Our St. Petersburg Vacation
At The Beach Story contest entry17 total reviews
Comment from john mallahan
Nice! Thanks for sharing! You had a real suspense deal goin there! And obviously you have seen "Jaws" as well, maybe alla us have. The dollar tree connection is priceless. Cause, don't we all feel that need to recover--the thing we'd paid the least for!
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
Nice! Thanks for sharing! You had a real suspense deal goin there! And obviously you have seen "Jaws" as well, maybe alla us have. The dollar tree connection is priceless. Cause, don't we all feel that need to recover--the thing we'd paid the least for!
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
-
Ain't that the truth? Lol. Thank you for the excellent review, John. Yeah, I may have seen it a time or two. Ha. I really appreciate the generous stars. friend. I'm glad you liked this silly piece. Have a great weekend.
Ron
Comment from JDRBAR
Quite humorous to say the least. Our stories are similar (shark), but mine's real LOL. Very good job with this. It definitely kept me reading. Good luck with this.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
Quite humorous to say the least. Our stories are similar (shark), but mine's real LOL. Very good job with this. It definitely kept me reading. Good luck with this.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
-
Thank you for the great review and generous stars, JDRB. I'm glad you liked this silly piece.
Comment from Sandra Ludwick
Thank you for sharing your story. It was certainly imaginative. Anyone who would go to such an extent for a dollar necklace is either very brave or . . . However, there were a few items that could be tidied up.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
Thank you for sharing your story. It was certainly imaginative. Anyone who would go to such an extent for a dollar necklace is either very brave or . . . However, there were a few items that could be tidied up.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
-
If you'd be as kind as to elaborate, I'll see what I can do. When someone suggests there should be tidied up changes made, they usually follow with what they are. Thanks for the stars though, Sandra.
Comment from Patty Palmer
This is absolutely hilarious!! I laughed my butt off right from the start! Your words so descriptive, made it like I was there and I could see the whole silly scene from beginning to end!! It was totally enjoyable to read. I seriously hope you win the first prize because this is totally a great story!
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
This is absolutely hilarious!! I laughed my butt off right from the start! Your words so descriptive, made it like I was there and I could see the whole silly scene from beginning to end!! It was totally enjoyable to read. I seriously hope you win the first prize because this is totally a great story!
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
-
Thank you so much for the great review and big sixer, Patty. I tried to make it as far fetched as I could, lol. I'm glad you had a couple chuckles out of this silliness. Thank you again. Have a great day.
Ron
-
You're very welcome! Ya know I wasn't sure how to write a story and be imaginative as yours was perfect. I think I actually learned something from your poem. I couldn't see anyone else winning this but you!
-
Thank you again, Patty. You made my day. I usually write poetry but sometimes I write stories. But when I do, I try to pack them action. Plus I try to come up with something ridiculously over the top. I mostly do it for my own silly enjoyment. Haha. Have a wonderful day, Patty. Thank you again.
Ron
-
you're welcome
Enjoy your day too. My family and I are off to the ice cream social this afternoon!
Patty
-
Can't beat that. Have fun.
Comment from Bill Pinder
You really sold this as a true story! what a great vacay! Sounds like a combination of Jaws and a Bruce Willis movie. Great job with your fantasy life.
Bill
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2019
You really sold this as a true story! what a great vacay! Sounds like a combination of Jaws and a Bruce Willis movie. Great job with your fantasy life.
Bill
Comment Written 11-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2019
-
Lol. Thank you for the great review, Bill. I really appreciate the generous stars. I'm glad you liked this silly thing. Have a good one.
Ron
Comment from Sylvia Page
I must say it is a dare-devil story hard to believe. Imagine trying to wrestle with a shark! Were you off your mind trying to reclaim a dollar store chain and pendant virtually off the jaws of a shark? Well done!
Best wishes
Sylvia
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
I must say it is a dare-devil story hard to believe. Imagine trying to wrestle with a shark! Were you off your mind trying to reclaim a dollar store chain and pendant virtually off the jaws of a shark? Well done!
Best wishes
Sylvia
Comment Written 08-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
-
Thank you for the great review, Sylvia. I'm glad you liked this silly piece.
Ron
Comment from beizanten
A pretty good opening paragraph. You write the reaction to shark quite good, I think people would have panic more. It is pretty funny and amusing. Not what I expected with shark involve
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
A pretty good opening paragraph. You write the reaction to shark quite good, I think people would have panic more. It is pretty funny and amusing. Not what I expected with shark involve
Comment Written 08-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
-
Thank you for the great review, Beizanten. I'm glad you liked this ridiculous piece.
Comment from Janilou
What a vacation!
Notes:
I spotted my girl and her (dip shit) boyfriend way the hell out there(.) "Great."
Add a period.
and dip-shit
Corrected, it would read:
I spotted my girl and her dip-shit boyfriend way the hell out there.
"Great."
Funny story! And the necklace was saved. Phew.
All the best,
Jan
PS Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
What a vacation!
Notes:
I spotted my girl and her (dip shit) boyfriend way the hell out there(.) "Great."
Add a period.
and dip-shit
Corrected, it would read:
I spotted my girl and her dip-shit boyfriend way the hell out there.
"Great."
Funny story! And the necklace was saved. Phew.
All the best,
Jan
PS Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
-
Thank you for the great review and for the help, Jan. I fixed it. I can't believe I didn't have anything after 'there.' I'm glad you caught it. I dearly appreciate the gracious stars and good luck wishes, J. I'm glad you liked this silly piece. have a great day.
Ron
-
Don't feel bad. Yesterday, I read a chapter of my latest novel out loud to someone and found not one but three glaring errors! It had been proof-read at least ten times! LOL
Comment from JudyE
This is a great 'tall tale' and should do well in the 'at the beach' contest. I was laughing out loud by the finish. What a great story.
I picked up one spag:
I pulled it's mouth again and steered it back toward the ship - delete apostrophe in 'its'
Good luck
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
This is a great 'tall tale' and should do well in the 'at the beach' contest. I was laughing out loud by the finish. What a great story.
I picked up one spag:
I pulled it's mouth again and steered it back toward the ship - delete apostrophe in 'its'
Good luck
Comment Written 08-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
-
I dearly appreciate the gracious stars and for finding the goof, Judy. I fixed it. I'm glad you had a chuckle at this silliness. Thank you for the great review and good luck wishes. Have a wonderful day.
Ron
Comment from Val Crisson
Well, I had to stay with this one a while! I find a great deal of imagination, and a great deal "hollywood" in this piece. None the less, the author laid out the story perfectly. It would make a great movie, and I hope the writer got to finish his "Corona" Very Mel Gibson plot. Hope it does well.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
Well, I had to stay with this one a while! I find a great deal of imagination, and a great deal "hollywood" in this piece. None the less, the author laid out the story perfectly. It would make a great movie, and I hope the writer got to finish his "Corona" Very Mel Gibson plot. Hope it does well.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2019
-
Thank you for the great review, Val. Yeah, I was going for over the top. Lol. I appreciate the starts, Val. I'm glad you liked this silliness.