It's In My DNA
I may be too old to change...35 total reviews
Comment from samantha0930
I really, like your poem; I find it really fun. And besides, isn't it better to overdo things than if you were to underdo?
I got tripped up in the first stanza where it says "Even I can tell/you the reasons why" since it broke the flow for "you" to be in the next line, and I feel like it would sound better in the 3rd line than in the 4th. I also just noticed you forgot to capitalize it, whereas you start every other line capitalized.
I was also a little confused why there was such a large space after the end of the poem, and thought there might be something else at the bottom of the text box, but nothing was there. Maybe you accidently had something holding down the enter key? Or maybe you wanted it that way, I'm not sure.
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2018
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I really, like your poem; I find it really fun. And besides, isn't it better to overdo things than if you were to underdo?
I got tripped up in the first stanza where it says "Even I can tell/you the reasons why" since it broke the flow for "you" to be in the next line, and I feel like it would sound better in the 3rd line than in the 4th. I also just noticed you forgot to capitalize it, whereas you start every other line capitalized.
I was also a little confused why there was such a large space after the end of the poem, and thought there might be something else at the bottom of the text box, but nothing was there. Maybe you accidently had something holding down the enter key? Or maybe you wanted it that way, I'm not sure.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2018
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Hello samantha0930,
Thank you ever so much for your complimentary and thorough review.
I have absolutely no idea why there is so much space at the end, either.
And thank you for pointing out that boggle in the first stanza = good eyes!
Thank you again!
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You're welcome :)
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I just now managed to fix most of the spaces at the end of my poem. Pretty certain that has never happened! Gremlins! :)
diane
Comment from Priest B. Brown
Pie!
How can you go wrong with pie!
Oh, I like being overdone when it comes to pie and you know I'm telling the truth because my waistline doesn't lie!
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2018
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Pie!
How can you go wrong with pie!
Oh, I like being overdone when it comes to pie and you know I'm telling the truth because my waistline doesn't lie!
Comment Written 25-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 25-Feb-2018
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Hello Priest B Brown,
Baking a mincemeat pie for my husband this afternoon! And it's not even a holiday!
Thank you for your complimentary and positive review!
Here's to pie!
Comment from Chrissy710
Hi Di , Well done and you sound like a great person who cares about everyone so if that makes you happy go for it I sometimes over- cater And have too much left over But hey then one must have enough Good luck in the contest Cheers Christine
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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Hi Di , Well done and you sound like a great person who cares about everyone so if that makes you happy go for it I sometimes over- cater And have too much left over But hey then one must have enough Good luck in the contest Cheers Christine
Comment Written 23-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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Hi Chrissy!
Thank you for your positive and complimentary review! I surely appreciate it! What a fun write!
Comment from damommy
I think it's the way we were raised. Everything must be perfect for company. I've been accused of the same thing. I've slowed down a lot, though. Company has to take what they find. LOL
I loved reading this, and you were right. It's better read aloud.
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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I think it's the way we were raised. Everything must be perfect for company. I've been accused of the same thing. I've slowed down a lot, though. Company has to take what they find. LOL
I loved reading this, and you were right. It's better read aloud.
Comment Written 23-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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Hello!
I should have added the stanza about the guest who saw our yard (I am an avid gardener) and commented,
"It's lovely,
but she tries too hard." :(
Thank you for your thoughtful review!
Comment from Cedar
This is very well written. It's evident that you invested a great deal of thought and work into this piece. And, it's also funny, thanks for making me laugh.
This one will surely be a big contender for first place. I wish you the best of luck...Bill
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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This is very well written. It's evident that you invested a great deal of thought and work into this piece. And, it's also funny, thanks for making me laugh.
This one will surely be a big contender for first place. I wish you the best of luck...Bill
Comment Written 23-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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Hello Bill!
It was a lot of fun to write this one - and laughing at myself at the same time! But I always remember the "guest" who came to visit, went on a tour of my hard work, and commented - thinking I wouldn't hear: "She tries too hard." That one hurt!
Thank you so much for your complimentary and positive review!
Comment from Zue65
Wow, nicely done and the author complied too, with the requirements of the contest. I really admire authors who can create poems at will to fit the theme of the contest and have succeeded in doing so. Thanks for sharing this excellent piece.
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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Wow, nicely done and the author complied too, with the requirements of the contest. I really admire authors who can create poems at will to fit the theme of the contest and have succeeded in doing so. Thanks for sharing this excellent piece.
Comment Written 22-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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Hello!
Thank you for your positive and complimentary review!
This was truly a fun verse to pen!
Thank you!
Comment from amada
Oh, you can come to visit me anytime! Oh those pies. For sure they enlightened me this day of staying home with the flu. A fruit salad will do nicely in my parched throat!
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2018
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Oh, you can come to visit me anytime! Oh those pies. For sure they enlightened me this day of staying home with the flu. A fruit salad will do nicely in my parched throat!
Comment Written 22-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2018
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Oh amada!
I surely would if I could! My husband came down with pneumonia last Thursday. He is only now feeling a bit better. Lots of tlc, wild rice and chicken soup, and Vernor's floats! No pies...yet, but one very soon!
Thank you for your kind review, and I hope you feel better soon!
Comment from kathleenspalding
Haha too cute! Well, if that's a fault, I wish everyone had it! ;-D I see no errors, and the only thing I could suggest is that maybe "downstairs' room" doesn't need the apostrophe?
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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Haha too cute! Well, if that's a fault, I wish everyone had it! ;-D I see no errors, and the only thing I could suggest is that maybe "downstairs' room" doesn't need the apostrophe?
Comment Written 22-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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Hello Kathleen,
Not certain how that little possessive apostrophe hitched a ride on downstairs, but I removed it!
Thank you for your complimentary and positive review!
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Great! You're welcome.
Comment from Marge Setzer
Better to overdo than to do nothing. At least your guests felt welcome, I'm sure. Who can criticize more than one choice of pie! If you didn't do all this I can guarantee you'd feel more stress. Suggestions: look for areas that need punctuation such as at the end of lines. Third from the last stanza...eliminate "simply" for a better flow. This was a fun poem to read and could become a classic. There's a lot of truth to it, a universal appeal, I think. Marge
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2018
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Better to overdo than to do nothing. At least your guests felt welcome, I'm sure. Who can criticize more than one choice of pie! If you didn't do all this I can guarantee you'd feel more stress. Suggestions: look for areas that need punctuation such as at the end of lines. Third from the last stanza...eliminate "simply" for a better flow. This was a fun poem to read and could become a classic. There's a lot of truth to it, a universal appeal, I think. Marge
Comment Written 22-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2018
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Thank you, Marge! Under hair dryer as I write! So glad you enjoyed! Intentionally eliminated end punctuation, but will definitely get rid of ?simply? once I can edit on computer!
Thank you for your thoughtful and complimentary review!
Comment from Sharon Haiste
I think this is a good entry for the 'I Am Not Perfect' writing prompt.
A clear story told in your verse. It reminds me of my Nana, she always said that if one is good, two is better.
Well done and good luck to you with this one in the competition.
Sharon
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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I think this is a good entry for the 'I Am Not Perfect' writing prompt.
A clear story told in your verse. It reminds me of my Nana, she always said that if one is good, two is better.
Well done and good luck to you with this one in the competition.
Sharon
Comment Written 22-Feb-2018
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2018
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Hello Sharon!
I think your Nana knew what she was talking about! Too funny!
Thank you for your positive and kind review!
