Comment from Jannypan (Jan)

Excellent

I enjoyed your free verse contest entry, Mystery Writer. Your lines flow smoothly with great imagery. I could see all that you wrote. I like the touches of internal rhyme and the use of alliteration. Your picture and color scheme complete the picture.
Thanks for sharing. Best wishes.
Respectfully, Jan

 Comment Written 20-Aug-2020

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reply by the author on 20-Aug-2020

Thanks for your generous review.

Comment from Mia Twysted

Excellent

This piece makes me feel like we are being played by those in power. It leaves me feeling a bit helpless to do anything about it.

I wish you good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 19-Aug-2020

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reply by the author on 20-Aug-2020

I was feeling like that when i wrote it. It's all a bit depressing really. Thanks for your review.

Comment from Liz O'Neill

Excellent

This becomes a powerful cautionary tale. It has a lot of motion imagery in it. There was a contest about rhythmn and this would top them all. The metaphors will draw the readers in. Your question at the beginning could be at the end too. It is the crux of your entire poem: "what will remain?" Well expressed.

 Comment Written 19-Aug-2020

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reply by the author on 20-Aug-2020

Thanks for your excellent review!

Comment from RShipp

Excellent

What a sad- howbeit, seeming true- of the life in today's world.

I hope I have the courage to throw a rock at the top that represents my spinning life and allow it to become still so that I can become the person I was meant to be.

Enjoyed.

 Comment Written 19-Aug-2020

Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.

Excellent

Your poem is a unique reminder of effect the chaos around us causes. I hope it does well as an entry for the Free Verse Poem writing prompt. I wish you the best of luck in the contest!

 Comment Written 19-Aug-2020

Comment from Dolly'sPoems

Excellent

This is a sad and melancholy write with a touch of despair as life as we know it has changed and been interrupted by rioting or the virus, we seem controlled by the media these days, much enjoyed, love Dolly x

 Comment Written 19-Aug-2020

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

Great commentary on what's happening in our country. I agree that the web of lies that is causing so much division among people. The "sly spiders" are working overtime during this election year.
Best wishes in the contest!

 Comment Written 19-Aug-2020

Comment from mauial

Excellent

Wow this is a beautifully written free verse about the times we are living in. I really loved this line, Our yo-yo strings are yanked by jerks. It reminds me about a scripture regarding rule by man: All of this I have seen, and I applied my heart to every work that has been done under the sun, during the time that man has dominated man to his harm (Ecclesiastes 8:9)

 Comment Written 18-Aug-2020

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reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020

Thanks for your review. You picked my favourite line also, about the strings being yanked.
The Biblical quote is very appropriate. Man's harmful domination has all been seen before.

Comment from Kermit R. Mullins

Good

Best of luck with this "Free Verse" prompt entry. Life certainly does present it's ups and downs. How we handle them is the key to remaining sane. My reason for a 4 is this. The stated rule suggestion was No Rhyming Pattern. If I am incorrect, I would gladly change my rating. Otherwise, I enjoyed your poem. Best regards.

 Comment Written 18-Aug-2020

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reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020

Thanks for reviewing, Kermit. I appreciate your comments.
I am no expert in poetic forms - I took from the instructions that "No rhyming pattern" could mean that an inconsistent, random rhyme here and there would be ok, just like a free verse poem has "no regular meter and rhythm". My rhymes are random and not in a pattern... which could be seen as permissable?? unless it could be said to be an irregular pattern. But I also note this line in the instructions: "Free verse, despite its freedom, often still has some elements of form." So Basically I was winging it. The scrutineers will have to decide on my poem's eligibility.

Comment from Sandra du Plessis

Excellent

A very well-written free verse poem about chaos in the world caused by the lawless people and leaders of the country who refuse to engage the police to enforce law and order to stop the rioters looting and killing innocent bystanders.

 Comment Written 18-Aug-2020

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reply by the author on 18-Aug-2020

Thanks for reviewing!