Reviews from

Tanka Collection

Viewing comments for Chapter 54 "Dusk Deepens"
Romantic Tanka Poems

11 total reviews 
Comment from Kaiku
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh, to have cries for me! The artwork is wonderful and your words bring it life. I am not familiar with this style of poetry. It can certainly bring a greater breadth of inclusiveness and meaning. Thank you.

 Comment Written 01-Nov-2022


reply by the author on 01-Nov-2022
    Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

    Gypsy
reply by Kaiku on 01-Nov-2022
    My pleasure.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is one of those poems that makes me wonder which came first the artwork or the poem. Which inspired which? For some reason my eyes focused on fox. Not sure why that is. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 31-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
    Thank you very much, Barbara. I hope you are having a great day.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from Sugarray77
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Excellent work on this form, Gypsy. I enjoyed the nuances you included in your choice of words... great theme. You always do such a stellar job on the Tanka forms. I liked it.

Melissa

 Comment Written 31-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
    Thank you very much, Melissa, it's always a pleasure to hear from you. I appreciate that you took the time to read and review my poem.

    Gypsy hugs
    Gypsy
    "Love the ones who understand you and forget the ones that don't." -- Nikki Rowe
Comment from Thomas Blanks
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

No, I do not want to see the rules for this style of poetry, Tanka, but no tanka (haha). I trust you. Your subject matter is one-sided love. Is that ever the story of my life! I'd tell you about it, but they don't make

 Comment Written 31-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
    Thank you very much, Thomas, it's always good to hear from you. I appreciate that you took the time to read and review my poem. I would like to hear it over a couple of drinks, it's the story of my life too. LoL

    Gypsy hugs
    Gypsy
    "Love the ones who understand you and forget the ones that don't." -- Nikki Rowe
reply by Thomas Blanks on 31-Oct-2022
    I see that I didn't finish my sentence... I was going to say... They don't make the box big enough. LOL.
Comment from royowen
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

What a lovely tanka Gypsy, the tragedy of unfortunate male lovers who for one reason or another, perhaps off to war, or called away to pursue work. Beautifully written My friend, well done, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 31-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
    I appreciate that you took the time to read and review my poem. Thank you!

    Gypsy hugs
    "Love the ones who understand you and forget the ones that don't." - Nikki Rowe

reply by royowen on 31-Oct-2022
    Well done
Comment from Tom Horonzy
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

The picture is perfect, and yet I need to ask, enjoyable though this is, why line one has but three syllables and the total therefore is less than
thirty-one. Likely because the requirement can vary slightly?

 Comment Written 31-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
    Hello, Tom, good question. Tanka is 31 syllables OR LESS. the same with haiku 17 syllables OR LESS. The reason is that Japanese syllables and English syllables are different. For example, a famous Japanese haiku written by the father of haiku, Master Matsuo Basho, is the following

    In Japanese:
    Furu ike ya 5 syllables
    kawazu tobikomu 7 syllables
    mizu no oto 5 syllables

    same haiku in English translation

    Old pond 2 syllables
    frogs jumped in 3 syllables
    sound of water. 4 syllables

    click here to read WHY 17 OR LESS SYLLABLES

    thank you very much for taking the time to read and review my poem.

    Gypsy

    I appreciate that you took the time to read and review my poem. Thank you!

    Gypsy hugs
    "Love the ones who understand you and forget the ones that don't." - Nikki Rowe

reply by Tom Horonzy on 31-Oct-2022
    By the way are contractions consider 1 or 2 syllables?
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2022
    Yes, contraptions are 2 syllables.

    Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from Jasmine Girl
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

It's great that you are making a collection of Tanka poems. I like Chie Yoshii's art work, so pure and so perfect. It's sad that such an attractive woman or vixen can't find love.

Well done.

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 31-Oct-2022
    I appreciate that you took the time to read and review my poem. Thank you!

    Gypsy hugs
    "Love the ones who understand you and forget the ones that don't." - Nikki Rowe

Comment from AP Apgar
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I like your Tanka poem- Excellent picture presentation- amazing eyes- fox for sure! Excellent flow- paints a vivid picture - great notes help- I know something about one sided - dis-good- no Lily scented pilliow unfortunately- good job

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 30-Oct-2022
    Ap, Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

    Gypsy hugs
Comment from lyenochka
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

So much emotion is described here first with the mix of feelings as the day ends in dusk, and then the longing cries of the fox moving us to the longing of the narrator over the one-sided love. Great picture, too!

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 30-Oct-2022
    Thank you very much, big sister. I'm happy you understand it so well. Love you ❤️

    Marival
Comment from Liz Westfall
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I really enjoyed your tanka! I'm not super familiar with the format, but I think it was an effective piece. I enjoyed the images you attached, too. I hope your piece does well in the club entry contest!

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 30-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 30-Oct-2022
    Thank you very much for your time, kind review, and helpfull feedback.

    Gypsy hugs