Comment from AnnaLinda

Excellent

Jax,

Thank you so much for your patriotic senryu reminder to us all!
Your "democracy rocks" first line not only conveys a strong message,
but I enjoyed that assonance and consonance.

Each line stands on its own and together they
make for a powerful and impacting poem and message.

Lovely presentation as well...such a high price paid for
our freedoms...

Linda

 Comment Written 13-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 13-Nov-2016

Thanks for your kind comments and excellent review.
Jax

Comment from rjuselius

Excellent

this is an important social commentary dear jaxpoet! i love the message becuase we sometimes forget that we are free becuase so many lives were lost from trying to reach freedom.
thank you for sharing!
blessings!
rebekka x

 Comment Written 13-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 13-Nov-2016

We do forget. The vets get a dirty deal. I hope that changes.thanks for taking the time to review my work. another blessing. great way to start the day.

Stay blessed
Jax

Comment from l.raven

Excellent

Hi Jax, I think of them everyday...these are men and women who gave their lives so I could live....I love your poem...and the picture is beautiful...love Linda xxoo

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2016

Thanks so much for your wonderful comment. God bless the vets
Thanks jax

reply by l.raven on 12-Nov-2016

you are so welcome...xxoo Linda

Comment from Irish Rain

Excellent

Yes, we actually shook hands with a vet outside Walmart, but my entire family is military, so I'm constantly around vets. Amen to your lovely poem! Blessings...

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2016

Thanks for the read and comments. The blessings too.
Stay Blessed
Jax

Comment from Thomas Bowling

Excellent

A great example of a difficult style. Boy, did I find out what a tight knit group Haiku writers are. I posted a poem today, "The Two Become One." It set off a firestorm of criticism.

Most readers were so involved in counting words and studying mechanics that I don't think they read the poem.

Do you know the history of Arlington?

It was the home of Robert E Lee. Lincoln wanted to punish lee. so as soon as the property was captured he build Arlinton. He buried soldiers right up to the front door.

Lee's wife still lived in the house. She went insane from visions of dead soldiers in her home.

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2016

I Have not figured these out either. I am studying them. some on them make no sense to me. I read "two become one" Man did you start a shit storm. I got the same thing when I started writing them one woman sent me a lot of info on the rules. it was a big help. Dean did a super job with his lesson I am going to print it when I get home. There a lot of great folks on this site that are read to help. Thanks for the read and comment. also the the history note. who would of thought that old Abe would get in last licks

Thanks again
Jax

Comment from Joan E.

Excellent

Thank you for your timely tribute and reminder to be grateful. I did not realize 400,000 are buried at Arlington--we pay such a high price for Democracy, we must remember to value it! Cheers- Joan

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2016

Thank you for your kind comments. the vets are treated so poorly. As a country we should be ashamed. we treat outsiders better than we treat our vets.
Jax

Comment from Joy Graham

Excellent

I like the theme of this senryu :) I did a whole series of Remembrance poems leading up to Remembrance Day, I even attended a Remembrance Day service. But, silly me forgot to thank a vet until I was out of the building :(

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2016

I just read number 11; your the best. I pleased that you liked my verse. it seems like a pittance compared to your effort.Thanks Jax

reply by Joy Graham on 12-Nov-2016

It's good that we share the Remembrance theme together. I'm just kicking myself for not speaking to the veteran and military members that attended our service.

reply by the author on 12-Nov-2016

Don't be to hard on yourself. you did much more than most. I know what you did, I'm a vet, and I love you for it.
Thanks Jax

Comment from mvbrooks

Excellent

Interesting use of the number in Arlington as a subliminal reminder of the cost of freedom. It fits well with the urging to support "with gusto" as these war dead supported us with gusto. Great tribute to those who sacrificed and a reminder of the best way to honor their actions.

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2016

Thanks for your thoughtful comment. to many people forget those that gave it all.
Jax

Comment from Bill O'Bier

Excellent

You bet and a great tribute you've written my friend. We just need to weather this storm that going now. I enjoyed the flow you used. Thanks so much for creating this piece. All the best to you.

Bill~

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2016

Thanks Bill. Hopefully when the storm stops ends the grass will grow greener. When you look past the vicious the rhetoric from the worst to candidates ever we ended up with what we have. I think he will end up being a true centrist.He spent a long time as a democrat now he is a republican. I hope that will end the hateful feud that has demolished the democratic process. As I write this, I find the tune "Storms never last for ever" I hope that's the way. Thanks so much for the review.
Jax

Heading for your site, want to see your stuffff

Comment from Pantygynt

Excellent

We have heard a lot about democracy this last week. Democracy was was certainly what those 400,000 fought and died for, and democracy will put Trump in the White House in the New Year. Can we deduce from that the 400,000 would be in agreement with your election result? An interesting question that I am not going to attempt to answer. More interesting to me is to see the rapidity with which the grosser statements made on the way to his success are getting watered down.

This is the best part of democracy, the freedom of the public to bring their opinions to bear, way beyond the formal ballot. I would like to bet that not a single stone or brick of that wall will ever get laid. It will become a metaphor perhaps for tighter border control and that is the most that any republican can hope for.

 Comment Written 12-Nov-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Nov-2016

I think they would all like it. they protected a democracy not an ideology. The democracy lives. It will be interesting what happens in the years to come. I hope this unowned outsider who has no allegiance to either party get the congress to work for the best of the country. By the way. I was hoping you would comment on the senryu, your analytics are always the best and i would like to better understand this form. Thanks for the read and comments.

All the best Jax