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Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "The Third Station"
A Flash Fiction Collection

23 total reviews 
Comment from Dean Kuch
Excellent
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Alois Schicklgruber, the infamous Adolf Hitler's father.

This is the first person I thought of as I began reading your well written story for the Way Station contest, Author 'X'. The protagonists vivid images depicting the barbarism of warfare, which he in turn imparted upon the woman bashing "Frankie", prompted me to think this way I believe.

Alois' son Adolf Hitler, following the rumours that his paternal grandfather was a Jew, in 1931 ordered the SS (Schutzstaffel) to investigate the alleged rumours regarding his ancestry.

Funny that he feared opening the Diary of Anne Frank. Shame, really. It's an excellent book.

Well done, and best of luck to you in the contest.

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 05-Nov-2014
    Thank you very much, Dean.
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
Excellent
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This meets the contest requirements splendidly. This is wonderfully written and completely held me captive from beginning to end. I wish you all the best in the coting and thank you so much for sharing this with me.

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 05-Nov-2014
    Thank you very much
Comment from jpduck
Excellent
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This is a powerful and riveting story, even though I suspect I have not completely understood it. I'm puzzling about who the old man is. He is clearly as dead as Frankie, but he is also an 'old soul'. He would also seem to represent, probably amongst many other things, the essence of Naziism. So I guess he is Satan and Frankie's train is going to hell? If you can spare the time, I would appreciate it if you can tell me if I've got it about right, or if I haven't a clue.

 Comment Written 05-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 05-Nov-2014
    Thank you for the review. I guess, I didn't put in enough clues. Leaving readers puzzled isn't a good sign. He is Hitler.
reply by jpduck on 06-Nov-2014
    You have put in exactly the right number of clues. Hitler did occur to me because of his reaction to 'Diary of Anne Frank'. I should have got that, although I'm not sure what he is doing hanging around in this limbo station - waiting for Frankie, I dare say - why not? I could have looked up Alois on the internet. I just tried it - went straight to it! A brilliant story. I am going to try to increase my rating to six stars, although I'm not sure if it will let me do that.
Comment from Emily George
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow I am chilled to the bone! I knew of course when I saw that train I should expect something sinister. And that's what you gave in this brilliant story. Well executed, I enjoyed the read,good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 04-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 04-Nov-2014
    Thank you very much. I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Comment from LIJ Red
Excellent
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Was that Herr Shicklgruber? The one the Tommy corporal should have plinked like a beer bottle? Did I see a comma that needed a space? A fine story, this.

 Comment Written 04-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 04-Nov-2014
    Thank you very much
Comment from TheWriteTeach
Excellent
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This was a strong and powerful piece. How fitting for Hitler's soul to be stuck here, on Earth, helping other bad souls to cross over. The irony of his not being able to get rid of 'Anne Frank' was brilliant! This was very well written. It grabbed my interest immediately and kept me glued straight to the end. This flowed well, nothing slowed down the forward movement of the story, and your dialogue was believable and not fake or forced. Well done. Good luck in the contest. I think you will do well.

Suzanne

 Comment Written 03-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 04-Nov-2014
    Thank you very much
Comment from DSMalott
Excellent
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This was an excellent read.
It was, in its short narrative, full of strong moral lessons and possessed well written glimpses of the natural and supernatural layered upon each other. The main character was hauntingly engaging and well developed.
Thanks for writing.

 Comment Written 03-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 04-Nov-2014
    Thank you very much
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Excellent
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Hi,

The long black train. Great story. I like when Alois tells Frankie not to use that word again. Also the power he has over him.

Great presentation. Good luck in the contest.

Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'.... Jax (*.*)



 Comment Written 03-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 04-Nov-2014
    Thank you very much
Comment from adewpearl
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Dramatic, attention-grabbing opening
vivid character description
vivid detail of setting
It was the Germans whom attracted - who attracted
strong emotion in the dialogue - he slumped down - with good use of non-verbal communication to enhance the emotion of the conversation
a powerful closing - a high-impact story
Brooke

 Comment Written 03-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 03-Nov-2014
    Thank you very much.
Comment from Eric1
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a very compelling and powerful story, I reveled in every word, your writing skills shine through here like a beacon in the dark, and that ending was magnificent, thank you for writing and sharing and I wish you good luck in the contest my friend.

 Comment Written 03-Nov-2014


reply by the author on 03-Nov-2014
    Thank you very much
reply by Eric1 on 04-Nov-2014
    You are welcome