I'll Cling To This Comfort
Dance partners through life.18 total reviews
Comment from Robert Zimmerman
Hi Lisa. I thought the poem was entertaining based on the Pic and the age of the dancers. There are several really good usages of language but my favorite is the very first line. "Dance me a daydream" is really a really cool line to begin the work. Z
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
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Hi Lisa. I thought the poem was entertaining based on the Pic and the age of the dancers. There are several really good usages of language but my favorite is the very first line. "Dance me a daydream" is really a really cool line to begin the work. Z
Comment Written 13-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
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Hi Z, thanks for your positive review. I liked that line too and would have used it as the poem's title but it was a bit similar to a previous poem I have written which I called "Sing Me Your Silence". It was actually that poem that gave me the idea of the line "Dance me a daydream".
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You're Welcome!
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
"I'll Cling To This Comfort", is an extremely well-written and delightfully descriptive piece. This talented poet's work was a pain to both read and review. To me, this is a six, but unfortunately I only have fives left. I look forward to seeing your next post.
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2019
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"I'll Cling To This Comfort", is an extremely well-written and delightfully descriptive piece. This talented poet's work was a pain to both read and review. To me, this is a six, but unfortunately I only have fives left. I look forward to seeing your next post.
Comment Written 13-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2019
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Haha... you have left me confused?... I am hoping there is a typo in your review "This talented poet's work was a pain to both read and review", but you say it is worth a 6?
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LisaMay, I have myself confused. It was a bad hair day!!
The pain bit should have been pleasure.
Yes, it was certainly worth a six.
the Duchess !(-_-)!
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Hahaahaa... put some more grease in it!! Thanks for your great review.
Comment from Gloria ....
Lisa I agree with you about the artwork, but then again a little jitterbug might not be so bad to glide that golden glowing heart.
Excellent entry in a great idea for a contest.
Great luck in the booth.
Gloria
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
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Lisa I agree with you about the artwork, but then again a little jitterbug might not be so bad to glide that golden glowing heart.
Excellent entry in a great idea for a contest.
Great luck in the booth.
Gloria
Comment Written 13-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 13-Jul-2019
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Thanks for this wonderful review. I watched a jitterbug youtube clip and it looked great fun.
Comment from Carla Trinklein
I think the picture is perfect! I love the joy at the beginning of this work, giving away the more reflective feel of dusk, then the peace of nightfall. Exactly what some longtime couples, the lucky few, experience during a shared lifetime together! This is beautiful. Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2019
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I think the picture is perfect! I love the joy at the beginning of this work, giving away the more reflective feel of dusk, then the peace of nightfall. Exactly what some longtime couples, the lucky few, experience during a shared lifetime together! This is beautiful. Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 14-Jul-2019
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Thanks for your review, Carla.
Yes, those lucky ones together... I'm envious!
Comment from poetwatch
LisaMay... this is you... showing everyone that you can dance to the beat of the music. This is a poem destine for greatness. In this you show your devil-may-care attitude, but with style. :) Keep up the great work and publish your book of poems. That's how much I believe in your writing. This is a excellent entry for the Dancing contest.
P.S. Smile woman. :)
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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LisaMay... this is you... showing everyone that you can dance to the beat of the music. This is a poem destine for greatness. In this you show your devil-may-care attitude, but with style. :) Keep up the great work and publish your book of poems. That's how much I believe in your writing. This is a excellent entry for the Dancing contest.
P.S. Smile woman. :)
Comment Written 12-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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Here is another instance of 'same wavelength'. I have just finished writing a short story that I will be posting in the next few days and it has a woman riding a motorbike along Devil-may-care Street!!!... the exact same phrase you have used here.
This is a good omen about how I should publish a book. Thanks for the reinforcement. I am smiling.
Comment from BeasPeas
Hi Lisa. I think the image of the old folks dancing is in perfect keeping with your fun poem. It describes them to a T out there having fun whirling and twirling.
Favorite lines:
"Just hold me and tell me
we soared like the angels,
then we can creak Home to our rest."
Marilyn
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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Hi Lisa. I think the image of the old folks dancing is in perfect keeping with your fun poem. It describes them to a T out there having fun whirling and twirling.
Favorite lines:
"Just hold me and tell me
we soared like the angels,
then we can creak Home to our rest."
Marilyn
Comment Written 11-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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Thanks for reviewing and for your comments... I really liked how i tied it up at the end also... initially I had 'creep Home' but it got changed to bring a lighter touch.
Comment from LyndaS
We'll dawdle through dusk in a whirl of our own... Very visual and descriptive. This is so adorable and well written. Two loving seniors tripping the light fantastic. Loved it. This should do well in the booth. Loved your comments. LOL Kiss Kiss Lynda
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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We'll dawdle through dusk in a whirl of our own... Very visual and descriptive. This is so adorable and well written. Two loving seniors tripping the light fantastic. Loved it. This should do well in the booth. Loved your comments. LOL Kiss Kiss Lynda
Comment Written 11-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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I think their tango days are over... they'd need someone to help them disentango their arms and legs if they tried it!
Thanks for your comments.
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Anytime Sis 'o mine!
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
This meets the contest requirements well with a clear theme of dancing running throughout. The imagery is executed nicely as are the various poetic devices used in this Free Verse. Good luck in the voting and thank you very much for sharing it.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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This meets the contest requirements well with a clear theme of dancing running throughout. The imagery is executed nicely as are the various poetic devices used in this Free Verse. Good luck in the voting and thank you very much for sharing it.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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Thanks for these validating comments!
Comment from juliaSjames
Your wordplay shines in this moving (sic) rhythmic free verse. Love the alliteration that underscores your imaginative metaphors.
A dance for all ages and stages of a relationship and then together forever.
Excellent start. Great follow through. But for me the closing stanza is the winner, tender, loving and with that trademark glint of humour in the penultimate line.
Best of luck in the contest.
Blessings Julia
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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Your wordplay shines in this moving (sic) rhythmic free verse. Love the alliteration that underscores your imaginative metaphors.
A dance for all ages and stages of a relationship and then together forever.
Excellent start. Great follow through. But for me the closing stanza is the winner, tender, loving and with that trademark glint of humour in the penultimate line.
Best of luck in the contest.
Blessings Julia
Comment Written 11-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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I love your reviews, Julia... they provide great feedback on what works for you... and of course I love the praise bits!!
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Ha! Look at us egocentric poets! I don't let my husband anywhere near my creative work! He puts on his glasses, settles himself comfortably in his chair and we're off to the races!!!
LOLOL
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Husbands can be problematic sometimes. I like to be egocentric in private. Then I can really believe my own press.
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:-))
Comment from Gail Denham
Hooray - they can still dance. That's fantastic. I like the image you chose. And enjoyed the liveliness of the poem with words cavorting wherever they chose. This is being free in writing.
good job.
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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Hooray - they can still dance. That's fantastic. I like the image you chose. And enjoyed the liveliness of the poem with words cavorting wherever they chose. This is being free in writing.
good job.
Comment Written 11-Jul-2019
reply by the author on 12-Jul-2019
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Thanks for your comments... I'm pleased you thought the language was cavorting (that's one of my favourite words; I don't use it much though because it is so distinctive.)
