Echoes of Artistry
Viewing comments for Chapter 1 "Homer"NaPoWriMo 2017
19 total reviews
Comment from Sasha
The Pleiades style is a completely new form for me. I get so confused with all the different forms and yet I am still able to know what I like. I will leave the critiquing of form to those that know what they are doing. I enjoyed this poem very much and loved reading The Iliad and The Odyssey in school. Excellent work with this poem and loved your informative notes too. My goodness, how do you find the time to do so much research as well as participate in this amazing endeavor? I look forward to reading your next post. You are a marvelously talented poet and I enjoy your work very much.
reply by the author on 11-Apr-2017
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The Pleiades style is a completely new form for me. I get so confused with all the different forms and yet I am still able to know what I like. I will leave the critiquing of form to those that know what they are doing. I enjoyed this poem very much and loved reading The Iliad and The Odyssey in school. Excellent work with this poem and loved your informative notes too. My goodness, how do you find the time to do so much research as well as participate in this amazing endeavor? I look forward to reading your next post. You are a marvelously talented poet and I enjoy your work very much.
Comment Written 11-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 11-Apr-2017
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I got so hooked on the Pleiades poems when we were doing them Poetry Potlatch a couple of months ago. Just prior to taking up this project I worked on a book with Pantygynt titled, "Pantheon of Pleiades." If you enjoy Greek mythology you may want to check out those selections, too. Pleiades are like potato chips, you can't have just one lol We had to exorcise them out of our system so we could move on to other things. It has become one of my favorite styles. I love to read and research, especially historical things. My odd brand of fun, I suppose lol Thanks for the awesome comments.
Kim
Comment from Rlegel99
Poem about Homer. Enjoyed the rhyme and rhythm. The artwork works nicely with the work. I couldn't tackle long works during my time at the Final Four either.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2017
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Poem about Homer. Enjoyed the rhyme and rhythm. The artwork works nicely with the work. I couldn't tackle long works during my time at the Final Four either.
Comment Written 05-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2017
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Hi Rlegel,
The Pleiades is one of my favorites. I just finished up a project with Pantygynt titled Pantheon of Pleiades, which is essentially A-Z Pleiades on classical deities from mythology. The form is outstanding for that time period. They are in my portfolio. That project was a lot of fun. Thanks for the nice review.
Kim
Comment from alf collier
Wow, I am so learning new forms since I came back to this site!! This is another I have not seen before, but after reading your write, I am enchanted, and must try this one. You have done Homer proud... and I think we all have that inner urge to write an epic (smile)
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2017
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Wow, I am so learning new forms since I came back to this site!! This is another I have not seen before, but after reading your write, I am enchanted, and must try this one. You have done Homer proud... and I think we all have that inner urge to write an epic (smile)
Comment Written 03-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2017
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Hi Alf,
I just finished a project with Pantygynt. We did a book of Pleiades poetry titled, "Pantheon of Pleiades." You'll find several selections in my portfolio that are in this shared book. They are all based on mythology. You might find them interesting, with lots of notes, too. Thank you for the grand review. Let me warn you, Pleiades are addictive to write lol we did the Pantheon project to exorcise them out of our system! lol It's like potato chips, you can't have just one!
Kim
Comment from BeasPeas
Great job, Kim. I enjoyed reading the poem and your author's notes. It's hard to imagine an artist would paint such a fine portrait and not sign it. Just that it survived is testament to the artist, especially if he wasn't well known. Your poem is well done, concise. I must tell you I admire so much your versatility as indicated in these sentences:
"One day I'll be brave and tackle an epic poem. However, today is not that day, as I am swamped with Alaska Nanook Hockey banquet set up and the banquet itself." Let's see--hockey banquet vs. writing an epic poem--is there anything you can't do? LOL! Marilyn
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2017
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Great job, Kim. I enjoyed reading the poem and your author's notes. It's hard to imagine an artist would paint such a fine portrait and not sign it. Just that it survived is testament to the artist, especially if he wasn't well known. Your poem is well done, concise. I must tell you I admire so much your versatility as indicated in these sentences:
"One day I'll be brave and tackle an epic poem. However, today is not that day, as I am swamped with Alaska Nanook Hockey banquet set up and the banquet itself." Let's see--hockey banquet vs. writing an epic poem--is there anything you can't do? LOL! Marilyn
Comment Written 03-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2017
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Hi Marilyn,
I love this review, you made me laugh with that last sentence. Yep! My kryptonite is laundry - who manages to wash, dry, fold and put away all in one day? lol Not me, usually. I loved the artwork, too. It is amazing that it survived all this time. We had a fantastic time at the banquet, but I have to say, if it could go wrong, it did. A comedy of errors almost. (The setup part, that is.) We arrived and the catering staff was just starting to set the room, so we had to wait. We completed some of our other tasks just outside the door to the room. Our event chair lead called to say she was at the ER (she's ok) and wouldn't make it. She was working the door with one of our other board members, who later sent a message stating he was sick and wouldn't make it. I ended up working the door with our newest volunteer, and she did fantastic. We managed to get people to their reserved tables and our other board members arrived in time to help direct the crowd. (They had gone home to change and came back.) While we were setting up we were told that the women's restroom was out of order and they would try and get it fixed. (Alternative was to go all the way down the hall past the restaurant.) We persevered and had a great time, and I got lucky, in that the restroom finally did open up, though I have no clue whether or not that happened before the guests began to arrive. I may have been able to tackle an epic poem in that timeframe lol we got home around midnight after the banquet was over and we packed everything up. I was also finalizing our online Jersey auction: payments and handing out the jerseys. What a fun night! :) Hey, that day could be an epic poem! lol
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I give you so much credit for doing all that. It proves the old adage that if something CAN go wrong it will. You have fortitude.
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Thanks! :) I never give up easily lol somehow, I'm determined to make it work.
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Despite your busy life at the hockey you still managed all these notes plus a delightful Pleiades poem. Do you google between goals, I wonder. lol
cheers,
valda
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2017
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Despite your busy life at the hockey you still managed all these notes plus a delightful Pleiades poem. Do you google between goals, I wonder. lol
cheers,
valda
Comment Written 03-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2017
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Hi Valda,
I did the research in the morning while James was still asleep. I loaded the car with all the things I needed for the banquet; centerpieces, etc... and wrote the poem while he was in the shower after I had gotten ready. I took my laptop with me hoping I'd have a little time between the set-up and the banquet beginning, but then two of our main helpers weren't there, so that didn't happen lol so, it was almost midnight when we got home and I finally had time to sit down and post. Anything after 8 pm for me posts into the next day, because my time zone is 4 hours earlier than EST, which is where Fan Story is located. Thanks for the fun review. :) Sadly, the season is over... no more goals until the fall.
Kim
Comment from rjuselius
this is a brilliant pleiades poem dear kim! i thoroughly enjoyed the journey you took to describe a poet who deserves recognition. nice one my friend!
thank you for sharing!
good luck!
blessings!
rebekka x
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2017
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this is a brilliant pleiades poem dear kim! i thoroughly enjoyed the journey you took to describe a poet who deserves recognition. nice one my friend!
thank you for sharing!
good luck!
blessings!
rebekka x
Comment Written 02-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2017
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Hi rebekka,
Thanks for the wonderful comments. I'm so glad you enjoyed Homer. I think I'll be back to explore him more in a lengthier piece soon.
Kim
Comment from Irish Rain
Well, I have to admit my ignorance, I've never read Homer. BUT...I've read Dovey, who wrote about Homer, and I tremendously enjoyed her!! Loved this, love the form, great picture!! Blessings...
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Well, I have to admit my ignorance, I've never read Homer. BUT...I've read Dovey, who wrote about Homer, and I tremendously enjoyed her!! Loved this, love the form, great picture!! Blessings...
Comment Written 02-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Hi Irish!
Thank you so much for this wonderful review. I love the admission and your enthusiastic comments. Next up is Blake... stay tuned! :)
Kim
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I will....looking forward to it!!!
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I just posted it :)
Comment from CD Richards
A very pleasing pleiades you've created here Kim. In the painting, he looks so contemplative and serene, which makes the phrase "hit a Homer" seem rather unnecessary and unkind. Well done, can't wait see what you've got for us next. Craig
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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A very pleasing pleiades you've created here Kim. In the painting, he looks so contemplative and serene, which makes the phrase "hit a Homer" seem rather unnecessary and unkind. Well done, can't wait see what you've got for us next. Craig
Comment Written 02-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Hi Craig,
No, hitting Homer would be unkind. Perhaps that's why baseball players don't subscribe to poetry? lol Thanks for taking the time to read and review. I'm searching for inspiration today... I can't wait to see what's next either ;) I appreciate the great comments.
Kim
Comment from Apostle Janos
I like the poetic form that you chose, the image and the subject. In my humble opinion however it is a bit vague and leaves me wanting more. I can see a parallel between Homer and Milton as they were both said to be blind, and in general all artists and creators, even the gods, were handicapped in some way, like the Dwarfs, Ptah, Hephaestus, Homer, other mythological heroes... Although Homer in reality was probably not really blind. Anyway this stuff is very interesting and I'm getting off-topic :).
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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I like the poetic form that you chose, the image and the subject. In my humble opinion however it is a bit vague and leaves me wanting more. I can see a parallel between Homer and Milton as they were both said to be blind, and in general all artists and creators, even the gods, were handicapped in some way, like the Dwarfs, Ptah, Hephaestus, Homer, other mythological heroes... Although Homer in reality was probably not really blind. Anyway this stuff is very interesting and I'm getting off-topic :).
Comment Written 02-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Hi Apostle Yannaras:
I enjoy the Pleiades style for its brevity and impact. I want to come back and revisit Homer again, as I find that time period interesting. I'm toying with another idea in dactylic hexameter, once I get the hang of it. I've never tried to write in that meter before. That will take me longer than a day, though. Thanks for the encouraging review. I'll bring more detail into that epic write.
Kim
Comment from rama devi
Hi dear Kim.
Wonderful short ode...with fine alliteration, fine flow, good substance and references. Great notes too! Outstanding rhyme and slant rhymes. Just one minor hiccup in flow for me, grammatically, in these lines:
Heroic were the tales
Homer told -- when ship sails
his Odyssey unfolds.
Alternative suggestion:
Heroic were the tales
Homer told. When ship sails,
his Odyssey unfolds.
But also, the tense shift is mildly disconcerting as well. It should be past tense, I believe.
Heroic were the tales
Homer told -- when ship sailed
his Odyssey unfolded.
Obviously, unfolded no longer rhymes, so maybe try some alternative synonyms there?
Poetic license permits the lapse, so five stars in spite of it. Still, I strongly recommend revision of the tenses.
Love,
rd
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Hi dear Kim.
Wonderful short ode...with fine alliteration, fine flow, good substance and references. Great notes too! Outstanding rhyme and slant rhymes. Just one minor hiccup in flow for me, grammatically, in these lines:
Heroic were the tales
Homer told -- when ship sails
his Odyssey unfolds.
Alternative suggestion:
Heroic were the tales
Homer told. When ship sails,
his Odyssey unfolds.
But also, the tense shift is mildly disconcerting as well. It should be past tense, I believe.
Heroic were the tales
Homer told -- when ship sailed
his Odyssey unfolded.
Obviously, unfolded no longer rhymes, so maybe try some alternative synonyms there?
Poetic license permits the lapse, so five stars in spite of it. Still, I strongly recommend revision of the tenses.
Love,
rd
Comment Written 02-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Hi rd,
Thanks for all of the wonderful advice, rd. I made the grammatical edits already. I'll have to mull over the rest. I really appreciate the time and energy you spend to help me make my writing the best it can be.
*hugs*
Kim
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:-))) Hugs
