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Viewing comments for Chapter 35 "Water"
Free verse poems

26 total reviews 
Comment from ~Dovey
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Hi Carol,

You've done an awesome job with your prose poem. I've learned that it is never too late for Potlatch lol I don't always get my post in on Saturday either. I love all the alliteration in this piece, it lends a musical quality, like the tinkling of the water you describe.

I'm not sure if you've read in the Forum about Potlatch - if you get a chance, please stop by. Jan has started a multi-author book of poems in tribute to Mikey, who has decided he's ready to pass on the baton. Please join us in adding to the book if you'd like. All the details are in the forum, I'll be happy to help you with adding to the book if you need instructions.

Kim

 Comment Written 03-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 05-Feb-2017
    I just can't quite live by the same time scales as most other people, lol. Well, I am pretty busy. I really wanted to try to make this one more "poetic", if you know what I mean. I must take a look at that book for Mikey - he deserves it!

    Carol
Comment from winnona
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A well-written piece. The words flowed well line to line combining easily and forming the message of the poem for the reader. The artwork completed the piece well.

 Comment Written 03-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
    Thank you, it was a fun (and different) write for me,
    Carol
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
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Very good prose poem... poetic wording and a clear image for us readers. I can picture it all in my mind.

Love these phrases:

leaping in liquid joy
Ocean's massive mystery

 Comment Written 03-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
    Thank you, I was trying to make it poetic, and to make it feel like the creek itself - flowing rapidly along.

    Carol
reply by Phyllis Stewart on 04-Feb-2017
    You succeeded beautifully. :)
Comment from rama devi
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

What a poignant and evocative closing. I enjoyed this immensely dear...the fluid flow (apropos!) and the lovely resonances (especially S sounds). My favorite lines:

I'll soon become those silver, silent tides; blend into green-brimmed breakers; mingle with salted sweeps and rolling swells, ending in raucous rush up steep-sloping beaches.


Fantastic Prose-poem.

Enjoyed!

Love,
rd


 Comment Written 02-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
    Thank you so much! It was kind of fun "being" the stream, and trying to get the words to match the streams rapid, liquid flow. Ordinarily I might not lean so hard on alliteration, but hey...! A stream is just like that!

    love,
    C
reply by rama devi on 03-Feb-2017
    Yeah! Sounds like a fun one to write. Let it flow and glow, dear. Hugs, rd
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
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Wow the personification of water is exceptionally done. You have taken us on a journey of different scenes and flows depending on the rush of the water and the area it is in. Very well done

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 Comment Written 02-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
    Thanks so much, Barb, better late than never, eh? Lol. I enjoyed it but it took me time as I had to let it sit for hours at a time,

    Carol
Comment from LIJ Red
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The Song of the Chattahoochee used to be required reading in my school, back before all regional traditions were outlawed. Just missing old days and faces this evening. Looks like you mastered the elusive prosepoem.

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 Comment Written 02-Feb-2017


reply by the author on 02-Feb-2017
    Thanks, Red. Honestly, I worked on this for the past 3-4 days. The form is indeed elusive! I appreciate your words here,

    Carol