A Shiver of Sharks
A 5-7-5 for the contest80 total reviews
Comment from rspoet
Hello Tony.
Even without a crisis the sharks will gather when easy prey is available.
They are, after all, the true Merchants of Death.
Shiver is a great description, they certainly give me the shivers.
I like the new art work. It's easier to see the double meaning.
Shylock is more sly than shy.
Well done
Good luck in the contest.
Robert
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Hello Tony.
Even without a crisis the sharks will gather when easy prey is available.
They are, after all, the true Merchants of Death.
Shiver is a great description, they certainly give me the shivers.
I like the new art work. It's easier to see the double meaning.
Shylock is more sly than shy.
Well done
Good luck in the contest.
Robert
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thank you, Robert, for your review and support. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Boogienights
Liked this very much, especially with the twist at the end...literally a pound of flesh..lol. I also really like the image included..it fits so well. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Liked this very much, especially with the twist at the end...literally a pound of flesh..lol. I also really like the image included..it fits so well. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thank you, Boogienights, for your review and good luck wishes. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Megan3333
I really like the picture you used it's really funny. This poem fits the format really well too. This poem is just a little boring and that's why i gave it 4 stars.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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I really like the picture you used it's really funny. This poem fits the format really well too. This poem is just a little boring and that's why i gave it 4 stars.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thank you, Megan, for your review and honesty. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Joan E.
I always appreciate names for a collection of specific animals, and "shiver of sharks" has added alliteration! I also enjoyed your play on "pound of flesh" in the final line. Thanks for adding the matching picture and best wishes in the 5-7-5 contest- Joan
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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I always appreciate names for a collection of specific animals, and "shiver of sharks" has added alliteration! I also enjoyed your play on "pound of flesh" in the final line. Thanks for adding the matching picture and best wishes in the 5-7-5 contest- Joan
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thank you, Joan, for your review and good luck wishes. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from mermaids
Your words impact the reader. I see the analogy to today's world. "Diving into misfortune" is a strong line that connects the first and last line. Excellent use of words and 5-7-5 form.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Your words impact the reader. I see the analogy to today's world. "Diving into misfortune" is a strong line that connects the first and last line. Excellent use of words and 5-7-5 form.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thank you, Mermaids, for your review and comments about the analogy and form. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Janet Foor
Great 5//7/5 poem Tony. I loved the alliteration with A Shiver of Sharks - it draws the reader in. Excellent metaphor, excellent satori.
Well done.
Blessings
Janet
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Great 5//7/5 poem Tony. I loved the alliteration with A Shiver of Sharks - it draws the reader in. Excellent metaphor, excellent satori.
Well done.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thank you, Janet, for your supportive review and comments. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from Y. M. Roger
Oh, you crafty little devil you... a contemporary commentary veiled in ocean blue - very well done, sir!! ;) Thanx for sharing and best of luck in the contest! ;) Yvette
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Oh, you crafty little devil you... a contemporary commentary veiled in ocean blue - very well done, sir!! ;) Thanx for sharing and best of luck in the contest! ;) Yvette
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thank you, Yvette, for your review and good luck wishes. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from nomi338
Those of us who reside in the pool of human flesh are just as susceptible to being devoured as the fish in the actual sea. How can we survive? Are we just as vulnerable as the poor fish? We have something the fish do not have. More than just the will to survive, we have wisdom, judgement and the ability to think and to devise a possible way out. Lucky us, and yet many perish from making foolish decisions every day.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Those of us who reside in the pool of human flesh are just as susceptible to being devoured as the fish in the actual sea. How can we survive? Are we just as vulnerable as the poor fish? We have something the fish do not have. More than just the will to survive, we have wisdom, judgement and the ability to think and to devise a possible way out. Lucky us, and yet many perish from making foolish decisions every day.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thank you for your review, Nomi. As you suggest, wisdom, judgement and the ability to think are powerful tools when it comes to survival. All good wishes, Tony
Comment from ElPoetry001
Excellent metaphor. It is not color or creed that divides people, it is greed.
Everyone wants a piece of the pie, some people just want more than others.
The ransom sought by greedy people is not for forgiveness, for equality, or for brotherhood, it is for the power of the dollar.
Every person is a shark on some level.
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Excellent metaphor. It is not color or creed that divides people, it is greed.
Everyone wants a piece of the pie, some people just want more than others.
The ransom sought by greedy people is not for forgiveness, for equality, or for brotherhood, it is for the power of the dollar.
Every person is a shark on some level.
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Thank you for your review, ElPoetry. Not for nothing is greed listed as one of the seven deadly sins. After all, who does not lust after that precious sixth star? LOL
All good wishes, Tony
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Thank you
Comment from RGstar
Yes, Tony, this could apply to so many things, even from the current climate of things. You got relayed a valid point in such short amount of words...Good to read from you my friend...long time.
My best wishes.
RG
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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Yes, Tony, this could apply to so many things, even from the current climate of things. You got relayed a valid point in such short amount of words...Good to read from you my friend...long time.
My best wishes.
RG
Comment Written 15-Jun-2020
reply by the author on 17-Jun-2020
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So good to hear from you again, Roy. I think the last poem of yours I reviewed was over a year ago - that marvellous poem about your mother. I hope all is well with you. It's been a difficult time in England recently. We've been relatively unscathed so far, but nothing is guaranteed. All good wishes, Tony
