The River
A Shakespearean Sonnet for the contest32 total reviews
Comment from His Grayness
Truly outstanding and fully deserving six stars, I'm clearly short of. This is really delightful and very educational as well. The packaging of this work is brilliant and there's nothing I could suggest to improve this lovely work! HIS GRAYNESS
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Truly outstanding and fully deserving six stars, I'm clearly short of. This is really delightful and very educational as well. The packaging of this work is brilliant and there's nothing I could suggest to improve this lovely work! HIS GRAYNESS
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Very many thanks for your review, Vance, and your suggestion of six-worthiness. Best wishes, Tony.
Comment from Mustang Patty
Thank you for sharing this lovely sonnet. Your words flow smoothly, and the meter of the sonnet has been fulfilled. The artwork you chose to compliment the piece only added to its beauty and pace.
~patty~
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Thank you for sharing this lovely sonnet. Your words flow smoothly, and the meter of the sonnet has been fulfilled. The artwork you chose to compliment the piece only added to its beauty and pace.
~patty~
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Very many thanks for your review, Patty.
Comment from krys123
Cheers, Tony;
-I enjoyed reading this wonderfully composed Shakespearean sonnet about a river that now I am more familiar with and I have ever been before. I can witness the fawn drinking from the river and the wobbler in the tree being basked by the rays of the sun while in its hidden environment. I can visualize the growth from the ferns that tickle the rivers and by the bank. All of this imagery is beautifully crystallized in your poem.
-The structural and technique of your sonnet meets all the requirements necessary both in meter and rhyme in the enjambment flow smoothly throughout the writing without a hiccup or a syntactical break in the reading and the understanding of this poem.
-Good luck in the contest and take care and have a good one is I enjoyed this 1 very much.
Alex
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Cheers, Tony;
-I enjoyed reading this wonderfully composed Shakespearean sonnet about a river that now I am more familiar with and I have ever been before. I can witness the fawn drinking from the river and the wobbler in the tree being basked by the rays of the sun while in its hidden environment. I can visualize the growth from the ferns that tickle the rivers and by the bank. All of this imagery is beautifully crystallized in your poem.
-The structural and technique of your sonnet meets all the requirements necessary both in meter and rhyme in the enjambment flow smoothly throughout the writing without a hiccup or a syntactical break in the reading and the understanding of this poem.
-Good luck in the contest and take care and have a good one is I enjoyed this 1 very much.
Alex
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Very many thanks for your detailed and comprehensive review, Alex. I appreciate your kind words and the six stars. Tony.
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Beautiful poem. I read it several times to get the full meaning of the piece. I love the rhyme scheme, and the flow and meter are very nice. Your descriptive words are wonderful in their complexity and imagery. The whole poem speaks to me, but the last two lines, shout out the loudest. "All life enjoys the river's endless song. Eternity is now, but moves along." Very deep and wise. Thanks for the joyful storyline of the river. This is very well-written.
Take care, Jesse
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Beautiful poem. I read it several times to get the full meaning of the piece. I love the rhyme scheme, and the flow and meter are very nice. Your descriptive words are wonderful in their complexity and imagery. The whole poem speaks to me, but the last two lines, shout out the loudest. "All life enjoys the river's endless song. Eternity is now, but moves along." Very deep and wise. Thanks for the joyful storyline of the river. This is very well-written.
Take care, Jesse
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much for this six-star review and your kind comments. I'm delighted to hear that the closing couplet worked well.
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Yes, it did.
Comment from Mark Valentine
Rivers, of course, are perfect images for conveying the idea that there is permanence behind the constant change (the water moves, but the river stays the same). You last line "Eternity is now, but moves along" is as poetic an expression of that idea as I've ever seen.
Your contrast between the river, as it exists before dawn, and the river once the "galoots" arrive, seems to me to be a microcosm of the earth pre-and post our arrival on the planet. It underscores the idea that we are fleeting (as individuals and as a species) when viewed from the perspective of eternity.
The imagery, the language (loved "hoo-eet", the structure, and the subject matter, all give this one a classic feel. Could have been written by Keats.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Rivers, of course, are perfect images for conveying the idea that there is permanence behind the constant change (the water moves, but the river stays the same). You last line "Eternity is now, but moves along" is as poetic an expression of that idea as I've ever seen.
Your contrast between the river, as it exists before dawn, and the river once the "galoots" arrive, seems to me to be a microcosm of the earth pre-and post our arrival on the planet. It underscores the idea that we are fleeting (as individuals and as a species) when viewed from the perspective of eternity.
The imagery, the language (loved "hoo-eet", the structure, and the subject matter, all give this one a classic feel. Could have been written by Keats.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Six stars and a comparison with Keats! What more could a poet ask?
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Hello my friend this is well written and very beautiful you have accomplished this form very well such a peaceful feeling to this I enjoyed good luck regards Jill
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Hello my friend this is well written and very beautiful you have accomplished this form very well such a peaceful feeling to this I enjoyed good luck regards Jill
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Many thanks, Jill. So glad you enjoyed it. Tony
Comment from rosehill (Wendy)
Can't think of a finer place to use one of my sixes. The writing flows as smoothly as your river. The visuals, punctuated by aptly framed references are so clear. It is a shame that the editor's notes are even necessary, but alas, a classical education is a thing of a past. Thank you for indulging my need for the sweet cream of beautiful analogy. - rosehill (Wendy)
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Can't think of a finer place to use one of my sixes. The writing flows as smoothly as your river. The visuals, punctuated by aptly framed references are so clear. It is a shame that the editor's notes are even necessary, but alas, a classical education is a thing of a past. Thank you for indulging my need for the sweet cream of beautiful analogy. - rosehill (Wendy)
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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A review to warm the heart! Thank you so much, Wendy. Six stars, too - the icing on the cake (or perhaps the cream in this case!)
Comment from strandregs
I think we can call this a modern sonnette
and you an intrepid sonnette explorrer.
jumping in a river never explored before by shaky.
love your galoots and eternity
and fresh eye.:-)) Z.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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I think we can call this a modern sonnette
and you an intrepid sonnette explorrer.
jumping in a river never explored before by shaky.
love your galoots and eternity
and fresh eye.:-)) Z.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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A review that says much in few words. I'm honoured!
Comment from marybell1
I enjoyed reading your informative sonnet "The River" All your rhyming and syllables were correct. I find the sonnet most difficult. I can get the rhyming, but fall down with my '/. A lovely photo.
Best of luck.
Marybell1.
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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I enjoyed reading your informative sonnet "The River" All your rhyming and syllables were correct. I find the sonnet most difficult. I can get the rhyming, but fall down with my '/. A lovely photo.
Best of luck.
Marybell1.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 30-Mar-2017
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Very many thanks for your review, Marybell. I appreciate your kind words. Tony.
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Wow this is extremely sad and yet the third paragraph takes it to the joy of noises of being carefree and having fun. Eternity is now, true but still it moves on...nicely done
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2017
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Wow this is extremely sad and yet the third paragraph takes it to the joy of noises of being carefree and having fun. Eternity is now, true but still it moves on...nicely done
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 29-Mar-2017
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Many thanks for your review of The River, Barb, and for pointing out the parts you liked best. All the best, Tony
