Reviews from

Poems By AnnieDawn

Viewing comments for Chapter 36 "Lost In A Snowstorm"
My book of poems and stories

30 total reviews 
Comment from Bichon
Excellent
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Very well written poem. I was very interested in this topic, and I was anxious to find out the ending whilst I was reading. It is very creative to base it off a true story. I am glad the girl was found.

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 09-Sep-2017
    Thank you. I was glad she was found also because I live to write another day...lol
Comment from jaded831
Excellent
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What heart wrenching story, your poem ended sad, but I am glad the true story ended on a happy note. Your poem makes for a great entry, I can't find anything negate to say. From me you get a thumbs up. Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 09-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 09-Sep-2017
    Thanks so much for your kind words and honest review.
Comment from Ogden
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Your post shows you to be a talented poet, and an even better storyteller. What I expected to be a routine read, turned out to be a moving narrative.
Don (aka Ogden)

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 09-Sep-2017
    Thank you for your kind remarks and thoughtful review. I am so honored and really at a loss for words.
reply by Ogden on 09-Sep-2017
    You earned the rating. You'd better be able to come up with more words, just in case you decide to write another poem.
Comment from LindaJWolff
Excellent
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I've been in this place before, but it was in a car stranded in a snow storm. Very challenging upon the mind. Wonderful depiction of how one would feel in this piece of poetry! Awesome write!

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 09-Sep-2017
    I am sorry to hear you had to feel the hopelessness that this event was so apparent in this little girls life. It is a tragedy but , unfortunately, does happen. Thanks for your kind review.
Comment from nbonner
Excellent
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Such a sad ending but nicely written. The poem flowed really well and the imagery used made the poem come alive. Thank you for sharing and best wishes in the contest. N.B

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 09-Sep-2017
    Thank you for making this a positive addition to the contest. I hesitated a bit before I entered it.
Comment from Pullmanspb
Excellent
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When I read your author's comments, I sent my wishes to you that you would consider the fact that this young girl was found in a graveyard. That could add even more rear and trepidation to your quite descriptive poem.

Nice job and quite and interesting story.

Steven

 Comment Written 07-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2017
    Thanks for your kind review. Someday I may write about the event in story form. It is still so vivid in my memory. Mom found me huddled by a gravestone, and I have no idea how as you couldn't see your hand in front of your face.
reply by Pullmanspb on 08-Sep-2017
    "more rear?" When am I going to do a better job of proof reading. It should have been "...more fear."
Comment from Kerry Foley
Excellent
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Oh my goodness what a sad story. Did she die? It was unclear if she just fell asleep, or fwll asleep to die:(( You did a terrific job writing this into an ABC poem. Wonderfully done. Good luck in the contest. ~Kerry

 Comment Written 07-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 07-Sep-2017
    Thank you for your kind review and yes she did die in the poem.
reply by Kerry Foley on 07-Sep-2017
    Ohhh, how very sad. and, you are very welcome.
Comment from loismddavis
Good
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you have fulfilled the prompt by sharing a complete story in your poem--not such a happy ending. the rhyme scheme is a little odd and I would have liked some poetic elements--I did recognize some alliteration

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
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 Comment Written 06-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
    I am sorry that this poem did not meet your expectations. I am not sure how I would have improved on it to make changes that would have pleased your rating senses. I am a novice so not skilled in this and still learning. I did change the ending. I know it is sad but not all events are happy. I thank you for your honesty and for taking the time to review this poem.
Comment from humpwhistle
Excellent
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I like this poem, and the story it tells.
But I'm at odds with your decision to use the last two lines to 'solicit' emotion.
That rings 'commercial' to me.
Perhaps you could elicit similar emotion, without being so blatant?

Just a thought.

Peace, Lee

 Comment Written 06-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
    The paragraph was blatant as you said, and I took it out. I also changed a bit of the wording in the last sentence. I thank you for reviewing and for your honest opinions I value them.
Comment from tfawcus
Excellent
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Graphic intensity achieved here through your use of language. One can feel the terror and despair. The final lines give your poem very much the same emotional grip as is found in stories such as Hans Christian Andersen's The Little Matchgirl.

 Comment Written 06-Sep-2017


reply by the author on 06-Sep-2017
    Thank you for reviewing and your honesty. I have received some comments about the sadness but not all events are happy. I have an old book that is full of sad childhood events that were popular in the 1800's. Anyway thanks again.