Comment from Phyllis Stewart

Excellent

Well done. I hope the surgery went well and you continued to sing. The tornado incident must have been terrifying. Thankfully, it veered away and ignored you. I don't know how even a native Nebraskan could lie in a ditch and feel protected. We had a tornado here about thirty years ago. DIdn' do any damage to our house, but it killed eleven nuns when it smashed the roof on the school they were in. Horrible things!

 Comment Written 03-Jun-2019

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reply by the author on 03-Jun-2019

OMG!! That's horrible!!

Comment from Janice Canerdy

Excellent

Your vividly descriptive personal essay/narrative is very well-written.
A close call has a way of kicking us into high gear with a new realization of how much hard work and determination life requires.

 Comment Written 03-Jun-2019

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reply by the author on 03-Jun-2019

And appreciation and gratitude, too! Because it can all be yanked away in a blink!

Thanks for this really nice review, Janice.

Comment from LIJ Red

Excellent

For me it was an icy mountain highway and a frozen ridge of dirt that caught my vehicle at the edge of the precipice. I also stopped busting my rear and looked at life...excellent post.

 Comment Written 03-Jun-2019

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reply by the author on 03-Jun-2019

Thanks, LlJ Red.

Comment from LisaMay

Excellent

So that's where the overachieving came from... a near-annihilation in Nebraska!
A good twister on lemonade/lemons.

Delete one of the the in this this sentence sentence:
Two college friends --who'd generously agreed to take me to the the airport after our etc.

 Comment Written 03-Jun-2019

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reply by the author on 03-Jun-2019

No, I was always an over-achiever. I completed a four-year degree in two-and-a-half years. This just jet-fueled it. Plus it made me change my lousy attitude about having to be way-laid in my career for a time.

Thanks for the terrific review (and for catching the the nit!)

reply by LisaMay on 03-Jun-2019

I got jet-fueled in my own art life when some prissy uppitty young person in a position of power at the arts foundation, when I applied for some funding, told me i'd never amount to anything in the art world because I hadn't been to art school and i was too old. You will know me enough by now to see how I would respond to that condescending comment!! The steam coming out my ears could have powered a small city.

reply by the author on 03-Jun-2019

Yes! Big-time motivation there!! She was probably threatened by your talent and imagining (or, more like, HOPING) you'd curl up and let your die away after such words. Well, wasn't SHE in for the rudest of awakenings. And what is she (not) up to these days? Have you kept track of her?

reply by LisaMay on 03-Jun-2019

Nah, she was up in Auckland and South Islanders don't think much of Aucklanders, we call them JAFFAS (just another effing Aucklander) I hit my mental delete button as soon as she said that.

reply by the author on 03-Jun-2019

Way smarter choice. xo

Comment from djsaxon

Excellent

I really like the premise, and the opening para is terrific. I would be inclined to revisit and maybe move some of the commas. Also this:

"Two college friends (--who'd generously agreed to take me to the the airport after our Commencement--) and I peered out from our (erstwhile) bunker as a funnel-shaped cloud swirled lower and lower, at breakneck speed, toward terra firma."

Delete the stuff in brackets. The college friends qualification is unnecessary and 'erstwhile' means former (?)

"My two college friends and I peered out from our makeshift bunker as a funnel-shaped twister swirled lower and lower at breakneck speed toward terra firma."

Twister is maybe stronger and more threatening than cloud.

The resolution is fine, but I guess that I was hoping for a twist, or a sting in the tail. It matters not. I was engaged throughout, and that is what really matters in any write. Cheers - DJ

 Comment Written 03-Jun-2019

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reply by the author on 03-Jun-2019

Thank you, DJ. Great suggestions, all. I'll get right to them.

Comment from way2gokevs

Excellent

Lemonade the nectar of summer..... You weave a story of diverse, real life drama, enjoyed the read..... good luck in the contest. Thanks for sharing.
Have a lovely day. Cheers, Kev.

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2019

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reply by the author on 03-Jun-2019

Thanks for the review and the well-wishes for the contest, Kev. I appreciate both.

Comment from Y. M. Roger

Excellent

Amazing how those 'surprise hardships' can change our perspective on things! ;) ;) A great offering for this contest! :) Thank you for sharing and best of luck to you at the polls! :)

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2019

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reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019

Thank you very much for this encouraging review!

Comment from Cybertron1986

Excellent

The voice expressed here was engaging and appealing...quite colloquial and entertaining. I like the theme, which I could relate to as a former student who also went to University. I enjoyed this story as it took me to a personal level. Well done

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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2019

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reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019

Thanks very much, Cybertron1986! I appreciate your feedback.

Comment from phil nelson

Excellent

This was a most enjoyable short story, and I hope it does well in the contest! you did well to set up the suspense early and your imagery is excellent. The epiphany is well thought out, and the twist --er is clever!

All the Best!

Phil

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 02-Jun-2019

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reply by the author on 02-Jun-2019

Thanks for catching that play on words, Phil. I appreciate the review.