rOCk CanDy queen
A look into an addict's mental state during active addiction48 total reviews
Comment from kiwisteveh
All addictions are evil and all frustratingly difficult to defeat. Your free verse poem expresses both the horrors and the potential recovery with great intensity.
The depiction of the drug as feminine was interesting, but I have to say I soon tired of the quotation marks on 'she'. I would suggest using them for the first occurrence only or possibly not using them at all. I also think you maybe went on a little too long. I suspect some readers will have drifted off before reaching the end of your poem.
Nevertheless, a powerful piece.
Steve
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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All addictions are evil and all frustratingly difficult to defeat. Your free verse poem expresses both the horrors and the potential recovery with great intensity.
The depiction of the drug as feminine was interesting, but I have to say I soon tired of the quotation marks on 'she'. I would suggest using them for the first occurrence only or possibly not using them at all. I also think you maybe went on a little too long. I suspect some readers will have drifted off before reaching the end of your poem.
Nevertheless, a powerful piece.
Steve
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Respectfully,
this isn't free verse because it does have a rhyme throughout the poem. Free verse is an open form of poetry, which in its modern form arose through the French vers libre form. It does not use consistent meter patterns, rhyme, or any musical pattern. It thus tends to follow the rhythm of natural speech.
⭐ en.m.wikipedia.org
I had a warning that it was lengthly so that people who weren't into long poetry didn't have to read it. I may make it into two parts but I won't shorten it because it would be like removing parts of my journey. More often than not I've received five and six STARS so the majority loved it!
That your for your review and texting of my poem.
Many blessings to you and your family;-)
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hello brave one you deserve
Six virtual stars for me to take look into an addict's mental state during their active addiction. Which I did and understand what you went though when you are trying to get rid of the
rOCk CanDy queen.
Gert
I found that your poem was too long.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Hello brave one you deserve
Six virtual stars for me to take look into an addict's mental state during their active addiction. Which I did and understand what you went though when you are trying to get rid of the
rOCk CanDy queen.
Gert
I found that your poem was too long.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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I understand but there's nothing I can do about the length bc it would be like removing part of my life of I were to shorten it. I have a "warning lengthly read" on my poem so that folks that don't care for long poems don't have to read it.
I appreciate your virtual six STARS and your review and five star rating;-)
God bless you;-)
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You are welcome
Melodie Michelle
Gert
Comment from samandlancelot
Melodie,
This is the most amazing poem I have read on addiction. One of my nieces and one of nephews overcame addiction after some jail time.
You have an amazing talent. I can think of three poetry magazines that might want to publish your poem: Rattle, Poetry and Palette.
Your mother was wrong.
I'll have to give you a virtual six-star rating. I used my last one earlier today.
It was a moving experience to read your poem. Your rhymes were all in just the right places. I'm so glad for your success in overcoming your addiction and your desire to help others.
that your (you're) not
going to back down
Patricia
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Melodie,
This is the most amazing poem I have read on addiction. One of my nieces and one of nephews overcame addiction after some jail time.
You have an amazing talent. I can think of three poetry magazines that might want to publish your poem: Rattle, Poetry and Palette.
Your mother was wrong.
I'll have to give you a virtual six-star rating. I used my last one earlier today.
It was a moving experience to read your poem. Your rhymes were all in just the right places. I'm so glad for your success in overcoming your addiction and your desire to help others.
that your (you're) not
going to back down
Patricia
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Wow thank you for your virtual six STARS and I do appreciate the amazing complimentary review and rating;-)
Thank you also for seeing my soul through my poem and getting the rhymes in all right places, etc ...
God bless you and your family;-)
Comment from RGstar
Its very brave of one to write this.
It is an excellent piece of writing, in its narration, and with the fact the subject matter is so taboo and closed, it is even more of a wonder that you were able to personalize the antagonist the way you have.
You might hear this often that the one criticism is that you didn't cut this into three parts. It would have been magnificent had you done art 1, 2 and 3.
Readers would have been riveted, so well you wrote.
You would have no problem writing a novel if you could lay it out correctly. It is a very good piece of writing, but alas, as many will, I had trouble getting to the end, as I wanted that intensity to carry all the way through, which it did, but if something is too sweet for too long, regardless of how delicious, you will become sick, and if too bitter for too long, you will lose sight of the taste.
I would have given this a six star if I had, not for the length, but for the creative writing, and the personification of a thing that many find hard to speak about.
A very well done.
My best wishes.
RGstar.
Have a great week.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Its very brave of one to write this.
It is an excellent piece of writing, in its narration, and with the fact the subject matter is so taboo and closed, it is even more of a wonder that you were able to personalize the antagonist the way you have.
You might hear this often that the one criticism is that you didn't cut this into three parts. It would have been magnificent had you done art 1, 2 and 3.
Readers would have been riveted, so well you wrote.
You would have no problem writing a novel if you could lay it out correctly. It is a very good piece of writing, but alas, as many will, I had trouble getting to the end, as I wanted that intensity to carry all the way through, which it did, but if something is too sweet for too long, regardless of how delicious, you will become sick, and if too bitter for too long, you will lose sight of the taste.
I would have given this a six star if I had, not for the length, but for the creative writing, and the personification of a thing that many find hard to speak about.
A very well done.
My best wishes.
RGstar.
Have a great week.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Thank you for your kind words, you made my day! Now I may make the poem into three parts but I'm not willing to shorten it bc if I did it would be like removing parts of my life and my journey, and I'm not willing to do that!
Many blessings to you and your family;-)
Comment from Mands
Wow, I found this to be so emotive and powerful. But beautifully written. Ever verse told the struggle of addiction, the pull of the drug and hold it can take. This has certainly opened my eyes as to how strong a hold addiction can have. I always thought people took drugs by choice and they could stop taking them by choice. But, this shows in very stark and real terms what a battle it is, every day. So I feel that every step taken to break away from this addiction, must be awarded and cheered. This should be read in every school to show kids, its not cool to 'experiment' with drugs and how quickly addiction can take hold. Thank you so much for sharing this. And keep writing. You have a talent that needs to be shared. xx :)
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Wow, I found this to be so emotive and powerful. But beautifully written. Ever verse told the struggle of addiction, the pull of the drug and hold it can take. This has certainly opened my eyes as to how strong a hold addiction can have. I always thought people took drugs by choice and they could stop taking them by choice. But, this shows in very stark and real terms what a battle it is, every day. So I feel that every step taken to break away from this addiction, must be awarded and cheered. This should be read in every school to show kids, its not cool to 'experiment' with drugs and how quickly addiction can take hold. Thank you so much for sharing this. And keep writing. You have a talent that needs to be shared. xx :)
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Thank you for my EXCEPTIONAL review and SIX STAR RATING!
WOW! Such kind words and I'm glad my poem showed you that although in the beginning using the drugs is by choice but we quickly lose the ability to make that choice anymore once ADDICTION takes hold and has us by the balls! Then it's no longer by choice it's a must too get the drug any way possible pretty much. It's all about mind power after that and I weaned myself from crack cocaine, that's how I finally stayed quit after five harrowing relapses.
Thank you for your amazing compliments about my writing, you made my whole day;-)
God bless you and your family;-)
Comment from Ritasher
Hello, Melodie!
Wow! I guess it's not only about the cocaine, it's about fighting one's own demons, one's own fears and feelings... It's a never ending battle that you have to fight. There are so many addictions possible that we face in our lifetimes. Thank you for being brave and sharing such creation, it really made me rethink on how I get on with my life!
Sincerely, Rita
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Hello, Melodie!
Wow! I guess it's not only about the cocaine, it's about fighting one's own demons, one's own fears and feelings... It's a never ending battle that you have to fight. There are so many addictions possible that we face in our lifetimes. Thank you for being brave and sharing such creation, it really made me rethink on how I get on with my life!
Sincerely, Rita
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Thank you for your insightful review and rating!
God bless you;-)
Comment from jake cosmos aller
wow just so powerful and real you got in the mind of the crack head and the power that cocaine can have over people. I suppose the meth is similar probably worth but I would not know. tried cocaine once powder form did not see the appeal and speed once that was more than enough for me and that was decades ago. very powerful poem. Hope you stay clean and defeat the evil queen. that would be a nice line too in a poem....
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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wow just so powerful and real you got in the mind of the crack head and the power that cocaine can have over people. I suppose the meth is similar probably worth but I would not know. tried cocaine once powder form did not see the appeal and speed once that was more than enough for me and that was decades ago. very powerful poem. Hope you stay clean and defeat the evil queen. that would be a nice line too in a poem....
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Oh I will stay clean from crack cocaine and I've survived addiction and the evil queen;-) Also not a crack head but a Rock Star and ALL hard drugs and alcohol, gambling, food, sex and etc ... are addictive just like the crack cocaine is;-( I just want to help people who are hard core addicts because they can get well, they just don't realize that in the beginning! They are worth it.
I appreciate your review and rating. Many blessings to you and your family;-)
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
A tour de force of torment powerfully rendered in free verse--the jagged format works well to convey the frantic struggle to and fro--stunning imagery--I can't relate to drug addiction--regardless, this has the ring of truth.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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A tour de force of torment powerfully rendered in free verse--the jagged format works well to convey the frantic struggle to and fro--stunning imagery--I can't relate to drug addiction--regardless, this has the ring of truth.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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Respectfully,
this isn't free verse because it does have a rhyme throughout the poem. Free verse is an open form of poetry, which in its modern form arose through the French vers libre form. It does not use consistent meter patterns, rhyme, or any musical pattern. It thus tends to follow the rhythm of natural speech.
⭐ en.m.wikipedia.org
If you haven't faced addiction in any form where you were the user or someone close was a user and unless you have been up close and personal like that ... There's no way you could understand and that's not your fault and be thankful you haven't had to fight that huge demon for real!
I appreciate your review and the time you took out of your schedule to review and rate me!
God bless you and your family;-)
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Thanks for the education! As you can tell, I'm not well "versed" in poetry!
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;-)
Comment from oliver818
This is a very well written poem with rhythm and flow and powerful imagery. It takes us deep into another dark and unpleasant world, the one of addiction. Thanks for sharing this and have a great day
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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This is a very well written poem with rhythm and flow and powerful imagery. It takes us deep into another dark and unpleasant world, the one of addiction. Thanks for sharing this and have a great day
Comment Written 27-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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I appreciate the excellent review and rating!
I just wrote it from my very soul;-)
God bless you;-)
Comment from evesayshi
In my opinion, a stunningly grasping and fierce soliloquy in a desperate emotional cry from the page, of both a personal account and stark warning - presented dramatically and dynamically, singular in experience and harsh reality, rendered in emotionally charged free verse...
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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In my opinion, a stunningly grasping and fierce soliloquy in a desperate emotional cry from the page, of both a personal account and stark warning - presented dramatically and dynamically, singular in experience and harsh reality, rendered in emotionally charged free verse...
Comment Written 26-Mar-2021
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2021
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This isn't free verse because it does have a rhyme throughout the poem. Free verse is an open form of poetry, which in its modern form arose through the French vers libre form. It does not use consistent meter patterns, rhyme, or any musical pattern. It thus tends to follow the rhythm of natural speech.
⭐ en.m.wikipedia.org
If you haven't faced addiction in any form were you are user or someone close is a user and unless you have been up close and personal ... There's no way you could understand and that's not your fault and be thankful you haven't had to fight that huge demon for real!
I appreciate your review and the time you took out of your schedule to review and rate me!
God bless you and your family;-)
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My opinion as a reviewer is the one that counts here - the rhyme was masked by the emotional delivery of the write, for me at least - that was my perception with your morosely extended write, which I read to its "whew" end. My daughter, who was raised by her father, unfortunately, kidnapped by him and whisked out of state, became an addict and died in 2008. I tried to establish a relationship with her as an adult, but she kept reverting to her addictions. I could have and should have called the police when she attempted to attack me, but I didn't, and that proved to be a failure on my part, because I lost her completely with her death. Your "review" of my review was more than inappropriate, since you know nothing of the circumstances of the any reviewer, and your insensitive and gross conclusive comments were and are more than reprehensible, they are "ignorant.' Be comforted in the knowledge I will not lend my critique to anything else you write. May God continue to bless you...Eve
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Your reprehensible review of my poem was uncalled for as you know nothing about how it feels to be in ADDICTION so therefore your ignorance shows here as well!
You didn't have to read my lengthly poem bc there was a warning on it being lengthly. So that's on you, not me!
Maybe if you understood ADDICTION more, you would've been able to make absences with your daughter but I'm very sorry you lost her bc I play daily for all addicts out there in active auction.
I'm good with you not critiquing my work, have a blessed day!
Arctic there board reviews have been amazing so your bad review of my work doesn't even matter.
Good day and my prayers will be continuing for you.
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*amends with your daughter
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*I pray daily for all addicts out there in active addiction
*And there were other reviews that have been amazing
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How dare you reference my daughter as you did? Apparently, my opinion of you was not harsh enough...Eve
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There is something very wrong with you - obviously, your addiction has fractured your mind.
Allow me to repeat my review for your work, which I 'awarded' Six Stars.
" In my opinion, a stunningly grasping and fierce soliloquy in a desperate emotional cry from the page, of both a personal account and stark warning - presented dramatically and dynamically, singular in experience and harsh reality, rendered in emotionally charged free verse... 27-Mar-2021
My lengthy reply was in response to
your answer to my review. No more pills for you today...Eve
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I hope you're seeing a psychiatrist, because in my opinion, you need one, badly. No further comment here...Eve
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Again, as an addict, even a recovering one, you typify entitlement and express it wildly and without reservation. You do not afford the right to comment to someone who disagrees with you or your view of yourself or your actions. I will not respond to further comments from you - it would be a waste of my very precious time. Goodbye, and I wish you the best in God's Grace...Eve
