A Four Letter Word Called Love
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "It All Started With a Kiss"A collection of love poems.
9 total reviews
Comment from meeshu
what a great love poem, FM. she is a very lucky girl and he is lucky too . I like the verseless format, one continuous thought. very passionate.....meeshu
reply by the author on 07-May-2018
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what a great love poem, FM. she is a very lucky girl and he is lucky too . I like the verseless format, one continuous thought. very passionate.....meeshu
Comment Written 29-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 07-May-2018
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thank you for your comment. appreciate you taking the time to read it
Comment from Liz O'Neill
A nice tribute to the healthy relationship you have built. You have created clear imagery from the beginning of the meeting on the date into the future. Very nice. This is kind of a fun read. You have drawn the reader in right from the first line. Well written.
I learned how to fix my spacing. Go to edit up at the top of your poem then it will give you the poem to edit. Go to the end of the 1st line and hit enter & it will move line two in place. Then do the same for the next line. If you have any other questions...feel free to ask.
reply by the author on 07-May-2018
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A nice tribute to the healthy relationship you have built. You have created clear imagery from the beginning of the meeting on the date into the future. Very nice. This is kind of a fun read. You have drawn the reader in right from the first line. Well written.
I learned how to fix my spacing. Go to edit up at the top of your poem then it will give you the poem to edit. Go to the end of the 1st line and hit enter & it will move line two in place. Then do the same for the next line. If you have any other questions...feel free to ask.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 07-May-2018
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thanks so much for your helpful hint
Comment from Cybertron1986
These are the kinds of writing that connect both life and wonder with that touch of creativie wonder, which sparks appeal. The genuineness here touches the relative experiences of my own life, but with a different light. Thank you for sharing a beautiful piece.
reply by the author on 07-May-2018
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These are the kinds of writing that connect both life and wonder with that touch of creativie wonder, which sparks appeal. The genuineness here touches the relative experiences of my own life, but with a different light. Thank you for sharing a beautiful piece.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 07-May-2018
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glad it touched you. appreciate your comment
Comment from Poetic Friend
You expressed beautiful sentiments in this poem.
I highly suggest that you reformat the poem for a smoother read. I was going to recommend a poetic format for you, but I see another reviewer did so already.
The recipient of this poem is a lucky to have such this work written in his/her honor.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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You expressed beautiful sentiments in this poem.
I highly suggest that you reformat the poem for a smoother read. I was going to recommend a poetic format for you, but I see another reviewer did so already.
The recipient of this poem is a lucky to have such this work written in his/her honor.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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Thank you for your rating and comment. Will work on the reformat.
Comment from Harry Smith
This kept the reader interested from beginning until the end it is filled with lots and lots of imagery and emotions. The reader really enjoyed the read.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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This kept the reader interested from beginning until the end it is filled with lots and lots of imagery and emotions. The reader really enjoyed the read.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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Your rating and words very much appreciated. Thanks.
Comment from Pamusart
I agree with one of the reviewer's that I found this poem a little bit hard to follow. When I saw how he had rearranged it, it really read nicely so I think you have a really good start here. If you just reformat it that way I think you're going to get a lot of good reviews. thank you for sharing
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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I agree with one of the reviewer's that I found this poem a little bit hard to follow. When I saw how he had rearranged it, it really read nicely so I think you have a really good start here. If you just reformat it that way I think you're going to get a lot of good reviews. thank you for sharing
Comment Written 29-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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Thank you for your rating and suggestions. Will work on it.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This speaks the love affair that goes from first date to future events as it started just with a kiss and thereafter relation begins, no question of leaving the relation; well said, well done. DR ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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This speaks the love affair that goes from first date to future events as it started just with a kiss and thereafter relation begins, no question of leaving the relation; well said, well done. DR ALCREATOR
Comment Written 29-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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I much appreciate your rating and comments. Thanks so much.
Comment from Alexander Vasa
Hi, a story of love and romance, and eventually marriage. I enjoyed this story poem, and the only thing I will bring to your attention is the use of capitals when none are required, like here:
knee And popped the question
'a' doesn't need to be a capital and you do that throughout. So just another careful edit needed, and thanks for sharing your writing, Ana.
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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Hi, a story of love and romance, and eventually marriage. I enjoyed this story poem, and the only thing I will bring to your attention is the use of capitals when none are required, like here:
knee And popped the question
'a' doesn't need to be a capital and you do that throughout. So just another careful edit needed, and thanks for sharing your writing, Ana.
Comment Written 29-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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Thank you for your rating. The capital was a typing error. One which I did not catch before releasing it.
Comment from johnwilson
I enjoyed the premise of your poem. In my opinion only, I would suggest placing it in a poetic format--separating the thoughts line by line, so that the reader can easily perceive your words, eg.
Our date was coming to a speedy end;
In my thoughts I considered you only a friend,
And then you pressed your lips to mine:
That's when my heart with yours became entwined.
As time passed that proved to be true;
For the love which started as a spark steadily grew.
Ring in hand you got down on bent knee--
popped the question will you marry me?
In answer to that request here I do stand
Awaiting the moment I'll press my lips to
the man's with whom I will forever share my life
As his ever loving woman and wife.
The years which have passed by so very swiftly
Have seen us expanding into a real family.
When our daughter is old enough to date
I will to her my story relate. When she in turn
has a daughter of her own, and into a teenager has grown,
Let her know just how it all came about;
Leave her no room to harbor any doubt.
Also, I would read it over and see if you can replace words that aren't really needed, or place a word that might fit better. The other thing I didn't understand is why you placed a warning for violence on the piece? Good luck!
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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I enjoyed the premise of your poem. In my opinion only, I would suggest placing it in a poetic format--separating the thoughts line by line, so that the reader can easily perceive your words, eg.
Our date was coming to a speedy end;
In my thoughts I considered you only a friend,
And then you pressed your lips to mine:
That's when my heart with yours became entwined.
As time passed that proved to be true;
For the love which started as a spark steadily grew.
Ring in hand you got down on bent knee--
popped the question will you marry me?
In answer to that request here I do stand
Awaiting the moment I'll press my lips to
the man's with whom I will forever share my life
As his ever loving woman and wife.
The years which have passed by so very swiftly
Have seen us expanding into a real family.
When our daughter is old enough to date
I will to her my story relate. When she in turn
has a daughter of her own, and into a teenager has grown,
Let her know just how it all came about;
Leave her no room to harbor any doubt.
Also, I would read it over and see if you can replace words that aren't really needed, or place a word that might fit better. The other thing I didn't understand is why you placed a warning for violence on the piece? Good luck!
Comment Written 29-Apr-2018
reply by the author on 27-Jun-2018
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Appreciate your rating and comments. Will work on that in my rewrite.
