Lab Partners
A supernatural love story7 total reviews
Comment from Shirley McLain
You created a hero working on the virus. It's a good story and I did enjoy reading it. I didn't find any mistakes. Good luck in the contest. Take care. Shirley
reply by the author on 06-May-2020
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You created a hero working on the virus. It's a good story and I did enjoy reading it. I didn't find any mistakes. Good luck in the contest. Take care. Shirley
Comment Written 05-May-2020
reply by the author on 06-May-2020
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Thank you, Shirley, for sharing my story. I am delighted you enjoyed it.
Comment from Jeffrey L. Michaux
This is really good. It's very sad, but It has a very good and well thought out storyline. It sounds like love was blossoming in the midst of tragedy. It sounds like they will indeed be back together soon. Thanks for sharing this inspirational, engaging, and well written work. Well done!
reply by the author on 06-May-2020
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This is really good. It's very sad, but It has a very good and well thought out storyline. It sounds like love was blossoming in the midst of tragedy. It sounds like they will indeed be back together soon. Thanks for sharing this inspirational, engaging, and well written work. Well done!
Comment Written 05-May-2020
reply by the author on 06-May-2020
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I am so pleased you like my story, Jeffrey. Thank you for your very kind praise.
Comment from Susan Larson
Delightful bitter-sweet love story you have here. and what irony that the formula will work but you won't see the outcome. Very nicely written. Engaging, suspenseful, entertaining. May Diana guide the judges in the contest.
reply by the author on 06-May-2020
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Delightful bitter-sweet love story you have here. and what irony that the formula will work but you won't see the outcome. Very nicely written. Engaging, suspenseful, entertaining. May Diana guide the judges in the contest.
Comment Written 05-May-2020
reply by the author on 06-May-2020
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Thank you, Susan, for your very kind praise of my story.
Comment from robyn corum
Dear Mystery Writer,
A short little tale that gets straight to the point with no curves or questions. Direct and simple. *smile*
It's easy to understand and definitely meets the qualifications for the contest, imo.
I do have a couple notes for you to check on, though -
1.) the technical experience really needed for a break-through.
--> delete 'really'
--> if you absolutely want to add something, perhaps say:
--> the technical experience required for a break-through.
2.) No one tapped on the windows to (wake) me.
3.) I have been working while you (slept).
4.) But I won't see the outcome. -I'm infected.
--> this makes no sense to me - why couldn't he use it on himself? Isn't that the whole point of the formula?
Thanks and good luck!
reply by the author on 03-May-2020
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Dear Mystery Writer,
A short little tale that gets straight to the point with no curves or questions. Direct and simple. *smile*
It's easy to understand and definitely meets the qualifications for the contest, imo.
I do have a couple notes for you to check on, though -
1.) the technical experience really needed for a break-through.
--> delete 'really'
--> if you absolutely want to add something, perhaps say:
--> the technical experience required for a break-through.
2.) No one tapped on the windows to (wake) me.
3.) I have been working while you (slept).
4.) But I won't see the outcome. -I'm infected.
--> this makes no sense to me - why couldn't he use it on himself? Isn't that the whole point of the formula?
Thanks and good luck!
Comment Written 03-May-2020
reply by the author on 03-May-2020
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Thank you, Robyn, for sharing my story and using a close eye. Your suggestions are right-on. As for your final question. the vaccine will work, but likely won?t be ready before he dies?even if he?s the first guinea pig to use it.
Comment from January L'Angelle
This is a love story that has supernatural power. I like the descriptive way you write. "A cloud of green fumes arose swiftly, shrouding her." I can see everything that you write about. I enjoyed this story and it's romantic elements. Well penned. -January L.
reply by the author on 03-May-2020
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This is a love story that has supernatural power. I like the descriptive way you write. "A cloud of green fumes arose swiftly, shrouding her." I can see everything that you write about. I enjoyed this story and it's romantic elements. Well penned. -January L.
Comment Written 03-May-2020
reply by the author on 03-May-2020
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I am very pleased to know you enjoyed my story and think it?s well penned, January. Thank you for the kind praise.
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
This is a very inspirational supernatural story, a vaccine is on tests that can save mankind from coronavirus; Diana is infected; mystic ends; well said, well done; enjoyed the read; thanks for sharing this; keep posting. Good luck. ALCREATOR
reply by the author on 03-May-2020
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This is a very inspirational supernatural story, a vaccine is on tests that can save mankind from coronavirus; Diana is infected; mystic ends; well said, well done; enjoyed the read; thanks for sharing this; keep posting. Good luck. ALCREATOR
Comment Written 03-May-2020
reply by the author on 03-May-2020
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I am delighted you found my story inspirational. Many thanks for your kind praise.
Comment from BlueTiger
Great story, I love your voice and the flow of events here. The first few sentences are a great hook and really pull your reader into the story and the character of the scientist.
The only tweak I saw was in this line:
I'm infected. I and everyone outside these windows knew I would. (maybe change to 'would be')
Other than that, great work, and good luck on the contest!
-BT
reply by the author on 03-May-2020
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Great story, I love your voice and the flow of events here. The first few sentences are a great hook and really pull your reader into the story and the character of the scientist.
The only tweak I saw was in this line:
I'm infected. I and everyone outside these windows knew I would. (maybe change to 'would be')
Other than that, great work, and good luck on the contest!
-BT
Comment Written 03-May-2020
reply by the author on 03-May-2020
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Thank you so much, Blue Tiger, for your high praise of my story. I will add that ?be.?
