Redemption II
Viewing comments for Prologue "Lance is back"Lance is back
27 total reviews
Comment from Kelli Ness Rasmusson
Whoa!!! Creepy! Definitely captivating and appealing to find out if Lance can make it out of the cracked mirror.. and what will he do when he gets out.. yikes!!ð??± Excellent beginning, and tugs at your curiosity! Good job!
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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Whoa!!! Creepy! Definitely captivating and appealing to find out if Lance can make it out of the cracked mirror.. and what will he do when he gets out.. yikes!!ð??± Excellent beginning, and tugs at your curiosity! Good job!
Comment Written 12-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and rating. I like creepy myself. Maybe that is why I write it. Lance can get out of the cracked mirror, because it is cracked. Lance will come out of the mirror slowly or come out and go back in. I haven't decided yet. Thank you for reading.
Comment from tfawcus
This certainly sounds like a powerful story I the making. I didn't read the first part, Redemption, and so there are elements that are a bit unclear to me, though there's enough backstory here to make it fairly easy to overcome that. Good luck with the second book.
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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This certainly sounds like a powerful story I the making. I didn't read the first part, Redemption, and so there are elements that are a bit unclear to me, though there's enough backstory here to make it fairly easy to overcome that. Good luck with the second book.
Comment Written 12-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 13-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and rating. I am glad I gave enough of a back story to make it fairly easy to understand what has happen. If you have any recommendations to give more information to the reader I am all ears. I take recommendations seriously and do use them most of the time. Thank you for reading.
Comment from Lance S. Loria
I was drawn to read this in part because my name is Lance. Seriously, I enjoyed the read and can envision the complete story being equally engaging. Good work.
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2019
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I was drawn to read this in part because my name is Lance. Seriously, I enjoyed the read and can envision the complete story being equally engaging. Good work.
Comment Written 11-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and rating. I am glad you were intrigue, even if it was because your name is Lance. There is more to come. Also, this is the second book. The first one is completed. Thank you for reading.
Comment from pbomar1115
In love with a man, some women do anything for him. But when it comes to a woman being in love with an evil man who has harm on his mind toward the woman, this is scary. Wow.
Phillip
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2019
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In love with a man, some women do anything for him. But when it comes to a woman being in love with an evil man who has harm on his mind toward the woman, this is scary. Wow.
Phillip
Comment Written 10-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and your rating. Lance wasn't an evil man until Susie brought him back from the grave in the book before this one. Thank you for reading.
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There was something beyond the grave that made him see Susie differently.
Phillip
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Yes she helped the Detective Robert Case, who she has been seeing the last two years and moved in with. trap him in the mirror. She brought him back out of love and trapped him out of fear.
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Sounds like an interesting story.
Phillip
Comment from Wabigoon
SLMorrical--
Cracking or breaking the corner, Masonic or 90 degree angle of a corner (mirror) could mean that you have broken a Masonic foundation on the design of things. It sounds, however, from what I see here that this is not releasing positive power. I do not know your story, but wouldn't the repression of resurrection be because it will release evil? Whose evil would be the question?
Best
Wabigoon/Jeff
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2019
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SLMorrical--
Cracking or breaking the corner, Masonic or 90 degree angle of a corner (mirror) could mean that you have broken a Masonic foundation on the design of things. It sounds, however, from what I see here that this is not releasing positive power. I do not know your story, but wouldn't the repression of resurrection be because it will release evil? Whose evil would be the question?
Best
Wabigoon/Jeff
Comment Written 09-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 11-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and rating. The evil being released is Lance who was trapped into the mirror in the last book. I had only planned on writing the one, but as I progressed through it I felt another book come into play. Thank you for reading,
Comment from Kathleen Washnis
Just so I'm clear, so Lance was once Susie's wife? I can see where this can develop into a very interesting thriller story! The picture is gripping and spirits can get into mirrors as a portal. I like your line at the end, the power of evil never dies, it just transforms. I know the chapter in the book is called Redemption but was just wondering as the word was used three times when speaking of Lance that perhaps one of the redemption words could be replaced with 'this time there will be no questions just gaining possession.' (or something like that?) Just a thought! I'm reading this late at night so I'm sure it's fine the way you wrote it. The only word I noticed, the word 'to' I think should be spelled 'too' in the sentence with the salesmen too quickly.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2019
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Just so I'm clear, so Lance was once Susie's wife? I can see where this can develop into a very interesting thriller story! The picture is gripping and spirits can get into mirrors as a portal. I like your line at the end, the power of evil never dies, it just transforms. I know the chapter in the book is called Redemption but was just wondering as the word was used three times when speaking of Lance that perhaps one of the redemption words could be replaced with 'this time there will be no questions just gaining possession.' (or something like that?) Just a thought! I'm reading this late at night so I'm sure it's fine the way you wrote it. The only word I noticed, the word 'to' I think should be spelled 'too' in the sentence with the salesmen too quickly.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and rating. Yes Lance was Susie's husband. I know the word Redemption is in there a few times, but I wanted it stressed in the prologue, because it is the sequel to the book Redemption, which is posted on FanStory, and I am trying to get published. I did fix the too. Thank you for reading.
Comment from Accasej
Because this is the first aspect of the book I'm reading, understandably I'd be left a bit confused. Is it kind of sci-fi/Mystery genré?
You were able to grab my attention though & I'm interested to find out how it pans out. I'll be sure to bookmark you ð???.
Accasej
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reply by the author on 07-Mar-2019
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Because this is the first aspect of the book I'm reading, understandably I'd be left a bit confused. Is it kind of sci-fi/Mystery genré?
You were able to grab my attention though & I'm interested to find out how it pans out. I'll be sure to bookmark you ð???.
Accasej
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 07-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and rating. This is the sequel to the book Redemption. I am sure it will all fall into place soon, and no more confusion. Thank you for reading.
Comment from D.Ream
This is an intriguing and entertaining opening. I enjoyed the way that I was introduced to the character's and the way that I gained awareness of the backstory and what was going to move forward in the second book. There is a real menace in some of these sentences.
Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2019
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This is an intriguing and entertaining opening. I enjoyed the way that I was introduced to the character's and the way that I gained awareness of the backstory and what was going to move forward in the second book. There is a real menace in some of these sentences.
Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 06-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and rating. I am glad you enjoyed the beginning, which is also the ending of the first book in a way. Lance is a real menace. He was a sweet wonderful person in life, but he became evil when Susie brought him back from the grave. Thank you for reading.
Comment from Shirley McLain
I didn't read but one chapter in the first book but I am ready to start on the 2nd with you. I wish you the best with writing it. Have a good night. Shirley
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2019
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I didn't read but one chapter in the first book but I am ready to start on the 2nd with you. I wish you the best with writing it. Have a good night. Shirley
Comment Written 06-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 07-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and rating. I am glad you will be following this book a little more. Thank you for reading.
Comment from Randa Dayle
Great clincher at the end! The truth is, the power of evil never dies, it just transforms. Isn't that true!! Nice story, like the mirror story, and it's to bad she didn't bury the mirror!!
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2019
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Great clincher at the end! The truth is, the power of evil never dies, it just transforms. Isn't that true!! Nice story, like the mirror story, and it's to bad she didn't bury the mirror!!
Comment Written 03-Mar-2019
reply by the author on 04-Mar-2019
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Thank you for your review and rating. Yeah it is bad she didn't bury the mirror, but humans react with emotions, and it was her feelings for Lance that she couldn't bury the mirror.Thank you for reading.
