| General Fiction posted October 9, 2022 | Chapters: |
...12 13 -14- 15... 
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Miranda freaks out
A chapter in the book The Miranda Chronicles
Break Down (Miranda)
by GWHARGIS
***So far, Miranda Jessup Buckley, has been jilted, fired and left to take care of her ex-lover's child. She is just getting used to things when his school calls. When she goes down there to find out what the problem is, she comes face to face with her ex mother-in-law. ***
My hands are shaking by the time I get to the car. I want a gun and one bullet, but I'd settle for a cigarette and a beer. Of all people to come face to face with. Why did it have to be her?
I can't tell you how many uncomfortable Thanksgiving dinners I had to sit through. How thankful can you be sitting across the table from someone who hates your guts. There was really no reason for her to hate me. I put up with her damn son who ran around town humping anything with a pulse. For nine years I turned the other cheek until I had whiplash.
My fingers wrap tightly around the steering wheel until my knuckles turn white. I'm trying those calming breathing exercises and I can feel my blood pressure still just amping up. If you know me, then you know that I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut on a good day. Today is not a good day.
"Miranda, I'm sorry about the knife."
Even though I can hear him, all I can do is think about that smug woman who had managed to ruin consecutive Thanksgivings and now my morning. "Mother fucker!" I scream.
Waylon reaches for the door handle. His hand frantically lighting on every spot except the actual handle. "I'm sorry. Geez, I'm so sorry. "
Once the dirty little words are out I take a couple of those cleansing breaths and I can speak. "I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at myself for letting us get mixed up with Aaron and that stupid truck of his. I'm mad at Aaron for putting it in your backpack and I'm mad at Elaine Buckley. I hated her then and I hate her now."
"Was she your principal, too?"
"No. It's worse. I was related to her."
"How?"
"That mean old dried up prune was my mother-in-law."
"You were married?"
"I sure was. I'm gonna give you some advice, kid. Don't ever get married."
"To someone you don't love? "
"Just don't."
"I don't understand. Who shouldn't I get married to?" Waylon is frowning, confused and still slightly traumatized by my outburst.
"Don't get married. Period. Live with them. Travel with them. Do puzzles together. Just don't get married."
"Did she boss you around? She stands in the hall bossing us around. Acts like her poop doesn't stink."
"Every Christmas, she'd buy me some damn frumpy turtleneck sweater. Every year. Did she ever see me wearing a turtleneck sweater? No. No she did not. That was her subtle way of telling me that my boobs were too big. Her words were "they're distracting"."
I happen to glance over and he's smiling. Probably because we are both dismantling his principal.
"What'd you say?"
I smile, thinking back to that final Christmas. I had my unopened gift in my lap. I had already told Farley that if I opened another crappy turtleneck, I was gonna go off on his mother. She was sitting in the wing back chair, her legs twisted to the side like she was in the British monarchy. I could see the look of pure enjoyment come to her pointed face as I started tearing the paper. Thats when I knew it was another sweater.
"Just thought this would cover those up. People won't take you serious in this world. Not when they're distracted by those things."
"For crying out loud, Elaine. They're boobs. Boobs, tits, ta-tas, fun balloons, breasts, or whatever you want to call them. They are not things. You have them, Elaine. You have tits. Surely you've noticed."
"I just think that if you covered them up, people would take you seriously."
"If someone doesn't take me seriously because I have big boobs, that says more about them than me. That's just my humble opinion, Elaine."
"It's Christmas Eve and here you are in a blouse that barely covers them. I just think it's inappropriate."
I toss the box to the side, cover the ground between us in three very aggressive steps. I lean down, making sure that my arms put enough pressure on the sides of my distracting mounds, to pop a button that would shoot off with enough force to go clear through Elaine Buckley's skull. "Why on earth would I cover these voluptuous works of art?"
Elaine had probably never seen cleavage quite like that before. She bolted out of the living room. I know my father-in-law was impressed because it took him five minutes before he realized his wife was gone.
Waylon is still waiting to hear more. "You tell her off?"
"We came to an understanding."
"Ha! I can't wait to tell her I know what a crappy mother-in-law she was."
"No. Waylon, this was a once in a lifetime thing. Do not cross that woman. You stay under the radar from now on. She has already promised me that shes watching you."
"Okay, okay. Geez. What are we gonna tell Aaron about his knife?"
"He can come get it, if he wants to."
"I like him. He's fun."
I shake my head. "I want you to steer clear of him. I know he's a nice guy, but -," I say, unsure how to tell Waylon I don't trust him but Waylon cuts me off.
"He said you're hot."
"Geezus. I must really be a magnet."
"What are you talking about?"
"Someone who attracts a certain type of person."
Thankfully, he just shrugs. Doesn't ask what type is magnetized to me. He taps the passenger side window. "I think they want us to leave."
The resource officer is standing outside now. Arms folded across his chest, legs spread like he's some big dog bad ass.
I should just put the car in drive and pull off but we all know I can't do that. I tell Waylon to roll down the window and I motion him over.
"Now, you make sure you tell Sheriff Taylor that I said hey. Take care of yourself, Barney."
Waylon covers his face with his hands as the resource officer sputters, trying to respond.
I drive Waylon home and let him into the trailer. "Do some schoolwork so you don't fall too far behind. I won't be home until after nine so you're on your own for dinner."
I get to the bottom of the steps when I hear him. "You were pretty cool today."
And hearing those five words was worth facing the dragon.
To be continued ...
***So far, Miranda Jessup Buckley, has been jilted, fired and left to take care of her ex-lover's child. She is just getting used to things when his school calls. When she goes down there to find out what the problem is, she comes face to face with her ex mother-in-law. ***
My hands are shaking by the time I get to the car. I want a gun and one bullet, but I'd settle for a cigarette and a beer. Of all people to come face to face with. Why did it have to be her?
I can't tell you how many uncomfortable Thanksgiving dinners I had to sit through. How thankful can you be sitting across the table from someone who hates your guts. There was really no reason for her to hate me. I put up with her damn son who ran around town humping anything with a pulse. For nine years I turned the other cheek until I had whiplash.
My fingers wrap tightly around the steering wheel until my knuckles turn white. I'm trying those calming breathing exercises and I can feel my blood pressure still just amping up. If you know me, then you know that I have a hard time keeping my mouth shut on a good day. Today is not a good day.
"Miranda, I'm sorry about the knife."
Even though I can hear him, all I can do is think about that smug woman who had managed to ruin consecutive Thanksgivings and now my morning. "Mother fucker!" I scream.
Waylon reaches for the door handle. His hand frantically lighting on every spot except the actual handle. "I'm sorry. Geez, I'm so sorry. "
Once the dirty little words are out I take a couple of those cleansing breaths and I can speak. "I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at myself for letting us get mixed up with Aaron and that stupid truck of his. I'm mad at Aaron for putting it in your backpack and I'm mad at Elaine Buckley. I hated her then and I hate her now."
"Was she your principal, too?"
"No. It's worse. I was related to her."
"How?"
"That mean old dried up prune was my mother-in-law."
"You were married?"
"I sure was. I'm gonna give you some advice, kid. Don't ever get married."
"To someone you don't love? "
"Just don't."
"I don't understand. Who shouldn't I get married to?" Waylon is frowning, confused and still slightly traumatized by my outburst.
"Don't get married. Period. Live with them. Travel with them. Do puzzles together. Just don't get married."
"Did she boss you around? She stands in the hall bossing us around. Acts like her poop doesn't stink."
"Every Christmas, she'd buy me some damn frumpy turtleneck sweater. Every year. Did she ever see me wearing a turtleneck sweater? No. No she did not. That was her subtle way of telling me that my boobs were too big. Her words were "they're distracting"."
I happen to glance over and he's smiling. Probably because we are both dismantling his principal.
"What'd you say?"
I smile, thinking back to that final Christmas. I had my unopened gift in my lap. I had already told Farley that if I opened another crappy turtleneck, I was gonna go off on his mother. She was sitting in the wing back chair, her legs twisted to the side like she was in the British monarchy. I could see the look of pure enjoyment come to her pointed face as I started tearing the paper. Thats when I knew it was another sweater.
"Just thought this would cover those up. People won't take you serious in this world. Not when they're distracted by those things."
"For crying out loud, Elaine. They're boobs. Boobs, tits, ta-tas, fun balloons, breasts, or whatever you want to call them. They are not things. You have them, Elaine. You have tits. Surely you've noticed."
"I just think that if you covered them up, people would take you seriously."
"If someone doesn't take me seriously because I have big boobs, that says more about them than me. That's just my humble opinion, Elaine."
"It's Christmas Eve and here you are in a blouse that barely covers them. I just think it's inappropriate."
I toss the box to the side, cover the ground between us in three very aggressive steps. I lean down, making sure that my arms put enough pressure on the sides of my distracting mounds, to pop a button that would shoot off with enough force to go clear through Elaine Buckley's skull. "Why on earth would I cover these voluptuous works of art?"
Elaine had probably never seen cleavage quite like that before. She bolted out of the living room. I know my father-in-law was impressed because it took him five minutes before he realized his wife was gone.
Waylon is still waiting to hear more. "You tell her off?"
"We came to an understanding."
"Ha! I can't wait to tell her I know what a crappy mother-in-law she was."
"No. Waylon, this was a once in a lifetime thing. Do not cross that woman. You stay under the radar from now on. She has already promised me that shes watching you."
"Okay, okay. Geez. What are we gonna tell Aaron about his knife?"
"He can come get it, if he wants to."
"I like him. He's fun."
I shake my head. "I want you to steer clear of him. I know he's a nice guy, but -," I say, unsure how to tell Waylon I don't trust him but Waylon cuts me off.
"He said you're hot."
"Geezus. I must really be a magnet."
"What are you talking about?"
"Someone who attracts a certain type of person."
Thankfully, he just shrugs. Doesn't ask what type is magnetized to me. He taps the passenger side window. "I think they want us to leave."
The resource officer is standing outside now. Arms folded across his chest, legs spread like he's some big dog bad ass.
I should just put the car in drive and pull off but we all know I can't do that. I tell Waylon to roll down the window and I motion him over.
"Now, you make sure you tell Sheriff Taylor that I said hey. Take care of yourself, Barney."
Waylon covers his face with his hands as the resource officer sputters, trying to respond.
I drive Waylon home and let him into the trailer. "Do some schoolwork so you don't fall too far behind. I won't be home until after nine so you're on your own for dinner."
I get to the bottom of the steps when I hear him. "You were pretty cool today."
And hearing those five words was worth facing the dragon.
To be continued ...
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