wow!
I love a good horror movie or a good horror story, but you in just a few short sentences summed up a whole lot of evil in a very short time span.
Great words, great way to put it all together, you did a bang up job.
I have to say the picture prepared me for something scary, and your words did not disappoint. You brought it on.
No I do not want to see a ghost! Especially not yours! I love to be scared, and I hate it the most to be scared. I read scary stuff with trepidation, but yet I enjoy the thrill.
I really liked how you bought that all together for me. I really liked how you ended it. Really great job!
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2011
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Wow!
I love a good horror movie or a good horror story, but you in just a few short sentences summed up a whole lot of evil in a very short time span.
Great words, great way to put it all together, you did a bang up job.
I have to say the picture prepared me for something scary, and your words did not disappoint. You brought it on.
No I do not want to see a ghost! Especially not yours! I love to be scared, and I hate it the most to be scared. I read scary stuff with trepidation, but yet I enjoy the thrill.
I really liked how you bought that all together for me. I really liked how you ended it. Really great job!
Comment Written 09-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 12-Nov-2011
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I think you describe well the paradox of horror stories! On the one hand we are squeamish, and on the other, curious!
So glad (and sorry! LOL) you found this scary! Thank you for your wonderfully encouraging review. I really appreciate it - Cally :)
Comment from adewpearl
good internal rhyme in fears appear
excellent sensory detail in the tasted the air stanza - this really helps create a bleak mood
then the appeal to the sense of touch with those claws and the sense of sound with the screaming - each stanza with its focus on a different sense creates great concrete images that contribute to the scary, eerie atmosphere
bleeding eardrums, ripped out eyeballs - this is powerful stuff :-)
You most certainly create a poem of blackened despair :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2011
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good internal rhyme in fears appear
excellent sensory detail in the tasted the air stanza - this really helps create a bleak mood
then the appeal to the sense of touch with those claws and the sense of sound with the screaming - each stanza with its focus on a different sense creates great concrete images that contribute to the scary, eerie atmosphere
bleeding eardrums, ripped out eyeballs - this is powerful stuff :-)
You most certainly create a poem of blackened despair :-) Brooke
Comment Written 24-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 28-Oct-2011
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Oops, sorry for the late reply, Brooke. I thought I'd replied.
Well, I shan't say this was a pleasure to write! Had to shake it off when I'd finished! LOL
Thank you so much for allyour encouragement, it means a lot - Cally :)
Comment from Kevin C
This is perfect for Halloween, it reads well and flows so well. You capture a dark mood with the reader and images through your words are graphic. I love the last stanza. Nicely done.
Kevin
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2011
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This is perfect for Halloween, it reads well and flows so well. You capture a dark mood with the reader and images through your words are graphic. I love the last stanza. Nicely done.
Kevin
Comment Written 21-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2011
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Hi Kevin C,
and thank you so much for your thoughtful review! You have hit on all the things I was worried about... is the flow ok... does the last stanza work... does the imagery work? Thank you for your very reassuring words :)
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You are welcome. This was really an excellent read and all those things worked very well.
Kevin
Comment from yndemand
I have to say gory is not my favorite things but you hit it very well and your picture matched it perfectly to your words. I enjoyed it even though I dont like bloody,lol
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2011
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I have to say gory is not my favorite things but you hit it very well and your picture matched it perfectly to your words. I enjoyed it even though I dont like bloody,lol
Comment Written 21-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2011
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Wow! Thank you! Actually, I'm not very fond of gory or scary either, but thought I'd have a go at this challenge. Thanks again for your encouraging words :)
Comment from Kingsland
This poem goes on a very serious tone. Up and until your last stanza.That is where is lightens up just a bit on the humorous side of poetic thinking. This was just a joy to have read and written this response for... John
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2011
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This poem goes on a very serious tone. Up and until your last stanza.That is where is lightens up just a bit on the humorous side of poetic thinking. This was just a joy to have read and written this response for... John
Comment Written 21-Oct-2011
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2011
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Thank you for your kind review, John. It is much appreciated :)
