All in a Day's Work
Bob meets Sheila for the first time since childhood.42 total reviews
Comment from Karen Cherry Threadgill
Love this little bite. A smitten man controlled by his past and the accompanying hormones, ignores all his training to go off with a sultry goddess he once knew.
You do the besotted guys well. Karen :-)
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Love this little bite. A smitten man controlled by his past and the accompanying hormones, ignores all his training to go off with a sultry goddess he once knew.
You do the besotted guys well. Karen :-)
Comment Written 05-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Mar-2024
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Don't women always make guys act silly and goofy? No matter how big and tough there's always one weakness to control the beast. But on the other hand, how many women can resist a softhearted man? We're all human and have vulnerabilities. Well, most anyway. Thank you so much, Karen, for your willingness to go back and read my old stories I appreciate your time, kindness, and continued encouragement. You're a champ!
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You could write a detective series starring you and me all
"Moonlighting" Only I play the Bruce Willis part and you the Cybill Sheperd part.:-)
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Ha ha, I bet you'd make a mean Bruce, Yippee Ki-Yay Mamacita.
Comment from lyenochka
Oh no! What happened? Someone was still infatuated with a classmate. But she turned out to be a professional killer? That's why we shouldn't read Stephen King.
I wondered about " She pulled her rubber gloves off from the inside out, pitching them and the bloody knife onto his back." Why did she throw the gloves and knife on his back and not throw away the evidence? Wouldn't the inside of the gloves have some DNA evidence?
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2023
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Oh no! What happened? Someone was still infatuated with a classmate. But she turned out to be a professional killer? That's why we shouldn't read Stephen King.
I wondered about " She pulled her rubber gloves off from the inside out, pitching them and the bloody knife onto his back." Why did she throw the gloves and knife on his back and not throw away the evidence? Wouldn't the inside of the gloves have some DNA evidence?
Comment Written 23-Aug-2023
reply by the author on 23-Aug-2023
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No, there wouldn't have been in useable DNA evidence from inside those gloves. They are dipped in a solution which destroys it and sealed in a bag before use. She wanted to get rid of the gloves and knife as quickly as possible, as to not have the evidence on her while she looked for a place to dispose of them. LOL. Thanks for another fine review. I appreciate YOU and your time!
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Would like to see someone give King a two star review for an error in his story. He would laugh all the way to the bank over that one.
Seems Bob still has the smitten bug for Sheila.
What an awesome twisted ending. One not foreseen. Usually it is the man who does the killing not the beautiful hit man woman.
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2022
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Would like to see someone give King a two star review for an error in his story. He would laugh all the way to the bank over that one.
Seems Bob still has the smitten bug for Sheila.
What an awesome twisted ending. One not foreseen. Usually it is the man who does the killing not the beautiful hit man woman.
Comment Written 04-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2022
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I couldn't have been more happy to see the shared sentiment on a King error, even after twenty people review and polish before it makes print. Although, I admit, it does break concentration during a read, it doesn't make good writing any less compelling or entertaining. I love when celebrated writers such as Don DeLillo, Jane Austen, James Joyce, and Charles Dickens, etc. make intentional mistakes or misuses just to punch critics in the gut. LOL. Your reviews are always special to me. All the time and effort you put out in trying to help me get better, and the kindness of going back to read my old stories that offer nothing in return. Many that I'm sure need lots of polishing for sure. Sorry for the ramble, you just bring out that side of me. Someone I could spend a whole afternoon just talking to and learning from. Thank you so much for the exceptional review! I can't thank you enough. I appreciate YOU!
Comment from AJ McCall
Whyyyyyyyyyyyy Ric?????????????!!
It started out so sweet then it just got dark. I was liking this story. How dare you end it that way! That poor guy... and I hate her now.
(I must say that I was totally not expecting that. I'm guessing she's some sort of hit woman. That is just crazy! I used up all my six stars! Shoot!)
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2020
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Whyyyyyyyyyyyy Ric?????????????!!
It started out so sweet then it just got dark. I was liking this story. How dare you end it that way! That poor guy... and I hate her now.
(I must say that I was totally not expecting that. I'm guessing she's some sort of hit woman. That is just crazy! I used up all my six stars! Shoot!)
Comment Written 01-Jul-2020
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2020
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LOL. Yes, you'll find I have many sick and twisted turns in a lot of my stories. Although, I prefer the comical side of life. Thank you, AJ, for taking time to read my story. I'm always happy to receive your reviews and comments. I hope you liked it. I appreciate you!
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You're welcome!
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
Ric Myworld, this was a very good fictional piece. I thoroughly enjoyed the descriptions used, such as:
"Hi," she said, as her long, thick lashes swept open and closed like an angel's wings in cinematic slow motion around her stunning green eyes. The gloss glistened on her moistened kiss-me lips. His heart quivered.
And, that's just one paragraph that shows excellent writing skill. The story was very interesting and kept me in check beginning to end wondering what did he actually do for work? I loved the twist in the end! Very clever writing, indeed. I look forward to reading more of your work! God bless and hugs, Susanne
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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Ric Myworld, this was a very good fictional piece. I thoroughly enjoyed the descriptions used, such as:
"Hi," she said, as her long, thick lashes swept open and closed like an angel's wings in cinematic slow motion around her stunning green eyes. The gloss glistened on her moistened kiss-me lips. His heart quivered.
And, that's just one paragraph that shows excellent writing skill. The story was very interesting and kept me in check beginning to end wondering what did he actually do for work? I loved the twist in the end! Very clever writing, indeed. I look forward to reading more of your work! God bless and hugs, Susanne
Comment Written 19-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jul-2016
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I am so honored that you have taken time to read more of my posts. Barely past the humble beginner stage, I read my first book at age 37 and my second at 47. I have been a member of Fan Story going on three years, and before that, I barely knew the difference between a noun and a verb. Well, a little more than that, but not much. Minimal grammar or correct punctuation beyond basic stops and so on. I thought, why should I, when there are others who can do it for me. Classmates did my school work, and I always had a secretary to do my writing thereafter. I did read, and well, since the age of 5. But usually only comic books, magazines, and newspapers, or occasionally how to manuals or book chapters to learn what I needed to know. Foolish children! I thought I had the world by the tail, swinging it for all it was worth, an amusement park of thrills every day. Then, I looked up to catch a glimpse of a person I didn't even know, some aging old boy who wasn't nearly as cool as he thought, who had missed most all of the really important things in life. Now, I can travel the world, be and do anything I want, and never leave the comfort of my La-Z-boy. And I'm still so lucky that a kind lady stops by and asks God to bless me, and gives me a hug. Things of which we can never get enough. Thanks a million for your fantastic reviews that have made my week a fine one. :-)
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I cannot believe that you were not always an avid reader. You seem to have exactly the right words for your descriptions that make your work so special to me. If I can see it, feel it, taste it, touch it or want it, from what I have read, it touches me and makes me want to read even more. I am a poet. Trying desperately to write in prose. Even short stories, I have tried. I don't think I have that necessary ability to create all those sensations that are required (and listed above) by me to stay interested in my work. I thought your remark about traveling the world in your La-Z-Boy was funny as all get out! But, that's what we do as writers. And, I for one, thoroughly enjoy it. God bless and hugs, Susanne
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I read probably 30,000 words a day on Fan Story, and two to three novels a week and still find time to be involved in football, and basketball five to seven days a week. But until I was 57 you couldn't catch me with a net. I was flat-footed and didn't give a quack. I lived in a dead run, always afraid I might miss something. Then, my whole life changed in 2003. Now, I'm still growing into the person I should have always been. My dear, you can write anything you want to write. You have an overabundance of talent, so as Nike says, "Just do it." And I can't wait to read it.
Many blessings, Ric :-)
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Ah, thanks so much, Ric, for the great complement! I value your input as a writer...you are too sweet! God bless and hugs, Susanne
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I cannot believe that you were not always an avid reader. You seem to have exactly the right words for your descriptions that make your work so special to me. If I can see it, feel it, taste it, touch it or want it, from what I have read, it touches me and makes me want to read even more. I am a poet. Trying desperately to write in prose. Even short stories, I have tried. I don't think I have that necessary ability to create all those sensations that are required (and listed above) by me to stay interested in my work. I thought your remark about traveling the world in your La-Z-Boy was funny as all get out! But, that's what we do as writers. And, I for one, thoroughly enjoy it. God bless and hugs, Susanne
Comment from Winslow
Dear Ric,
Wow what a stunning story with a surprise ending. I assume he worked for the DIA or CIA and was an enforcer himself. I wonder if she is a double agent or was he? Great plot and ending.
Small nit: Try and avoid ly words and inactive voice. For instance here is a suggested edit for these sections.
Afraid to look up, he prayed she wasn't just a figment of his imagination.
She was the one. That special someone of a lifetime, her touch, the way she felt, and the sweet essence of her perfume. He still dreamed about her every night. (eliminate had every chance you get if it is grammatically correct)
Warm regards,
Winslow
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2016
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Dear Ric,
Wow what a stunning story with a surprise ending. I assume he worked for the DIA or CIA and was an enforcer himself. I wonder if she is a double agent or was he? Great plot and ending.
Small nit: Try and avoid ly words and inactive voice. For instance here is a suggested edit for these sections.
Afraid to look up, he prayed she wasn't just a figment of his imagination.
She was the one. That special someone of a lifetime, her touch, the way she felt, and the sweet essence of her perfume. He still dreamed about her every night. (eliminate had every chance you get if it is grammatically correct)
Warm regards,
Winslow
Comment Written 11-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much, Winslow, for taking time to read my story. Your kind words, suggestions, and outstanding six-star review are greatly appreciated. As one of your biggest fans, I have learned so much from just reading your books, stories, and poems, and I hope some day, if I live long enough, to be able to write with such natural word flow, conciseness, and direct delivery. I appreciate YOU! :-)
Comment from Sandisan
Wow..didn't expect that twist. You play out the characters very well, building
the momentum to a pitch and then viola! you have her stab him! Very good
writing, you had me going.
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
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Wow..didn't expect that twist. You play out the characters very well, building
the momentum to a pitch and then viola! you have her stab him! Very good
writing, you had me going.
Comment Written 01-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much for taking time to read my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. :-)
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
A nice tight story about two people who haven't met since childhood, but come together at Starbucks. The girl sort of sends Bob into a tizzy as he isn't sure what smart thing to say. She seems to think he's got a mysterious job of some sort, which we don't know what is. Then, she talks with a police officer about a crime she's witnessed. Sounds like a good start to a book!!
Love the part about the mistake in the Stephen King book. I found a few in the last Harry Potter, but, again, who would criticize?
Great job, and I hope your friend was pleased you posted!
Take care,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
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A nice tight story about two people who haven't met since childhood, but come together at Starbucks. The girl sort of sends Bob into a tizzy as he isn't sure what smart thing to say. She seems to think he's got a mysterious job of some sort, which we don't know what is. Then, she talks with a police officer about a crime she's witnessed. Sounds like a good start to a book!!
Love the part about the mistake in the Stephen King book. I found a few in the last Harry Potter, but, again, who would criticize?
Great job, and I hope your friend was pleased you posted!
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment Written 01-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much, Rhonda, for taking time to read my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. I just like to have fun with my stories. No, not pretending to kill people, just playing with different emotions people have to deal with. I'm glad you enjoyed it. :-)
Comment from AmeliaCanton
This was really good. I would love to keep reading this if it were a book. I want to know more about the characters and their lives. This was very interesting to read and I am excited to read more of your work.
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
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This was really good. I would love to keep reading this if it were a book. I want to know more about the characters and their lives. This was very interesting to read and I am excited to read more of your work.
Comment Written 01-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much, Amelia Canton, for taking time to read my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. I like to give readers just enough to make them want more and force them to use their own imagination as to where the story is going. Also, now that I've set the stage, I can make it into a book it I choose. I'm glad you liked it. :-)
Comment from robina1978
An excellent photo that complements your story perfectly. Amazing how you made this up, on request. Bob and Sheila meet out of the blue. She had always been his childhood sweetheart. They have lunch and then go away together. She stabbed him with a knife. I smiled when you wrote that Stephen King will not get down-rated for a mistake.
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
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An excellent photo that complements your story perfectly. Amazing how you made this up, on request. Bob and Sheila meet out of the blue. She had always been his childhood sweetheart. They have lunch and then go away together. She stabbed him with a knife. I smiled when you wrote that Stephen King will not get down-rated for a mistake.
Comment Written 01-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much, Robina1978, for taking time to read my story. Your kind words and generous review are greatly appreciated. Their meeting sure did seem to be out of the blue, and was a happy time for him at first. Of course, now we know that it wasn't an accidental meeting. Whatever Bob's new job was put him in serious danger, and Sheila turns out to be the exterminator sent to dispose of him. I like writing stories that leave a lot up to the reader's imagination resembling those old time movies and books that left us hanging to figure them out on our own, with a twist of new. Thanks, again. :-)
