Almanac of Precious Ones
Giving thanks to those who blessed my life2 total reviews
Comment from Natalie Goodwin
I love that you have an Almanac of Precious Ones. I enjoyed the vivid descriptions, "sweetly scented with lilac powders," "crystal clear waters of Wolf Creek," "honking Canadian geese flying south." This is a beautiful poem. Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2020
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I love that you have an Almanac of Precious Ones. I enjoyed the vivid descriptions, "sweetly scented with lilac powders," "crystal clear waters of Wolf Creek," "honking Canadian geese flying south." This is a beautiful poem. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2020
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Oh, Natalie, I am so much helped as a writer when you name the lines that had a special appeal for you. Thank you very much.
Comment from moongirlwriter
OMGsh. . .this is so beautifully written. It does seem we have been on similar paths. . .I am also so thankful for all such things. . .except the fish, I'm just a little skeerdy cat when it comes to the water. . .I like it, just don't love it except at the oceans edge. A question for you. . .while reading. . .the 3rd line from the bottom, it feels as though "and on all my tomorrows". When I read, it does feel like the word "on" is not needed. :)
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2020
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OMGsh. . .this is so beautifully written. It does seem we have been on similar paths. . .I am also so thankful for all such things. . .except the fish, I'm just a little skeerdy cat when it comes to the water. . .I like it, just don't love it except at the oceans edge. A question for you. . .while reading. . .the 3rd line from the bottom, it feels as though "and on all my tomorrows". When I read, it does feel like the word "on" is not needed. :)
Comment Written 21-Feb-2020
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2020
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Thank you, MoonGirl!
If I could but take you on a short canoe trip, you'd leave aside your fear and discover, in its place, the joyous movements of those river bass.
Help me with this: I mightily give thanks, both today
and on all my tomorrows.
This breaks down as "I give thanks today" and "I give thanks tomorrow" and "I give thanks all my tomorrows." It doesn't work for me. The "on" seems essential. What do you say?
Graciously yours,
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how about "for" all my tomorrows? This is YOUR poem. . .so if "on" works best for you. . .truly, you should leave it there. :)
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I would love going on that canoe trip with you. . .I think I might be too nervous though. I've been on a canoe trip on a lazy day floating down the Sacramento River but I was the lead person with kind of a ditzy friend. . .that was not good. We ended up in the trees. I also did a raft trip down the American river. . . .yikes. Talk about nervous. . .that was more than a little over the top for me. I'm sure a few "quiet" experiences would help me relax , just hasn't happened for me. Really loved hearing your experience in your writing. :)
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I like your spirited response: "I would love going on that canoe trip with you. . ." We're going to get on well together.
I am delighted to hear you call for honesty. How about something like this?
#1 Well, to begin with, I?d want to have us promise to seek honest transparency combined with lots of loving acceptance. Better to say ?I?m not ready to reveal that about myself? than to invent something that is not true. What do you say to this?
#2 I need to learn much about you. How can I learn to cherish you AS YOU ARE, if I don?t know who you truly are? So, right from the beginning, I want to communicate with you as I would to a cherished and trusted friend. Would you be willing to do the same for me? This will break through the awkward hesitancy of our initial messages. You will not be trying to impress me, and I will not be trying to impress you. OK?
Warmly,
Aaron
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I think this might work Aaron, it truly does have a non-threatening feel for me but if I get to a place of , I might have to use that response. . .I'm feeling uneasy or threatened here. I don't ever resort to untruths. . .it's just not who I am. You should also know, the reviews I make of other peoples work have never been to impress . . .it's just the way some writing moves me.
Besides, after reading your bio. . .I'm already feeling a bit intimidated. You have done SO MUCH with your writing, it is impressive. It also makes me want more for my own writing.
One last question, you spoke of "project". Please reveal what it is you are hoping to accomplish. . .at the end of this "project"? Did you already explain your intent and I missed it? Should I go back and read the initial invitation again?
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Dear MoonGirl,
I am a fallible human being like yourself. I'm trying to enter sensitively into your experience. The language sets we inhabit due to our upbringing and education are decidedly different. So the words misfire, they sputter, they offend. Words are such frail vessels for our endeavors to communicate.
Your call for honesty was appreciated. Truth-telling. And I added that "should I try to impress you," that is not honest. And I certainly was not blaming you for doing so with your 6-star review. Far from it. The caution was directed at myself, first and foremost.
You say, "I'm already feeling a bit intimidated. You have done SO MUCH with your writing." Please don't let anything that I may or may not have done in the past make any difference between us. I am just another human being with fears, joys, successes, failures, etc.
So what are we doing here? Why have I come to you? For this: Your life is presently a mystery to me, but I know that you have stories to tell me that will slowly reveal the inner beauty of YOU.
Is this worth your time and attention? I don't know. But I would like to find out. . . .
Please tell me whether this "project" [call it whatever you want] attracts you.
Warmly,
Aaron
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PS: I have started to gather stories to tell you that will reveal the heartache surrounding my mother. It's not a pretty picture. I stepped back and said, "This is a terrible place to begin. I need to sweeten this story a bit."
But, after receiving your call for honesty, I'm saying, "Let it be what it will be. If MoonGirl is shocked or scared away by this, let it be. Don't try to make your heartache pretty for her, Aaron."
Warmly,
Aaron
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good. This is how it should be.
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Hi, So when I'm feeling that I no longer want to be a part of this kind of energy. I will let you know and will wish you well. :)
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Dear MoonGirl,
That's a perfect resolution made with a perfect freedom. I will go ahead with my first Precious One and, when you're ready, I'll receive yours.
Writing in peace and joy,
Aaron
