The Miranda Chronicles
Viewing comments for Chapter 17 " What am I Thinking Now (Miranda"Miranda solves a mystery.
14 total reviews
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Oh, how I LOVE this book. I feel so happy when I see your name and "New Writing Online" in my inbox.
This chapter amused me from the get-go ("I never knew teenage boys can eat a week's worth of groceries in two hours." Hilarious...because it's TRUE!!) and "his personal hackey sack." O. M. G. (Thanks so much, Woman, knowing that, because of you, I'll now be thinking THAT little gem for the remainder of my life.)
And the plot with Missy now begins to turn a little unnerving, because tough-as-nails Miranda does not spook easily. So this should be interesting, indeed!!
Great chapter again...just like all the ones that preceded it!!
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2022
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Oh, how I LOVE this book. I feel so happy when I see your name and "New Writing Online" in my inbox.
This chapter amused me from the get-go ("I never knew teenage boys can eat a week's worth of groceries in two hours." Hilarious...because it's TRUE!!) and "his personal hackey sack." O. M. G. (Thanks so much, Woman, knowing that, because of you, I'll now be thinking THAT little gem for the remainder of my life.)
And the plot with Missy now begins to turn a little unnerving, because tough-as-nails Miranda does not spook easily. So this should be interesting, indeed!!
Great chapter again...just like all the ones that preceded it!!
Comment Written 21-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2022
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Thank you, Rachelle, I look forward to your reviews. You don't over analyze Miranda. You just enjoy her. Like I'm enjoying writing about her. Thanks again. Gretchen
Comment from Thesis
This is an interesting bunch of characters. It appears that you can develop multiple story lines with each. I like the toughness of the main character, but there is also a shed of weakness there, that I'm sure you will explore.
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2022
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This is an interesting bunch of characters. It appears that you can develop multiple story lines with each. I like the toughness of the main character, but there is also a shed of weakness there, that I'm sure you will explore.
Comment Written 21-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 21-Oct-2022
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She doesn't like to show her softer vulnerable side but I think we are going to see more in these upcoming chapters. Thank you for the awesome review. Gretchen
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
Well, I will say this about Missy--she has a lot of gall. The nerve
of her asking Miranda to meet for drinks. I'm thrilled Miranda said
no. You did a great job with this chapter, Gretchen. That Ed was
one egotistical piece of work. I bet he never returns to the store.
I liked how Waylon was searching for more to eat. Yes, growing
teen boys can eat like there's no tomorrow. I believe Miranda's
taking stock of her life and hopefully will make some good
decisions.
Thanks for sharing, Jan
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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Well, I will say this about Missy--she has a lot of gall. The nerve
of her asking Miranda to meet for drinks. I'm thrilled Miranda said
no. You did a great job with this chapter, Gretchen. That Ed was
one egotistical piece of work. I bet he never returns to the store.
I liked how Waylon was searching for more to eat. Yes, growing
teen boys can eat like there's no tomorrow. I believe Miranda's
taking stock of her life and hopefully will make some good
decisions.
Thanks for sharing, Jan
Comment Written 20-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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Unfortunately, weirdos like Ed like a challenge. But she's starting to take life seriously. Thanks so much for the awesome review. Gretchen
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😊🐈⬛
Comment from Jay Squires
I love it when Miranda and Missy trade slug barbs, 'cause Miranda always comes out on top. Today, though she seems to feel something more sinister in Missy's words. As usual a well crafted. well edited chapter. I have only one possible, kinda like, suggestion, and I almost deleted it after I wrote it:
Now, I lay here, running my hand over the empty spot where Dougie used to be. [Unless you are trying to stick to a colloquial speech pattern, the correct grammar would be, "Now I LIE here," or "Now I am LYING here," your "Now I LAY here" is past tense.]
Miranda Jessup Buckley doesn't cry. No, I don't cry, I just get saltier. [I love your use of "saltier" here to contrast with crying.]
Excellent continuing chapter, Gretchen!
Jay
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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I love it when Miranda and Missy trade slug barbs, 'cause Miranda always comes out on top. Today, though she seems to feel something more sinister in Missy's words. As usual a well crafted. well edited chapter. I have only one possible, kinda like, suggestion, and I almost deleted it after I wrote it:
Now, I lay here, running my hand over the empty spot where Dougie used to be. [Unless you are trying to stick to a colloquial speech pattern, the correct grammar would be, "Now I LIE here," or "Now I am LYING here," your "Now I LAY here" is past tense.]
Miranda Jessup Buckley doesn't cry. No, I don't cry, I just get saltier. [I love your use of "saltier" here to contrast with crying.]
Excellent continuing chapter, Gretchen!
Jay
Comment Written 20-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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Never, ever, under any circumstances hold back. I am here to improve. I don't cry either. I appreciate all constructive critique. I will fix it immediately. Thank you so much.
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But I was seriously undecided, myself, as to whether a first-person narrator who is as outspoken and gritty as Miranda, would give a crap about my ideas of "purty" writing.
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Both Miranda and I do. Lol
Comment from John Ciarmello
Ha! That scene with Ed, the pervert, is precious! This is a great chapter. I sense a bit more happening with Missy! Great character, but Miranda is still my go-to gal, lol. Loved it! JohnC
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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Ha! That scene with Ed, the pervert, is precious! This is a great chapter. I sense a bit more happening with Missy! Great character, but Miranda is still my go-to gal, lol. Loved it! JohnC
Comment Written 20-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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Missy is a devil in disguise. But Miranda thinks she's a murderer so she is a tad freaked out about the undertone to her comment. Thanks again for a great review. Gretchen
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Good progress. Nicely written.
I'm not sure why Missy asked, "What happened to us? We used to be best friends?" It seems that she knew full well.
Best wishes.
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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Good progress. Nicely written.
I'm not sure why Missy asked, "What happened to us? We used to be best friends?" It seems that she knew full well.
Best wishes.
Comment Written 20-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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In Missys mind, Miranda should forgive her. She's a weird one. Thank you so much for this great review. Gretchen
Comment from lyenochka
Ooh! Missy does sound scary. You created a devious character who is able to offer friendship and appear to be nice but Miranda knows she really could be a serial killer! Wonder who all are in the pond...?
Suggestion:
"No you don't." (No,) At least, that's what I was taught but it's up to you.
She purses her lips the tilts her head (then tilts?)
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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Ooh! Missy does sound scary. You created a devious character who is able to offer friendship and appear to be nice but Miranda knows she really could be a serial killer! Wonder who all are in the pond...?
Suggestion:
"No you don't." (No,) At least, that's what I was taught but it's up to you.
She purses her lips the tilts her head (then tilts?)
Comment Written 20-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 20-Oct-2022
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Thanks for catching those spags. I appreciate the sharp eye. Thank you for the review. Right now, Missy is like a burr under Miranda's saddle. Who knows what the future holds. Gretchen
Comment from royowen
Missy Toblerone strikes me as being positively evil, who makes certain people her pet project. The trouble is, one can't be like her, and someone has to be like her to stop her. Poor Miranda, doesn't really know what love, even though looking after Waylon is love. Beautifully written Gretchen, blessings Roy
Typo : Have (you) got naughty pictures...
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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Missy Toblerone strikes me as being positively evil, who makes certain people her pet project. The trouble is, one can't be like her, and someone has to be like her to stop her. Poor Miranda, doesn't really know what love, even though looking after Waylon is love. Beautifully written Gretchen, blessings Roy
Typo : Have (you) got naughty pictures...
Comment Written 19-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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Thank you, Roy. I think Miranda is usually confused by attention and thinks it's love. Don't think she's ever felt special. As for Missy. She may or may not have off'd her husband. But she is a narcissist and manipulator. She knows Miranda has no use for her and that infuriates her. We will see a lot more of Missy. Lol. Thanks so much for catching the spag and for the terrific review. Gretchen
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I think you?re right
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I know Miranda is not dumb enough to believe one word coming out of Missy's mouth. I do like this story.
I never knew teenage boys can eat a week's worth of groceries in a couple of hours. (As a mother who raised four boys, no truer words have ever been said.)
What, have got naughty pictures of your boss?" (have YOU got???)
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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I know Miranda is not dumb enough to believe one word coming out of Missy's mouth. I do like this story.
I never knew teenage boys can eat a week's worth of groceries in a couple of hours. (As a mother who raised four boys, no truer words have ever been said.)
What, have got naughty pictures of your boss?" (have YOU got???)
Comment Written 19-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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Thanks, Barbara. I have since corrected the spag. And I had three teenage boys and two teenage girls. Believe it or not, girls are worse for the grocery bill than boys. Lol. Gretchen
Comment from Ric Myworld
I don't know what this says about me, but I can relate so much to your characters that I tune into every new post as excited as watching Days of Our Lives. LOL. Thanks for sharing your fun story. No, I've never watched the soap opera.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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I don't know what this says about me, but I can relate so much to your characters that I tune into every new post as excited as watching Days of Our Lives. LOL. Thanks for sharing your fun story. No, I've never watched the soap opera.
Comment Written 19-Oct-2022
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2022
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Lol. Sad truth here but im pulling some of these situations from my experience. Of course I'm dialing them up a tad. Thanks for this awesome review. Gretchen
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LOL. I figured as much. But don't we all build our stories on some elements of truth. Even those we chose to stay hidden. It's always a pleasure!
