Sailors In The Storm
A song of the sea's dangers.16 total reviews
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Hello, my friend,
Wonderful entry for the 34 Syllables writing prompt contest. Good syllable count and connection between lines that flow nicely. Beautiful presentation and painting by Ivan Konstantinovich Aivazovsky. "Ship in Stormy Seas".
I like the sailor and oedipus odyssey style.
Well done!
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Hello, my friend,
Wonderful entry for the 34 Syllables writing prompt contest. Good syllable count and connection between lines that flow nicely. Beautiful presentation and painting by Ivan Konstantinovich Aivazovsky. "Ship in Stormy Seas".
I like the sailor and oedipus odyssey style.
Well done!
Comment Written 28-Aug-2020
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A fine 34 syllables here as your description is atmospheric and full of tuneful rhyme, the sea can be treacherous and many have lost their lives at sea, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2020
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A fine 34 syllables here as your description is atmospheric and full of tuneful rhyme, the sea can be treacherous and many have lost their lives at sea, love Dolly x
Comment Written 27-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 27-Aug-2020
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Thanks for reviewing. I love sailing, but I'd hate to be caught in a storm in open water.
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
What truth is in this little poem. A sailor's life hangs in the balance depending upon the stormy weather and wild seas. Best of luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2020
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What truth is in this little poem. A sailor's life hangs in the balance depending upon the stormy weather and wild seas. Best of luck in the contest!
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2020
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Thank you!
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You're welcome.
Comment from Liz O'Neill
Very nice. I love your use of alliteration. It enriches the sensory experience. These words become onomatopoetic effecting thesound of the splashing against the hull. Well expressed. And you did it in the right number of syllables. I have to give this A+.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2020
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Very nice. I love your use of alliteration. It enriches the sensory experience. These words become onomatopoetic effecting thesound of the splashing against the hull. Well expressed. And you did it in the right number of syllables. I have to give this A+.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2020
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Thank you for such a rave review! I really appreciate your explanation of what appealed to you.
Comment from mermaids
Your words capture a vivid image of sailors at sea and the storm that is upon them. There is a smooth flow to your lines and of course, I like the line "while mermaids murmur". Your poem takes the reader to another place.
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Your words capture a vivid image of sailors at sea and the storm that is upon them. There is a smooth flow to your lines and of course, I like the line "while mermaids murmur". Your poem takes the reader to another place.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
Comment from Mia Twysted
You have given the reader a rounded piture of the high seas. There are always fishermen out in the ocean looking for that which people often believe do not exist.
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You have given the reader a rounded piture of the high seas. There are always fishermen out in the ocean looking for that which people often believe do not exist.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
Comment from zanya
This poem of thrity-four syllables has a lovely wistful tone inspired by the sea - some evocative, beautiful language 'shanties' and alliterative inlay - lovely painting of the ship as it tilts on the high seas
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This poem of thrity-four syllables has a lovely wistful tone inspired by the sea - some evocative, beautiful language 'shanties' and alliterative inlay - lovely painting of the ship as it tilts on the high seas
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written thirty four syllable poem about the ship crew on a stormy ocean chant shanties while they await their fate in the storm where some will survive and some will succumb.
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A very well-written thirty four syllable poem about the ship crew on a stormy ocean chant shanties while they await their fate in the storm where some will survive and some will succumb.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
Comment from robyn corum
Dear Mystery Writer,
How charming! And how terrifying...
This poem about sailors in a storm tells a lot in only a few (well, exactly 34 syllables, I counted) words. Men who lived at the mercy of the winds and waves... and perhaps-- the mermaids and sirens with their lacy nets.
The story itself would have been magical, but when you added all those poetic devices -- the alliteration, consonance, assonance -- and the end rhymes of 'embrace' and 'lace' - you took this post to a whole new level.
It's hard to imagine a piece that might beat it. I'm sorry I don't have a six left for you. But you have my best wishes for luck in the voting! I thank you for this wonderful, seafaring trip!
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Dear Mystery Writer,
How charming! And how terrifying...
This poem about sailors in a storm tells a lot in only a few (well, exactly 34 syllables, I counted) words. Men who lived at the mercy of the winds and waves... and perhaps-- the mermaids and sirens with their lacy nets.
The story itself would have been magical, but when you added all those poetic devices -- the alliteration, consonance, assonance -- and the end rhymes of 'embrace' and 'lace' - you took this post to a whole new level.
It's hard to imagine a piece that might beat it. I'm sorry I don't have a six left for you. But you have my best wishes for luck in the voting! I thank you for this wonderful, seafaring trip!
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
Comment from Janet Foor
Great artwork to compliment your new poem of sea, sailors and storm.
Nice reference to the mermaids (the sirens of the sea).
Well done.
Blessings
Janet
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Great artwork to compliment your new poem of sea, sailors and storm.
Nice reference to the mermaids (the sirens of the sea).
Well done.
Blessings
Janet
Comment Written 26-Aug-2020
