Astatula (Final Edition)
Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "Texas Heat"A young boy tries to turn his life around.Can he?
19 total reviews
Comment from Sylvia Page
Mentally, I returned back ... Try, mentally, I returned.
Hi Brett,
Loved the story. Are children disciplined in this manner in this day and age? Some say it is a good way of bringing up children. I think there must be a more humane way. I would rather be stern but explain why it is wrong to fight. Showing love is a better way. Make them feel ashamed.
Regards,
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
  |
Mentally, I returned back ... Try, mentally, I returned.
Hi Brett,
Loved the story. Are children disciplined in this manner in this day and age? Some say it is a good way of bringing up children. I think there must be a more humane way. I would rather be stern but explain why it is wrong to fight. Showing love is a better way. Make them feel ashamed.
Regards,
Comment Written 08-May-2018
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
-
Appreciate you taking the time to read and review this portion of Cody's story.
Comment from Liz O'Neill
So you found another way to keep the reader hanging in there with "baited breath" What a great technique. You really dragged this out and it is perfect to mimic how it actually is perceived by a child in such a situation. I think we all felt vicarial visceral pain. The characters remained true to their roles. I'm glad this is over. I'm glad I caught this chapter. Well written.
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
|
So you found another way to keep the reader hanging in there with "baited breath" What a great technique. You really dragged this out and it is perfect to mimic how it actually is perceived by a child in such a situation. I think we all felt vicarial visceral pain. The characters remained true to their roles. I'm glad this is over. I'm glad I caught this chapter. Well written.
Comment Written 08-May-2018
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
-
Glad you enjoyed this portion of Cody's story. Appreciate you taking the time to read it and write a review.
Comment from Deniz22
Background
For 10 years I was acutely abused by my biological sperm donor before being adopted (my (typo) by) the Sheriff of Astatula. Now a Freshman at the University of Texas, I reflect back on my life. Enjoy! - Cody
Good job,
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
 |
Background
For 10 years I was acutely abused by my biological sperm donor before being adopted (my (typo) by) the Sheriff of Astatula. Now a Freshman at the University of Texas, I reflect back on my life. Enjoy! - Cody
Good job,
Comment Written 08-May-2018
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
-
Appreciate the six stars.
Comment from Henry King
This is an excellent continuation of a coming of age story. Cody, the boy, has been discovered lying and fighting to family and a friend has repercussions. He is in his room receiving swats from a paddle by his step-father and told he has to write why he shouldn't lie and fight. The thrust of the story is the aftermath of misbehaving. Well done.
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
|
This is an excellent continuation of a coming of age story. Cody, the boy, has been discovered lying and fighting to family and a friend has repercussions. He is in his room receiving swats from a paddle by his step-father and told he has to write why he shouldn't lie and fight. The thrust of the story is the aftermath of misbehaving. Well done.
Comment Written 08-May-2018
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
-
Glad you enjoyed this portion of Cody's story. Appreciate your continue support.
-
You are welcome.
Comment from Phillip C Kuhn
The only criticism I have is that in your description you have the word my and I think you meant to put by, other then that is was good, nostalgic from the punishment I would get growing up, never a good time
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
|
The only criticism I have is that in your description you have the word my and I think you meant to put by, other then that is was good, nostalgic from the punishment I would get growing up, never a good time
Comment Written 08-May-2018
reply by the author on 12-May-2018
-
Glad you enjoyed this portion of Cody's story. Appreciate you taking the time to read it and write a review.
Comment from Harry Smith
I always smile when I see this author's work appear. The reader is interested from beginning to end as usual and the chapter is exceptionally well written as always and such a plesure to read.
reply by the author on 08-May-2018
|
I always smile when I see this author's work appear. The reader is interested from beginning to end as usual and the chapter is exceptionally well written as always and such a plesure to read.
Comment Written 06-May-2018
reply by the author on 08-May-2018
-
Always appreciate your comments, support, and reviews.
Comment from meeshu
so well written, Brett. not to fixate on the spanking but your write brought me a memory. I was 13 and received a "Blister" (family talk for spank w/ metal yardstick). I took it and did not even wince. my mother later told me, that was the day she realized she had lost control and needed to change her tactics. thanks for the memories.........meeshu
reply by the author on 07-May-2018
|
so well written, Brett. not to fixate on the spanking but your write brought me a memory. I was 13 and received a "Blister" (family talk for spank w/ metal yardstick). I took it and did not even wince. my mother later told me, that was the day she realized she had lost control and needed to change her tactics. thanks for the memories.........meeshu
Comment Written 06-May-2018
reply by the author on 07-May-2018
-
Glad you enjoyed this portion of Cody's story. Just trying to write it real to life. Appreciate your comments and support. As well as the review.
Comment from Almahar826
I am new to this site, just starting back up but it seems you have yourself a really great book/story going that I know people who read it and enjoy it!
reply by the author on 06-May-2018
|
I am new to this site, just starting back up but it seems you have yourself a really great book/story going that I know people who read it and enjoy it!
Comment Written 06-May-2018
reply by the author on 06-May-2018
-
Welcome back to FanStory. I invite you to ride along as the rest of this story unfolds. I am currently in the process of final editing this book and readying it for publication. You are correct. Those who read about Cody just can't seem to get enough of him. So far, this book has led to two others, and several short stories, being written about Cody and his escapades.
Comment from apky
This chapter was intense and emotional. I like how you make the ready get it that the punishment was justified and neither the sheriff nor Cody enjoyed it, but a lesson was taught and understood.
(In case you're wondering, Although we had our shining moments, some of which I will detail more about later in this book, Matt and I never fought again.) ~ Brett, I felt that giving the reader this info here ruins the enjoyment of the subsequent paras where you're still writing about the punishment and the making up between Cody and the sheriff. You could move this right to the end of the story, as a sort of just-in-case-you-wonder sort of closure.
reply by the author on 06-May-2018
|
This chapter was intense and emotional. I like how you make the ready get it that the punishment was justified and neither the sheriff nor Cody enjoyed it, but a lesson was taught and understood.
(In case you're wondering, Although we had our shining moments, some of which I will detail more about later in this book, Matt and I never fought again.) ~ Brett, I felt that giving the reader this info here ruins the enjoyment of the subsequent paras where you're still writing about the punishment and the making up between Cody and the sheriff. You could move this right to the end of the story, as a sort of just-in-case-you-wonder sort of closure.
Comment Written 06-May-2018
reply by the author on 06-May-2018
-
I like your idea, and eliminated it all together. Keep them marvelous recommendations coming!
Comment from Artasylum
I love the Artwork. I love your words and (having been spanked too many times to count. I love that he got his revelation and hopefully learned his lesson... yours, diana
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2018
|
I love the Artwork. I love your words and (having been spanked too many times to count. I love that he got his revelation and hopefully learned his lesson... yours, diana
Comment Written 05-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 06-Apr-2018
-
Glad you enjoyed this portion of Cody's story. Appreciate you taking the time to read it and to write a review.
